Umm, why?

“Broke men are hurting women’s marriage prospects,” the NY Post recently declared, citing a study from the Journal of Family and Marriage. The article claimed that “most American women hope to marry” but there is a shortage of men with stable incomes and lives, making it tough for women to do so.

Why is it necessary for the bloke to have a stable income before he’s marriageable. Unless, of course, it’s the stable income that’s being married?

Data confirms that more women have begun to realize that there are far worse things than dying alone, which is great news for women but bad news for the patriarchy.

Women marry incomes is bad news for the patriarchy?

34 comments on “Umm, why?

  1. A familiar feel-good trope for single women that have yet to partner up. She may be right. Growing old on your own, however, can be a challenging, and given she’s only recently hit 40 her attitude may well change. It could be Keli’s particular challenge has less to do with his being broke than assortative mating – the shortage of educated middle-class males within her ethnic group.

  2. Woman writes bollocks, comments closed.

    People remaining single and childless is a death knell for a society. Although if it is Western progressive liberal society, that death can’t come soon enough.

    The problem is that progressive liberals like to infect others with their poison and destroy the family for far more than themselves.

  3. “People remaining single and childless is a death knell for a society. Although if it is Western progressive liberal society, that death can’t come soon enough.”

    It isn’t. It just means that a bunch of manchildren (and womenchildren) are getting removed from the gene pool. The women who watch Sex and the City and think anyone really lives like that and then spend years trying to find that, instead of settling down with a bloke in Dagenham in her mid-20s.

    And this is a good thing.

  4. Actually not a bad piece from Keli. Marriage is a bargain and if you don’t like the terms don’t do it. and this linda hirschman seems to have hit one of the biggest nails on the head,

    “Linda Hirshman courted controversy by advising that marriage, unless to an exceptional man, is often a “bad bargain” for women. With every child a woman has, she sees her pay and long-term professional opportunities decline, particularly if she leaves the workforce for a significant period of time.”

    So if you value professional opportunities more than a family then go for it. And there’s plenty of role models not in the millennial gen, Theresa for example. On the other hand Margaret managed both high office and 2 kids, but perhaps even Keli and Linda would agree she was special, or maybe it was Dennis that was an exceptional man.

  5. I think it was Douglas Murray who said there will be many many women who are going to be very bitter because they are not getting the men they would like to. I assume that means that living with a soy-boy wuss metrosexual crusty lefty tree-hugger does not fulfill women’s traditional requirements in men and one day they will wake up and realise they have been fooled by the woke postmodern society.

  6. “On the other hand Margaret managed both high office and 2 kids”

    According to the final volume of Charles Moore’s biogrpahy, though, they pretty much never visited her in her old age.

  7. “they pretty much never visited her in her old age.”

    blimey that’s very sad, and another thing missing from Keli’s article; looking after Mummy impedes career opportunities.

  8. This does give a lot of power to those men who do have a stable income.

    Until they marry, at which point they have none at all, and that much of that ‘stable income’ can be transferred to the wife for life at her whim of divorce.

  9. “Linda Hirshman courted controversy by advising that marriage, unless to an exceptional man, is often a “bad bargain” for women. With every child a woman has, she sees her pay and long-term professional opportunities decline, particularly if she leaves the workforce for a significant period of time.”

    Don’t let family and happiness get in the way of that VP role in Marketing at Global WokeCorp.

  10. Eh, I’m actually on the wimmins side here.

    The purpose of marriage is to create a stable environment for the raising of kids, and part of that deal means providing for the missus. Ideally she shouldn’t have to work, looking after kiddies is a hard enough shift. Though stay-at-home Mums is a relatively recent luxury only made possible by the excess wealth of late-stage capitalism.

    Can’t do that if the husband is a part-time barista with $400K of college debt for his English Lit. degree.

    Even if they publicly subscribe to feminist boilerplate, most women grok this. Not many romance novels about girls being swept off their feet by call centre workers. Being well off is for men what a cracking set of tits is for women.

    How about these sour grapes tho:

    women have begun to realize that there are far worse things than dying alone, which is great news for women but bad news for the patriarchy.

    It’s true there are worse things than dying alone – losing a child, being afflicted by an aggressive strain of cancer, death by bongo-bongo… but being an unwanted and unloved cat lady is one of the crueler fates that can befall womankind. A life of pointless consumption, loveless hookups, and lonely death is no life at all – it’s more of a prison sentence.

    Does anyone know any ageing spinsters who seem genuinely happy? The sales figures for boxed wine and antidepressants want a word with you.

    marriage has historically presented women with two options, neither good: marry a man and sacrifice your autonomy and career goals to become financially dependent on him. Or marry a man and maintain your own career but be prepared to have a “second shift” career taking care of him and the home

    It’s interesting how feminism, which is a mutated bastard spawn of Marxism, nevertheless seeks to reduce the institution of the family to mere economic transactions.

    It’s certainly not obvious that being a wage slave provides more autonomy than being a wife and mother, and the feminist career myth is as as unobtainable to the vast majority of women (and men) as walking on the Moon. Most people have jobs, not careers, which they do out of necessity rather than a genuine passion for marketing dog toothbrushes or whatever.

    I increasingly think Chris Rock was right when, years ago, he joked that a lot of people marry just to have someone to go to dinner and the movies with.

    Is that so bad?

    Look, most men will never marry a nymphomaniac supermodel who loves making sandwiches. Most women will never marry a billionaire fireman-astronaut with Batman’s pecs who loves listening to their interminable chatter about essential oils.

    A “bad” marriage might be worse than loneliness, but most marriages probably aren’t that bad. Just varying degrees of disappointing and frustrating mixed in with the intimacy and joy, because it’s hard to live with people.

    Our ancestors were more practical about this stuff. They didn’t expect married life to be an extended courtship with hearts and flowers every day. They understood that the world is a cold place where it’s dangerous to go alone.

    “Take THAT, patriarchy!” exclaims the Twitter feminist as she settles in for another lonesome evening of binge-watching RU PAUL’S DRAG RACE and her biological clock ticks down to obsolescence. Sad.

  11. “Even if they publicly subscribe to feminist boilerplate, most women grok this. Not many romance novels about girls being swept off their feet by call centre workers. ”

    Thats akin to saying ‘Even if they publicly subscribe to honesty, most women steal from the charity box’. Its not acceptable to claim that what you want is x,y and z while deep down what you really want is a,b and c. Its called lying.

    When women are honest about what it is they want from life then maybe some sort of balance between the sexes can be achieved. As it is they are lying to themselves, and everyone else, and its causing massive societal problems.

  12. ‘… but there is a shortage of men with stable incomes…’

    Because gender equality means women are now doing, indeed awarded by positive action, the Long term, better paying jobs that the primary family earner (hubby) used to do. Thus the number of jobs paying enough so that when it’s start a family time, wifey can give up work and rely on hubby’s income to support non-working wife and newborn, has diminished, being done by women who want to give up work and start a family.

    Social engineering and the equality industry in action has a wonderful symmetry of consequence.

  13. Jim – When women are honest about what it is they want from life

    We’ll be able to ski to Hell.

    You want bluff masculine straightforwardness from*women*? Even Henry Higgins never managed it, and he had a PhD.

    A lot of today’s problems between the sexes boil down to mens and wimmins misunderstanding each other in the same way dogs and cats do, because they’re inadequately socialised in childhood and fed an diet of official lies about equality.

  14. Jussi,

    There’s a lot of feminists who aren’t really committed to being independent women. They really just want the goodies of independent women, without the sacrifices. Like they want to be CEO, but they also want flexible working, years of maternity leave.

    I’ve worked with some kick-ass women, and none of them go to “women in …” conferences. None of them whine about glass ceilings. Some of them earn more than their husbands because that’s the mindset of being independent.

    Lots of women are snobs. There’s plenty of builders out there who would like a wife. The builders end up marrying hairdressers because the middle class women won’t look at them.

  15. What largely goes unmentioned in all this is that there is an optimum time in life to partner up, and it is on the younger end of the spectrum, rather than the older. If women wait until they are in their mid-30s to search for a partner, they’ve lost out on about ten plus years of searching. They are way behind the curve, and unsurprisingly, many of the best men have already partnered up.

    Anyone who has reached their 40s knows this essential fact: When you run into someone (male or female) in their mid-to-late 30s or early 40s who is still single, there is usually a very good reason why they are still single, and that very good reason is usually something bad… Focus on career to the exclusion of all else, unrealistic expectations, personal instability, etc.

    Finding a mate is essentially shopping. The longer you wait, the less merchandise to choose from, and the greater the probability that the best merchandise has already been bought by someone else. You want the very best? Shop early.

  16. Dennis – Finding a mate is essentially shopping. The longer you wait, the less merchandise to choose from, and the greater the probability that the best merchandise has already been bought by someone else

    Yarp. Also, women are like sandwiches – far more marketable when you know 20 other random blokes haven’t jizzed on them.

  17. Steve – I kept wanting to laugh at your first comment but it’s like watching a sad clown hang himself.

  18. I’m reminded of this old joke

    THE HUSBAND STORE

    A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.

    You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch: you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

    So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband…

    On each floor the signs on the doors read:

    Floor 1 – These men have jobs.

    Floor 2 – These men have jobs and love kids.

    Floor 3 – These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking. “Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:

    Floor 4 – These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework. “Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it!” Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:

    Floor 5 – These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:

    Floor 6 – You are visitor 3,261,496,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

    THE WIFE STORE

    Floor 1 – has wives that love sex.

    Floor 2 – has wives that love sex and have money.

    The third through sixth floors have never been visited.

  19. With a bit of modification the shopping joke mirrors real life – certain qualities tend to improve at higher floors/older ages, eg income and maturity, yet if you wait one floor too many then “but are already married to someone else” gets appended to the tag.

  20. ‘Linda Hirshman courted controversy by advising that marriage, unless to an exceptional man, is often a “bad bargain” for women. With every child a woman has, she sees her pay and long-term professional opportunities decline’

    Isn’t that confusing the issue of marriage and the issue of having children?

    Anyway: would I be wrong to guess that the desire to have children more often comes from the wife than the husband?

  21. “The purpose of marriage is to create a stable environment for the raising of kids”

    You must be Catholic.

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