Where has this woman been this past five decades?

In this moment of brave truth telling and female empowerment, it’s time to address one topic that’s been missing far too long from our conversations around sex: female pleasure.

There is a large and thriving industry – has been for decades – talking about female sexual pleasure.

Shannon Bledsoe is the executive director of global non-profit organization WCG, which is partnering with actress and activist Jessica Biel to launch Trystnetwork.org, a sex positive online resource.

Just another competitor trying to get on the bandwagon then.

12 comments on “Where has this woman been this past five decades?

  1. Last week I saw a piece pondering, from the feminnisniismns angle, whether there was any hope that the patriarchy would ever countenance sex robots for women.

    The missus, a current-wave feminist herself, laughed heartily with me as she, like every women she knows, has had a drawer full of them by her bed since she was 17.

  2. In middle school sex ed classes, drawings of female anatomy often don’t even include the clitoris, as if women’s reproductive function is somehow separate from their pleasure.

    I hate to tell you baby, but women’s reproductive function *is* separate from their pleasure. That is the point about FGM. You can simply cut it all away and Somalis still reproduce. Stephen Jay Gould wrote an entire book chapter called something like Male Nipples and Female Ripples about how the clitoris was a curiosity with no obvious function like nipples on men. It is well known that most female mammals *can* enjoy sex but there is very little evidence that they do.

    Female pleasure remains taboo and poorly understood.

    Well can’t argue with the second part, but it is not taboo, it is just profoundly boring. Who cares? Does the world really need some more women wittering on about orgasms? Of course we have to pretend otherwise if we want to get laid.

    There is little scientific research on the topic and even doctors shy away from discussing it: according to a study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, less than 30% of gynecologists routinely ask their patients about pleasure and sexual satisfaction.

    There’s a MeToo moment waiting to happen. Maybe fewer than 30% of women go to their gynecologist to talk about something related to sex? I can see how they might want to exercise some discretion.

    While gay and straight men climax about 85% of the time during sex, women having sex with women orgasm about 75% of the time and women having sex with men come last at just 63%, research from the Kinsey Institute shows. The reasons for this “orgasm gap” are surely multifaceted, but we can start to address it by talking more about the importance of women’s pleasure.

    Is that an orgasm gap? The problem is looking at crude percentages. I would assume that lesbians rapidly suffer from the lesbian bed of death and so while they might orgasm 75% of the time, the last time it actually happened was when Martina Navratilova won Wimbledon. Normal women might orgasm much less but they probably have had sex in the last month.

    Knowing our own bodies can promote our own health and wellbeing, and empower our relationships. The Kinsey study showed that compared to women who orgasmed less frequently, women who experienced more pleasure were more likely to ask for what they want in bed, act out fantasies and praise their partner for something they did in bed, among other things.

    As usual there is an enormous gap between what they claim and what the evidence is. I am sure that it sounds very sensible for women to act out fantasies and ask for things they want, but that is not the same as promoting their well being or empowering their relationships. As anyone who has dated a girl with borderline personality disorder will be able to tell you.

    which is partnering with actress and activist Jessica Biel

    Ms Biel, who know wants to be known as Mrs Timberlake, is married to, obviously, Justin Timberlake. Who I always thought was Gay but apparently they have a child. On the other hand they did call him Silas Randall. So who knows? Either way if I were him I would be consulting a lawyer about now. This is not a sign of a happy marriage.

  3. Is it significant that they are illustrating this article with a picture of a Black male? And possibly a non-White woman?

    Are they trying to say something here?

  4. ‘In this moment of brave truth telling and female empowerment’

    A stupid lie. There is nothing brave about piling on. Fallacies of argumentum ad miserecordiam and argumentum ad populum.

    Women are not empowered by demands for empowerment, rather it is a declaration of dependence.

    Women will never stop playing on emotion.

  5. I’m not the prettiest boy on the block so surely I can’t be the only one who has found that women are randy little beasts and demanding with it. Men are simply not allowed to have headaches.

  6. So she’s entirely unaware of the existance of Cosmopolitan magazine then…

    Hey, those “How to get him to help you have monster orgasms!” articles touted on the front cover of each issue in real large letters are easy to miss.

  7. In this moment of brave truth telling and female empowerment, it’s time to address one topic that’s been missing far too long from our conversations around sex: female pleasure.

    Been there, done that, Shannon. In the real world it usually boils down to her saying something akin to “A little to the left, dear.”

  8. The Kinsey study… women who experienced more pleasure were more likely to ask for what they want…

    I think they are implying the causality backwards, no? Let alone the point made up-thread that there may or may not be any relationship between “asking for what you want (etc)” and any other desirable outcome.

  9. Is this woman out of her tiny mind? Formal sex-ed is carried out in the schools nowadays. The teachers in many of our schools, especially in the cities, are aware that some of their girls have been/ will be FGM’d in the school holidays. So should they be aiming to make these girls aware of their scope for orgasm before or after they have been robbed of it by their parents? And that no-one is going to stop them, because, well, you girls are brown, so hard luck?
    Not going to happen.

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