This isn’t quite what I would describe as “being a boozer”

‘I never really enjoyed drugs. The smoke made me paranoid and the cocaine made me feel like I was in a dentist’s office, with that terrible taste down the throat. I’m a boozer. Give me a vodka and a glass of wine at dinner and I’m fine.’

Sorta missing the rest of the bottle of vodka and the third bottle of wine to be a boozer, really, isn’t it?

No, not totally quite

Norwegian for the act of having a beer (pils) outside (ute). An outside beer. Seriously.

There’s a stronger association than that. It’s that first beer of the year that is had outside. Literally of course the translation is correct, but there’s that usage which allies with spring is sprung, de grass is riz, I wonder where de boidies is.

Perhaps in English, signifying the move from the snug to the beer garden time of year.

The considered view from the Czech public bar – Yes

Now a Cuban proposal to use its trademark rum as a substitute currency could send the Caribbean nation’s Cold-War era creditors singing yo-ho-ho all the way to the bank.

The Czech Finance Ministry says Cuban authorities have proposed to pay back £222 million lent to the island by Communist Czechoslovakia in instalments of the spirit.

Not just on the grounds that more rum is better, nor even that Cuban rum is pretty good. One more factor, what some call rum around here is actually a potato vodka coloured with caramel. Many things would be an improvement upon this.

Transatlantic flight attendant arrested for being eight times alcohol limit

Jeez, can you actually survive that level?

An flight attendant was arrested for being eight times the alcohol limit while on board a trans-Atlantic jet.

Officers smelled alcohol on the breath of American Airlines worker Stacy Rosehill, 57, while she was carrying out an in-flight safety demonstration ahead of a flight from Manchester to Chicago.

She was escorted off the Boeing 787 Dreamliner plane in October and taken into custody as around 300 passengers were waited for takeoff. Tests showed she had 71 microgrammes of alcohol in 100 millilitres of breath. The legal limit under aviation rules is 9mg.

Ah, different limit. She was actually legal to drive….that’s if I’ve read the microg bits right.

Tee hee

Tory MP ‘is quizzed by detectives over claims he sexually assaulted gay man after Eurovision party’
Ben Howlett, 30, accused of putting hands inside another man’s trousers
He allegedly then touched the man’s partner’s crotch in a Bath nightclub
Howlett, who is openly gay, was questioned under caution by detectives

No, not that. What appears to be something between a drunken fumble and a sexual assault. Rather, this:

A source said that Howelett, 30, the member for Bath, Somerset, was ‘very drunk’ at the time the offence was alleged to have happened.
The party is said to have been attended by around 30 people in one of the town’s most exclusive areas and they are said to have moved onto the Sub 13 cocktail bar.
But the attack happened in a local pub called The Common Room, where the revellers moved onto at around midnight, a source told The Sun.

So that place hasn’t changed much in 35 years then. The decor has but not the style. It’s where you go after getting pissed up somewhere else and are looking for a drunken fumble. Culture is persistent, isn’t it?

Beer contains calories? Who knew?

People in the UK and many other countries get more of their calories from alcohol than from sugary drinks like cola and lemonade, according to new data which suggests that tackling Britain’s drink problem may be more important for health than cracking down on sugar consumption.

Of 24 countries tracked by the data analysts Euromonitor International, all but one have higher daily calorie consumption from alcoholic drinks than sugary beverages. In the UK, adults are consuming more than 106 calories per head every day from alcoholic drinks, compared with 98 from sugar-sweetened drinks.

And therefore there must be labeling and a strategy to reduce consumption and so on.

The thing is that we already restrict alcohol consumption to adults. you know, those we judge competent to make up their own minds?

At which point the prodnoses can fuck off, can’t they?

And for added points we can note that if this is true of most countries then this is normal, isn’t it?

Booze cheap or cinema expensive?

Alcohol now so cheap 13 pints can be bought for price of cinema ticket

Looks like it’s cinema which is expensive:

Teenagers are able to buy more than 13 pints of cider for the price of a cinema ticket, according to a new report which says children are being put at risk by “pocket money prices.”

The study from the Alcohol Health Alliance says supermarkets are selling alcohol at prices that are attracting children and harmful drinkers, because of the absence of minimum prices.

The research found the cheapest alcohol being sold at 16 pence per unit – far below a 50 pence limit which was debated, before being shelved by the Coalition Government.

Consumers could buy two and a half bottles of the cheapest white cider – Frosty Jacks – containing more than 13 pints for the standard £8.24 paid for an off-peak cinema tickets, the study found.

And what’s this about teenagers? Got to be 18 to buy cider don’t you?

Freed from the yoke of Europe!

Mr Berry said he had “fantasised about the return of the pint” of champagne for decades. He added that “now we are no longer beholden to Brussels” and could “drink our champagne from God’s own bottle size”.

A pint of champagne was “such a perfect sized bottle,” he said. “You get four proper sized glasses from it – as opposed to six from a bottle, or three from a half-bottle.

“Champagne is designed to be shared, preferably with one other person. Six glasses between two is – if you’re carrying on to another bottle with dinner – too much.

“However three glasses are certainly too little to share between two people – one for me, one for you, and a dribble for us both to finish with?

And why the fuck not, eh?

Action this day.

‘Ang on a minute

I mean, everyone’s got one, right? Er, wrong. I’m 45, gainfully employed and have never been a homeowner.

In fact, I’ve just never been rich enough – at least not to buy myself a flat in London. Mine is a situation for which I take full responsibility: ten years teaching and researching at university was good for the mind, but unhelpful to the bank balance.

Hannah Betts?

Isn’t this the bird who just told us a few months back that she was sober for the first time in 20 years?

And we’re not talking about american style alcoholism but proper “Jeebus God, what happened the last two days?” stuff?

For, increasingly, there were things I did not love. The “scrapes” I got into in my 20s were less amusing in my 40s; moments in which I injured myself, alienated friends, and subjected myself to dismal humiliation. The “lost time” (never “blackouts”) that startled me in my early 30s became my routine way of getting home. And I was tired – stultifyingly, deadeningly tired.

“Alcoholic didn’t buy house” isn’t much of a story, is it?

Prohibition works so well, doesn’t it?

Bihar, where prohibition is in force, suffered a shock when three persons died after consuming spurious alcohol near Patna and seven boozers were arrested from a posh hotel in the State capital.

According to police, three friends consumed spurious liquor in the Rakabganj area near Patna on Tuesday night and when their condition deteriorated they were admitted to a local hospital where they died.

Tuna flavoured beer!

Why not combine two male enjoyments into one product?

A Polish company has set up a crowd-funding page to raise money for a new brand of beer which it claims will be made with bacteria taken from a woman’s vagina.
The Order of Yoni – which takes its name from the Sanskrit word for vagina – is asking for £118,000 (150,000 Euros) to launch ‘Bottled Instinct’, a drink which contains the ‘quintessence of femininity’.
A post on crowd-sourcing website Indie Go Go claims the beer will be made from the ‘lactic acid bacteria’ of Czech model Alexandra Brendlova, who appears in the adverts in negligee.

Slightly weirdly I know someone who has dated Brendlova. No, no news on how the beer will taste, sorry.

The idiots are after JK Rowling now

Dr. Adrienne Keene ‎@NativeApprops
You can’t just claim and take a living tradition of a marginalized people. That’s straight up colonialism/appropriation @jk_rowling.

Fuck off you ignorant tosser. She’s telling a story. And previous stories have been used to do this ever since we first started telling stories.

Well, yes, obviously

The figures, the first since the official Government-recommended drinking limits were amended, show that around 2.5 million people in mainland Britain exceed the new weekly levels in a single session.

Overall nine per cent – equivalent to 2.5 million adults across England, Scotland and Wales – admit to consuming more than 14 units of alcohol on their heaviest drinking day of a typical week.

If you lower the limits then more people will breach them. And 14 units is only 5 or 6 pints of reasonable beer. Otherwise known as ” a bevvy”.

Here’s a target to aim for

A recently-deceased 107-year-old Spanish attributed his long-life to drinking four bottles of wine each day and never drinking water.

Antonio Docampo García, who died last week in Vigo, northwestern Spain, said he only imbibed his own homemade red wine.

Mr Docampo would drink two bottles of red wine with his lunch and another two with dinner.

Pretty damn good actually but I have to say that I might prefer a life where I can remember more than just noon each day.

I do love, I do

Do as I do, think about cancer before you have a glass of wine, says chief medical officer
Dame Sally Davies urges the public to follow her example, and think about the risks of cancer before deciding whether a glass of wine is worth it

Like most 50ish males I’m odds on to get some form of cancer before I snuff it, even if it’s mild prostate and I snuff of something else.

A glass or two of wine helps to come to terms with the human condition.

Isn’t this just amazing?

The alcohol industry makes most of its money – an estimated £23.7bn in sales in England alone – from people whose drinking is destroying or risking their health, say experts who accuse the industry of irresponsible pricing and marketing.

While the industry points to the fact that most people in the country are moderate drinkers, 60% of alcohol sales are either to those who are risking their health, or those – labelled harmful drinkers – who are doing themselves potentially lethal damage, figures seen by the Guardian show.

Well, yes, obviously really.

Of the 69%, he said, 38% was consumed by “hazardous” or “increasing risk” drinkers who exceed the old guidelines of 14 units a week for women and 21 for men (these have recently come down to 14 units each, with some alcohol-free days), either by bingeing or regular drinking. The rest was consumed by harmful drinkers on more than 50 units a week for men or 35 for women, whose addiction might lead to liver problems including cirrhosis. Public Health England estimates that 10.8 million people drink at risky levels and 1.6 million may have some level of dependence on alcohol.

To summarise, people who drink more make up more of the sales of the industry than people who drink less.

Amazing what science can tell us really.