The false consciousness created by the patriarchy

One in three women believe that those who get drunk or wear short skirts are partly to blame if they are sexually assaulted, according to a new report.

I mean, obviously, this must be the patriarchy, right? Because no one ever argues that a bloke mouthing off at people contributes to his being punched, do they?

28 comments on “The false consciousness created by the patriarchy

  1. I have always been told that if you are charged with rape, hope that there are some later-than-middle aged women on the jury. Especially if you did it. No one hates women like other women hate women.

    It was the mistake at the OJ trial. The prosecutors tried to pack the jury with women – because OJ had beaten his wife – while the defence tried to pack it with Blacks. The compromise was a jury largely made up of Black women – 10 women and 2 men, 9 Blacks, two Whites and one Hispanic. The Black women did not give a damn that OJ killed his wife. A White woman married a Black man and so made it harder for them to find a husband?

  2. As the police are always telling us, don’t leave valuables on view in your car, make sure you double lock your patio doors, don’t flash your mobile phone around late at night…the victim-blaming bastards.

  3. How does this square with the cultural enrichers who are divinely informed that any woman not concealed in a shroud and chaperoned by a male relative is asking for it? Would the Fawcett Society see fit to re-educate these males?

  4. NielsR – “Blame isn’t zero-sum.”

    Nor is being stupid a crime even if it makes people say you are rather stupid.

    What people miss is that these things are written down as if they are isolated from context. But the people responding are thinking about context. If a girl got drunk by confusing apple cider with apple juice and wandered by mistake into a Hell’s Angels’ party while looking for her friends, I don’t think many people would say she was to blame. But if she went out with some friends to see some other friends, and some alcohol was consumed by the boys and the girls and she woke up in the bed of a boy who had been drinking a lot, quite a few people might say she has some degree of blame.

  5. It’s a feedback loop.

    1. Women flirt to attract men.
    2. They attact the wrong kind of men.
    3. They whinge for laws against sexual harassment.
    4. Men are now reluctant to approach.
    5. Women increase apparent availability to overcome reluctance.
    6. goto 2

    Repeat until women are lying naked on the floor in a drunken coma.

  6. In an ideal world women should be able to be drunk without fear of assault (although they could still have accidents) and everyone could use expensive phones without fear of being mugged.
    I think we should look at how to achieve this.
    @So Much For Subtlety
    Good points

  7. @Roue. Good point but the ones lying drunk are not the same as the ones complaining. They are the ones suffering avoidance by men. I have a teenage son and it unfortunately is time to educate him about women and their confusing ways. My view that The current trends are making the costs of mistakes higher so men do less chimes perfectly with yours.

    My son’s reciept of Snapchat *selfie* photos of girls with drawn on penis in own mouth would tend to support your availability point as well. My son isn’t 16 yet.

  8. @anon – absolutely.

    But how many of these cases are girls who got drunk, gave vigorous, drunken consent and then either don’t remember it or regretted it afterwards?

    As if that’s never happened to a guy who got drunk and dragged into bed by some voracious hippocrocogorillapig.

  9. The conflating of being drunk with wearing short skirts is as disingenuous as it is deliberate. Being drunk impairs judgement, which can lead to a woman putting herself in a dangerous situation. Wearing a short skirt does nothing of the sort, and the only people who seem to offer this up as an excuse are our more diverse members of society.

  10. Tim Newman – “The conflating of being drunk with wearing short skirts is as disingenuous as it is deliberate.”

    A lawyer told me once that the defense often tries to get the girl’s clothes introduced into evidence because a rape charge often follows someone sleeping with a prostitute and then not paying.

    However in general, what a sensible jury would want to know is what was going on in the boy’s mind and in the girl’s mind. If a girl is clearly dressed for going out on the pull – and have you seen what girls wear these days when they got out? – she is clearly going out on the pull. A boy might well have some grounds for confusion. A 12 year old girl who was wearing her school uniform before being snatched by a stranger, less so. Again context is important and these studies do not ask which context is suggested to the people being asked.

  11. The problem here is that ‘blame’ is a loaded word with connotations of morality.

    Going out on the piss dressed like a whore is not ‘wrong’, but it is stupid.

    Forcing yourself on someone who is pissed is both wrong and stupid.

    People don’t seem to be able to wrap their heads around this distinction, and as JuliaM hints, people don’t apply this consistently. The same people who shout about victim blaming when it comes to rape have no difficulty attributing terrorism to western action in Iraq and Afghanistan. Conversely, the right-wingers who foam at the mouth at the slightest allusion to any causal relationship between CIA rendition and jihadists will happily ‘slut-shame’ without compunction.

  12. @Ben S:“Forcing yourself on someone who is pissed is both wrong and stupid….”

    Rarely is there any forcing going on. As abacab points out.

  13. JuliaM – “Rarely is there any forcing going on. As abacab points out.”

    Actually I hate to disagree but I do. I think there is a great deal of forcing going on. A lot of it is not actionable though. If everyone is drunk, or claims to be, then there is no way anyone can prove anything.

    However I also don’t think those girls are stupid. I think they know what they want and they are taking a calculated risk. We know it is calculated because they often make precautions to stay with friends or in bright places and so on. But they want to meet some boys and perhaps end the evening giving him a blow job in the toilets or such like. And they are willing to take the risk they will end up with someone a lot less fun.

    I certainly know women who were young and foolish – and got drunk and were assaulted or raped. Either I have a very unusual pool of friends or it is actually quite common. I would assume grandmothers had a reason to tell girls not to dress like sluts and get drunk in public places. I don’t think those reasons have gone away. I just don’t think there is much we can do about it except tell girls not to get drunk in public places.

  14. Mode of dress is a form of signalling, non-verbal communication.

    If a gent goes out in a nice tweed suit with a wedding ring, he’s signalling one thing. If he goes out in spangly PVC leggings with a thong conspicuously poking out and a 1980’s crop-top, he’s signalling something entirely different. Firstly, that he’s fabulous. Secondly, that he’s available for certain horizontal activites.

  15. I really don’t get the “I was drunk therefore it was rape” thing. Surely any reasonable man, upon arrest, would immediately request that the girl be charged for rape as “I too was drunk therefore it was rape”.

  16. @James in NZ: men can’t, legally, be raped. The best they could expect was a charge of sexual assault, and the CPS would never wear this.

  17. The funny thing about “dressed like a whore” is that all the whores I’ve come across around the world dress fairly modestly so as not to attract official attention. The girls in the bustiers, microskirts and tattoos are just ordinary girls out on the pull.

  18. Going out on the piss dressed like a whore is not ‘wrong

    Yes, but going out dressed like a whore and not getting smashed is perfectly fine. Jesus, I see what some of the French and Russian women wear, and they seem to do fine: they just don’t get so smashed they “forget” they agreed to be shagged behind a wheelie bin at the back of a seedy nightclub.

  19. Secondly, that he’s available for certain horizontal activites.

    But will settle for vertical ones if the toilet cubicle is too small.

  20. You also have the problem that Grandma says “don’t dress like a slut”, and granddaughter says “I’m not dressed like a slut, this is normal day-to-day going-out-on-the-lash dressing”.

  21. TimN,

    “The conflating of being drunk with wearing short skirts is as disingenuous as it is deliberate. Being drunk impairs judgement, which can lead to a woman putting herself in a dangerous situation.”

    Up to a point. Being drunk and wearing scanty clothing can lead to showing even more flesh than was intended with signals being misinterpreted.

    Anyway, I’ve never understood this desire to shag a girl who is so pissed she is likely to throw up on you or pass out. Getting a bit pissed and being a willing and active participant, yes, but comatose?

  22. “Anyway, I’ve never understood this desire to shag a girl who is so pissed she is likely to throw up on you or pass out. Getting a bit pissed and being a willing and active participant, yes, but comatose?”

    I think the attraction is largely between two participants who are both in the state indicated.

  23. My wife once commented that you can tell who the working girls are in the winter as they are the ones sensible enough to wear coats

  24. What I hate is those victim-blaming insurance companies that won’t pay up if you leave your car keys in the ignition and the window rolled down. We should Teach Men Not To Steal Cars.

  25. James in NZ – “I really don’t get the “I was drunk therefore it was rape” thing. Surely any reasonable man, upon arrest, would immediately request that the girl be charged for rape as “I too was drunk therefore it was rape”.”

    An Asian student got so drunk he passed out. A female student performed oral sex on him in that state. She later cried sexual assault. Amherst had texts showing it was not an assault but they still expelled him.

    https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2015/05/29/amherst/4t6JtKmaz7vlYSrQk5NDyJ/story.html

    Notice how long it takes for them to get to the point where they mention he was passed out.

  26. Incidentally anyone see the Daily Mail uncritically printing some Belgian woman claims that she was sold into an Upper class Belgian paedophile ring which tortured her for years and practiced human sacrifice etc etc?

    There is clearly false consciousness out there. Well false recovered memories. Or just scams.

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