Breaking! Nigel Farage can eat a bacon buttie!

My word, how does he do it?

It’s the snack that came back to bite one party leader – but Nigel Farage fearlessly tucked into a bacon buttie yesterday in front of photographers.

The Ukip chief was canvassing ahead of next week’s by-election in Heywood and Middleton in Greater Manchester, when his deputy leader Paul Nuttall ordered the MEP a bacon sandwich from a takeaway van.

Unlike Ed Miliband – who was subjected to widespread mockery – Mr Farage passed the test, taking sizeable mouthfuls throughout.

No, there is a serious point here. Which is that our next Prime Minister could be someone who is provably incapable of eating a bacon sandwich. Not on religious, ethical or moral grounds, any of those would be fine, but just in the physical ability to manage the process.

Is it too much to ask that those who would rule us be competent at something or other?

12 comments on “Breaking! Nigel Farage can eat a bacon buttie!

  1. When Labour were in power, and Miliband would appear on Newsnight etc, I used to think he was quite persuasive – in the sense that he was articulate, reasonable-sounding and quick witted.

    I thought for a long time that this ‘Miliband’s weird’ stuff made no sense. (My wife, who’s far less interested in politics than I am, has been convinced for years that he’s some sort of alien, while I couldn’t really see it. I flatter myself that it’s because I actually am interested in policies, not personalities.)

    Lately, I’m starting to see it. There was some footage of him walking at the Labour conference; the bloke can’t even walk normally.

    Still not why I won’t be voting for him, and I still think he’s the next PM, but he perhaps is a bit weird.

  2. He’ll be the next PM in large part to the man who out bacon buttied him.

    (Is a bacon buttie a snack though?)

  3. I wouldn’t call Miliband weird exactly – awkward yes, weird no.

    Milibands main image problem is that he’s the epitome of a modern political hack, and has no real experience of normal people and looks desperately uncomfortable when forced to interact with unwashed. Did you see the footage of him in Glasgow last month? The man looked utterly terrified just walking down the street. In fact he often looks terrified, permanently on the look-out for the big boys who are coming to take his lunch money.

    I’ve got a horrible sinking feeling he’ll be No 10 next year though. Nothing to do with his qualities, a balloon on the stick with a red rosette could have done as good a job as Miliband.

  4. Also, I will never understand why the Labourites went for Edward M as their Grand Poobah. He had a perfectly undistinguished ministerial career, and has no other accomplishments outside of party politics. No-one would claim he is a font of charm, he is not a great speaker and after several years of keeping mum, it turns out he doesn’t have any ideas either. FFS his flagship policy is price controls and more tax.

  5. Is it too much to ask that those who would rule us be competent at something or other?

    I’ve decided that the photographs on election posters are a pretty good way to decide who to vote for. Two things we want from politicians are the ability to organise some experts into doing something properly, and a bit of basic judgement. So anyone who hires a professional photographer and make-up artist and gets a load of photos taken and goes through them all to pick the very best one to put on their posters and still ends up looking like a waxen loon with a tazer up their arse is not fit for office.

  6. Squander Two – “So anyone who hires a professional photographer and make-up artist and gets a load of photos taken and goes through them all to pick the very best one to put on their posters and still ends up looking like a waxen loon with a tazer up their arse is not fit for office.”

    Lincoln?

  7. I will never understand why the Labourites went for Edward M as their Grand Poobah.

    Well they didn’t really, it was the union block vote that forced Ed Miliband on the Labour Party. Not that his brothers achievements were significantly more impressive, but certainly David Miliband was less idealogical than his brother.

    As for his way of speaking, Ed Miliband sounds like he’s got a mouth stuffed full of marbles when he talks and I can only understand about 1 word in 3.

    That boy needs some speech therapy.

  8. The whole image thing annoys me, because it seems to take precedence over Miliband’s more worrying weaknesses – his intellectual arrogance and inability to learn from history.

  9. “Is it too much to ask that those who would rule us be competent at something or other?”

    No. But for most of them, competence at eating a bacon sarnie without looking like a berk would be a start at least.

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