31 comments on “They’d bloody better

  1. Dress-Up will try to including all the trappings of tyranny–biometrics whatever–that she can.

  2. Too right, £500M is having a laugh. Passports all conform to some international standard for size & the stuff on the info page so none of that can really change. So they’ll retain the ‘Her Britannic Majesty’s Secretary of State Requests and Requires…’ copperplate & the rest of it and just change the colour. Presumably no-one else has copyrighted the Pantone number for that particular blue, but you never know.

  3. Snigger, no. The £500 million is the passport printing, provisioning, database (maybe?) etc contract for x number of years. Which needs to be allocated in 2019 again.

    Whether there’s a red or a navy blue cover will cost about 7 pence. Maybe that much. OK, maybe £50 if they have choccie biccies at the meeting to decide it.

  4. @Tractor Gent,

    You shock me that there are international agreements on passport sizes, content, and so on.

    And why pray does Britain, proud, free, and ancient Britain, allow itself to be dictated to by foreigners, on matters such as the dimensions of passports? Or why even, when a Free Born Englishman enters a foreign land, why does he have to identify himself when some jumped-up foreigner in an SS uniform demands “Papiere Bitte”? The mere fact of being obviously English grants free passage to all corners.

    I bet they are in metric as well, these so-called “international conventions”.

  5. A very old bloke of my acquaintance said that he didn’t take a passport for a holiday in France, starting 6th June, 1944 …

  6. And why pray does Britain, proud, free, and ancient Britain, allow itself to be dictated to by foreigners, on matters such as the dimensions of passports? Or why even, when a Free Born Englishman enters a foreign land, why does he have to identify himself when some jumped-up foreigner in an SS uniform demands “Papiere Bitte”? The mere fact of being obviously English grants free passage to all corners.

    Well, you’ve convinced us.

  7. Back of envelope calculation
    £500 million for costs to issue passports for 10 years.
    Just renewing mine (curses! in EU mauve!) cost about £100 + or – whether you need it delivered fast, slow, overseas, etc.
    About 50 million people + need a British passport.

    Nice work if you can get it. You can get it if you try, and succeed in having the monopoly.

  8. You’re not just paying for the creation of the physical document. You’re also paying for all the behind-the-scenes activity to make sure you really are who you say you are.

  9. CJ Nerd – “You’re also paying for all the behind-the-scenes activity to make sure you really are who you say you are.”

    I have yet to see the slightest evidence that anyone is doing anything even remotely resembling this. Certainly lesser things like NI numbers are given out like PCP at a kiddies’ party.

    I am willing to offer odds that my next passport will be pink. For Breast Cancer Awareness or something. Actually that might look rather good.

  10. Biggie: Prior to WW1 there were no mass passports.

    So once again your adopted shower were at the heart of dirty work. Pioneering ways to make the world a worse place to live courtesy of the German state.

    As the song says : So much has happened but nothing has changed.

  11. Buried in the article – will not cost a penny as a replacement for the same work in burgundy.

    Telegraph probably shitstirring Gaderene Remoniacs.

  12. I despair that Passports & Gibraltar grab all the attention instead of the EU thinking they’ll refuse to talk trade until we’ve agreed to ‘settle our liabilities’, ie that £50bn they’re looking for.

    They just can’t learn – that approach got us the leave result to start with.

  13. They just can’t learn – that approach got us the leave result to start with.

    And hopefully it will get us a nice, clean, WTO Brexit.

  14. What Andrew M said. It doesn’t bother me in the slightest either, any more than it doesn’t bother me that my Irish passport isn’t green. It’s just a distraction from the real business of getting free from the whole horrific institution.

  15. Bloke in Apia – that’s pretty damn spiffy.

    Chernyy_Drakon – Agreed! No writing, either. Just black on black, because that’ll show we’re metal.

  16. The passports should also play a loud , tinny version of “Soldiers of the Queen” whenever they are opened. Like a patriotic version of those birthday cards.

    By the time they get to “and when we say we always won” for the 3rd time or so most custom hacks–regardless of nation–will feel like expediting your free passage into or out of their country double-quick.

  17. That old GB passport was a pain in the neck – just too big and stiff to fit in your coat inside pocket, so you had to put it in a bag or in an outer pocket, which was an invitation to pickpockets. Give me the modern soft-spined passport any day

  18. And it always looked black to me. Tim the zealot was too young to experience the inconvenience of the thing

  19. BiG: I’ve got no issues with international standards. I’m even in favour of metric, being an engineer. But one of the things about standards is that they should be essential to the process rather than something some civil servant thought might be a good idea.

  20. Special Estate-Agent Ecks

    “Biggie: Prior to WW1 there were no mass passports.

    So once again your adopted shower were at the heart of dirty work. Pioneering ways to make the world a worse place to live courtesy of the German state”

    Are you trying to say that no one should have passports, because: freedom from the tyranny?

  21. No –I’m saying you are a fucking mental case who doesn’t have the slightest idea what anybody on here is talking about because you are a crazed lackwit and care in the community escapee.

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