Cleverest women are the heaviest drinkers

Makes sense.

A similar link between educational attainment and alcohol consumption is seen among men, but the correlation is less strong.

Mmm hmm.

Women\’s alcohol consumption can even be predicted from their scores in school tests taken when they are as as young as five.

Can\’t see any problem with any of this. Those bright enough to understand the rigorous shafting we get from the politicians are those most likely to need a drink or two.

We should of course have concern for the health of those driven to drinking so much that they damage their own health. Fortunately, economists have such a solution. If one group or activity is imposing an externality upon another then that first group or activity should be taxed by the amount of that externality they\’re imposing. This is known as Pigou Taxation.

There\’s no particular reason why such taxation should be purely monetary either. As long as a cost equal to the costs being imposed is imposed then the logic of the system works.

\”People who abuse alcohol face a higher risk of suffering from health problems incluidng cancer, liver cirrhosis, lung and cardiovascular disease, and mental and behavioural issues.\”

That is, the activities of politicians are killing some people. Thus to balance this we should kill some politicians. The ONS tells us that alcohol kills 13.6 per 100,000 each year. Thus we should be killing 13.6 per 100,000 politicians each year. Or, roughly, over a century we randomly select 8 MPs and hang them just pour encourager les autres. Perhaps make it one a decade as a special, to be looked forward to, event.

That seems a little infrequent agreed, but there are 22,000 councillors in England alone meaning that we\’ll also have 3 or so happy jolly gatherings under the gallows each year for our sortition of local politicians.

We should note that there\’s absolutely nothing unusual in the logic here. This is exactly what Lord Stern did in his review to justify higher carbon taxes. If a cost is being imposed then action must be taken to impose the same cost on those imposing the original cost.

Some will quibble that it\’s not the politicians driving people to drink but that\’s clearly ridiculous. Anyone at all who observes them with even the quickest of glances is driven to drink.

One comment on “Cleverest women are the heaviest drinkers

  1. “People who abuse alcohol face a higher risk of suffering from health problems incluidng cancer, liver cirrhosis, lung and cardiovascular disease, and mental and behavioural issues.”

    Though of course, there is an argument that one of the strongest abuses of alcohol is to not drink it.

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