Silliness in Somerset

Glastobnbury always ha been and odd sort of place….

But now the residents of Glastonbury, which has long been a favoured destination for pilgrims, are at the centre of a bitter row in which many blame the town\’s new wireless computer network – known as wi-fi – for a spate of health problems.

Some healers even hold that electro-magnetic fields (EMFs) generated by the wi-fi system are responsible for upsetting positive energy fields of the body, which are known as chakras, and positive energy fields of the earth, which are known as ley lines.

There are now calls for the project, the first of its kind in Britain, to be "unplugged" and for wi-fi masts in the centre of the Somerset market town to be removed just seven months into its experimental run.

Well, before anyone can show that Wi-Fi disrupts chakras, it\’s necessary to show that chakras exist, not something which has been done as yet.

Matt Todd, who campaigns against EMFs, said that residents had complained that chakras and ley lines are being disrupted. "They believe positive energy flows are being disturbed," he said.

Mr Todd has started building small generators which he believes can neutralise the allegedly-harmful radiation using the principles of orgone science. The pyramid-like machines use quartz crystals, selenite (a clear form of the mineral gypsum), semi-precious lapis lazuli stones, gold leaf and copper coil to absorb and recycle the supposedly-negative energy.

Nice to see an entrepreneur starting up in these difficult times.

A spokesman for Powerwatch, an independent EMF pressure group, said: "Someone using a wi-fi laptop will be exposed to approximately twice the level of radiation as someone living 70 yards from a mobile phone mast.

And the proof that this level of radiation is dangerous is what?

11 comments on “Silliness in Somerset

  1. Cordless phones, microwaves and wireless networks all use the same frequency, so a pause for thought isn’t entirely unjustified.

    Perhaps a laptop decorated with quartz, gold leaf and lapis lazuli will be next year’s ‘must have’ for the seriously concerned.

  2. “Cordless phones, microwaves and wireless networks all use the same frequency, so a pause for thought isn’t entirely unjustified.”

    Only if there is some rational thought. Which is sadly lacking. Perhaps thought is impossible, what with the ley lines bending and the crystal energy becoming misaligned.

  3. Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.

    said Arthur C Clarke

    which tells me that wifi and chakras are pretty much indistinguishable.

  4. bdbd – my wifi LAN connection works because I am using it to connect to the internet. Are you telling me that I could save myself a fortune by doing it via chakras?

  5. “which tells me that wifi and chakras are pretty much indistinguishable.”

    If you think WiFi is that advanced then you don’t understand WEP.

  6. diogenes, you pay in other ways using chakras, I’m sure. That’s an odd use of “because” I think.

    KT, I don’t know much about WEP (in fact I have no idea what the letters stand for), but I do not think wifi is all that advanced. I guess your if-then is still OK, as far as it goes. I don’t know much about chakras, either. It was just a joke itching to be made. I”m sure you’re more knowledgeable than I am, and smarter to boot! Thanks for taking time to let me know!

  7. While I like Arthur C Clarke’s sound bite he did miss one important factor – technology tends to work. Magic tends not to.

    Why do we have to suffer these morons? Is it time for a little less understanding or was my coffee just too strong this morning?

  8. “I don’t know much about WEP”

    That’s funny, because I don’t know much about chakras.

    “one important factor – technology tends to work. Magic tends not to.”

    Anyone who tried to use Bluetooth would agree that technology is indistinguishable from magic in your definition. Alohamora!

  9. I suggest that the local council subsidise the building of the “generators” that use lapis lazuli or kryptonite or whatever it was to “neutralise” the dangerous radiation.

    Lots of them, all over the place.

    Then the network will be useless and they can all go back to sleep.

    Apart from those who don’t believe a word of it, of course, and they can just carry on as if the crystals etc were not there at all. As if, in fact, they had no effect whatever on… uh-oh. Giving the game away a bit here.

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