Bwahahahahahaha!

A jeweller has been ordered by his local council to hand over gold dust swept up from his workshop floor so that it can be taken to a tip.

John Doble, 50, who runs businesses in Torquay and Brixham, collects tiny gold particles from the floor and benches of his workshop and sells them to a specialist dealer for about £2,000 a year.

Torbay Council has ruled that the gold dust is commercial waste and has asked him to prove that he disposes of it properly. Mr Doble says that the authority refuses to believe that he is not putting it into his dustbin.

The metals business, and the precious metals business in particular, recycles more of its production than any other industry on earth.

Tehre are markets (gallium for example, rhenium, plus those precious metals) where recycled material forms the majority by far of the annual marketplace, hugely greater than the virgin material newly extracted.

That we\’ve got some ignorant jobsworth questioning the practices of this, the most efficient (in this sense of preserving virgin resources) industry doesn\’t surprise me but it does amuse me.

16 comments on “Bwahahahahahaha!

  1. Years ago I chatted with a jeweller once who told me all about how they send their floor sweepings off to be processed, that it was a fortune in gold they saved.

    It might seem incredible to a fuckwit in a council, but it’s bloody obvious if you do the slightest bit of mental arithmetic.

    Tim adds: I should have added that the Bank of England has special vacuum cleaners in the vaults to pick up the gold that gets knocked off the bars as they’re moved around….

  2. “Doesn’t he have receipts?”

    If he doesn’t, Torbay Council are going to have to get in line behind HMRC…

    If they accept that yes, he does this (and his books and records will prove it), then Torbay Council shouldn’t have a leg to stand on.

  3. OK, a fun story, the way the national newspapers are spinning it. But the local rag puts a slightly different light on it:

    “John Doble, who runs Doble Jewellers in Fleet Street, Torquay, claims the council is threatening to fine him unless he provides documentary evidence showing how he disposes of all his waste…And he says he is refusing to fill in the council’s required forms showing how he disposes of all his waste….
    “The council says it is legally required, under the Environmental Protection Act 1990 to monitor the transfer of any commercial waste, including hazardous material, to ensure it is being correctly disposed of.

    A spokesman said: ‘This includes businesses who have chosen to dispose of their waste by means other than the council’s commercial collection service. If the council does not have any details on how a business is disposing of its commercial waste it has a duty to investigate the situation and would be failing in its role as a local authority if it did not do so.'”

  4. Right, let’s try this commenting lark again.

    A fun and funny story, the way the national newspapers are spinning. But thelocal rag puts a slightly different spin on it.

    “John Doble, who runs Doble Jewellers in Fleet Street, Torquay, claims the council is threatening to fine him unless he provides documentary evidence showing how he disposes of all his waste… And he says he is refusing to fill in the council’s required forms showing how he disposes of all his waste.

    The council says it is legally required, under the Environmental Protection Act 1990 to monitor the transfer of any commercial waste, including hazardous material, to ensure it is being correctly disposed of.

    “A spokesman said: ‘This includes businesses who have chosen to dispose of their waste by means other than the council’s commercial collection service. If the council does not have any details on how a business is disposing of its commercial waste it has a duty to investigate the situation and would be failing in its role as a local authority if it did not do so.'”

  5. Anyone remotely literate knows the value of gold dust.
    The best cricket balls are stamped with gold leaf. The makers of such balls also sweep their floors.
    You’re right, we are ruled by morons. We now know they are illiterate too.

  6. I was once told by a printer that as an apprentice he had knocked over a tin of gold paint that genuinely was mainly gold (for doing gold leaf on posh books) and they worked out it was worthwhile tearing up the floorboards and selling them to a gold recycling chappy.

    So they did, of course.

  7. I was talking a while ago to a chap I know who has one of those small artisan workshops above the jewellery stores in Hatton Garden. When he and his partners move premises, one of the things they will do is take up the lino from the floor of the workroom and have the whole thing smelted down to recycle the gold, silver and platinum dust ground into it.

  8. As someone who worked as a jeweller many moons ago can concur with Jeremiah et al on this. We had special traps on the handbasin & periodically the floor vaccings would go off to Johnson Matthey’s.
    As the most convenient way to lubricate the saw blade was to lick it It’s a wonder we weren’t recycling the recycling if you see what I mean.

    On a more serious note, gotta wonder what he’s been doing with the acids, fluxes & all the other nasty chemicals. We used to chuck em down the sink but I shouldn’t think that’d pass these days. Nor would forgetting to wash your hands & ingesting cyanide with your sarnies please the H&S people. Could always tell ’cause it made the heart race a bit & caused a sort of fluttery feeling….nothing that a couple of pints couldn’t cure though.

  9. I used to buy various types of precious metal scrap. There’s a whole general category of scrap referred to as “sweeps.”

    And, though I have no first-hand knowledge of what I am bout to write, it was said very generally that jewelry workshops had a very good idea of the amount of time that needed to elapse before tearing out the floor would pay for the process, the installation of a new floor, and a decent party.

    My favorite gold story follows.

    Ed Yardeni, chief economist for several of the major brokerage firms, admitted on TV that he rushed out and bought “a whole bunch of Krugerrands” on the very day in 1980 on which gold reached its highest price.

    On that same day, 4 friends and I were on the upper Caroni River (in the Guayana Highlands of Venezuela, not far from Angel Falls). We were breaking camp, preparing to push on up the river, when an native woman pulled up in her boat; she had bananas, oranges, etc. to sell and we bought some.

    In conversation with our two guides, she told them that people had leaned from short-wave radio that gold had hit $850 per ounce troy (we were supposedly “prospecting”).

    Immediately, our guides got excited and wanted to go back downriver (about 30 miles) to Uriman, where they could sell what they carried
    in their “pokes” to Ramon Pena, the general-store owner. We couldn’t get them to understand the inconvenience of the delay that would cause us, so proposed buying their dust (actually tiny grains) at the going price. We were relieved when that only cost us $40-50 or so.

  10. “A jeweller has been ordered by his local council to hand over gold dust swept up from his workshop floor so that it can be taken to a tip.”

    “Hand over your gold dust, so we can take it to the tip!” Yeah, right.

    Gordon Brown must be desperate.

  11. I suspect this is more likely to be an attempt by the council to boost their own income. Some of the councils charge several thousands of pounds per year, on top of the normal business rate, to collect the waste from commercial premises. If he hasn’t signed up a contract with them, they will try to strong-arm him into it.

  12. John Doble is a W***** of the highest order. It wouldn’t surprise me if he wasnt keeping his receipts.
    This is a man who once sneezed an envelope full of diamonds into a typewriter!!!!! Oh, and there was a time he left his shop keys at a CIRCUS of all places!

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