40 comments on “Timmy elsewhere

  1. I wouldn’t use their official figures. I work with a number of people who get CRBs: none has ever had one come back in under a month (and we are talking several dozen people), most wait around eight weeks.

  2. Ah but isn’t this what le petit Richard la Troisième á la Maison de Muph refers to as not being a serious argument.
    Surely you’re neglecting the contributions made to the economy by those diligent folk at the CRB & their attendant hordes of diversity attainment supervisors, workplace safety officers etc
    Must add up to well north of £5b worth of useful economic activity there alone.

  3. Generally, I get CRB checks done in two weeks. Given that most people I hire have to give notice to their current employer, the two week turnaround is not an inconvenience. The real inconvenience is having to get the damn things in the first place!

  4. “But what about the kiddeeeeeeeeeeees? How can you be so monstrous as to put a price on their safety?”

    You can put a price on everything, BP estimates the value of a worker’s life at $10 million.

    Protecting a child from buggery etc must have an acceptable price.

    I’m not saying CRBs are it (what’s the false positive rate like in a CRB check? I’m guessing enough to be worrysome given the high numebrs involveD), but yeah, some loss of measured output is going to be acceptable.

    The consequences of paedophilia do not appear in GDP figures.

  5. There are costs for the schoolchildren arising from the CRB mindset. There are many opportunities which are closed, or closing to them. Volunteers who used to provide informal activities for the youngsters, are now pulling out. So there goes the pond-dipping club, and the astronomy on the beach with the bairns allowed to look through the telescope. And the model aeroplane club and the angling club have ended their activities for junior enthusiasts. Many more never get started when people of goodwill learn they would be entering a punitive regime, in which they would be viewed with suspicion. Unwholesome by default.

    Businesses no longer offer work experience placements for the younger high school cohort, because they would have to subject their staff to CRB checks.

    This has driven the enthusiastic volunteers out of the sector, leaving only the salaried functionaries with their clipboards, and their clinical obsession with health and safety, to the extent they won’t let the children do anything. In the meantime, the kids are bored to tears during the summer holidays, and ultimately they get into more danger left to their own devices, playing on the bloody railway line.

    And the perverts who really are intent on abusing children, are still embedded in the system that gives them unrestricted access to children.

  6. Left,

    I was making a joke. Some of our more HSE committed chums appear willing to spend almost anything to protect everyone and any attempt to put a price on their efforts brings about more wailing and gnashing of teeth than was ever to be found in The Bible.

  7. More important than all these comments is: where is Tim?

    (Not posting new blog articles is the digital equivalent of not taking the milk in)

  8. They seek him here, they seek him there.
    The bugger isn’t anywhere!

    Where is the Scarlet Timpernell?

  9. Serf – “Richard Murphy has got to him”

    Can you imagine Rich trying to organise a hit? Where do you get a Fairtrade gun these days?

    I prefer to think that his first royalty cheque came for his book and he has been blowing it all on expensive Scotch, top quality Peruvian Happy Dust and cheap Tarts.

  10. Ey Subtelty!

    Why you giva our host da bunba bunga party witha da cheap tarts, hey? Wassa matta wid you head?

    For da last time, itsa da gooda booze, da gooda nose candy and da gooda bims. No cheapa tarts. Cappice?

  11. I reject the hit.

    It’s not tax deductible unless you ‘diguise’ it as business travel. And an upright honest citizen wouldn’t do that.

    My money is on a dose of the flu. Last week I had to take two days off. First time in years. Absolutely shagged (tired that is).

    Get better Tim. Are you receiving sufficient tender loving care? Or will we have to get tough with the missus?

  12. Don Silvio B – “Ey Subtelty Why you giva our host da bunba bunga party witha da cheap tarts, hey? Wassa matta wid you head?”

    Hey, not fair. I am not giving him anything! At worst I am recommending.

    Anyway, he lives in Portugal. Where is he going to find expensive ones?

  13. Monty

    I agree. My kids play football in the school team. They are regularly refereed by a retired pro.

    He is the best ref they could have. He educates them in manners, talks to them when they start bad-mouthing. He holds up play if there is the slightest suspicion of injury and talks to the coaches when they get abusive. Perfect for 13 year olds.

    Problem. When a kid gets up after a foul, he ruffles their hair. When he should show a yellow, he takes the kid aside, putting his arm over his shoulder and patiently explains what they have done wrong and gets them to admit it.

    Now half the parents are accusing him of being a paedophile. Unbelievable but true. The day somebody accuses him I can see him giving up refereeing.

    By the way, all my kids get in bed with me on a Sunday morning when I let them (depends on the wine consumed the night before). My daughter is 18. Wanna make something of that
    ?

    We will all lose out.

  14. Subtlety

    Giving, recommending. Alla same tagliatelli froma where I standing.

    Ana don’ make dat quip ’bout there bein’ no expensive tarts ina Portugal if my frein’ Dom Socrates isa closa by.

  15. Hola Senor B,
    I hath asked thee cheepa chicas inna los pueblos an they no havva seed heem nowear.

  16. It’s odd how one’s perception of somebody tends to form around their blogging habits. Some post so infrequently that if they made appearances more than twice a week I’d think they must have lost their job. Monsieur Worstall disappears for 48 hours – even missing Toynbee, Monbiot and Hutton’s latest columns – and I start to feel that something’s up.

  17. Hard to understand how he equates the City of London with the banks.

    Had a look at his web. His comment to one poor blogger was just soooooo patronising.

  18. Man is a complete tosser isn’t he? I should think my latest comment will be deleted.

    I wonder if he’s the slightest knowledge of how the City operates, its assets, whatever? Looks to me as if he’s on some sort of lefty jealousy/victimisation trip.

    Actually I do resent being patronised & am seriously thinking about flying up & kicking shite out of the cnut. I may have a few years on him but he does have a face that’s long overdue for a slapping.

  19. Don Silvio B – “Giving, recommending. Alla same tagliatelli froma where I standing.”

    Ahh, the free and relaxed ways of our southern Mediterranean brethren!

    “Ana don’ make dat quip ’bout there bein’ no expensive tarts ina Portugal if my frein’ Dom Socrates isa closa by.”

    Really? Thanks for the warning. What does he do if you point out that a lot of the higher class ones were originally boys from Brazil?

    Kay Tie – “Flying to Norfolk? They’ve only just got over the shock of the Roman legions leaving.”

    Rightly. That was the last time there was a fresh flow of new genes into the gene pool.

    Now that Tim is away, is there anyone else I might want to casually insult? Well not really. Just Richie, but that seems too easy. Cruel really. Like fishing with dynamite. Except that Richie tends to provide the dynamite.

  20. Left Outside writes: “The consequences of paedophilia do not appear in GDP figures.”

    This set me thinking generally. Does running prisons directly increase GDP?

    Best regards

  21. What does he do if you point out that a lot of the higher class ones were originally boys from Brazil?

    Howa you know so much abouta LadyBoys from Brazil, huh?

    There’sa no Lady Boys ata my bunga bunga parties, thatsa for sure.

  22. Paul,

    Why be so pesimistic (and boring) about Mr W’s reasons for absence?

    Until we learn the truth (which will probably be pretty mundane), won’t it be more fun if we discussed whether he’s become the victim of a mafia style contract put out by Polly, Richie or Will.

  23. Don Silvio B – “Howa you know so much abouta LadyBoys from Brazil, huh?”

    I have drunk deep from the well that produced the parties funded by the European Union. Besides, I don’t like to drop names, but if you party with enough footballers, you learn these things.

    “There’sa no Lady Boys ata my bunga bunga parties, thatsa for sure.”

    Even Ronaldo was fooled so you can’t be so sure these days.

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