What a glorious country where the Court of Appeal considers the matter of whether the filming of a man\’s naked chest is voyerism in the same manner that that of a woman\’s is.

It is perfectly legal to ogle a man\’s chest but not a woman\’s breasts, according to an unusual ruling on what constitutes voyeurism by a panel of leading judges at the Court of Appeal yesterday.

Only women\’s breasts can be regarded as "private parts", whereas the male chest – even if the male in question has man breasts, or "moobs" as they are known – cannot, the judges say.

The mills of the law may grind slowly but most assuredly they grind small.

Two further things occur to me: the first links with a (possibly apocryphal) case in the US where two naked women joggers argued successfully that in jogging naked they were not in fact guitly of (whatever the charge was, flashing? Obscene exposure?) for the details of the charge stated that genitalia must be exposed. Since womens\’ genitalia are internal, they were not exposed and thus no offence committed.

The other is to ask, what exactly are "private parts" for that is what our current UK law states. It\’s not just genitalia, as womens\’ breasts, while they are many delightful things, are not in fact those. What if that definition is in fact secondary sexual characteristics? I think that we\’d all accept that ogling would include staring at a woman\’s bum, the shape of which is indeed such a secondary sexual characteristic (the placement of adipose tissue making it so).

Which would lead to something of an interesting situation: the prime male secondary sexual characteristic is facial hair: so does staring at a man\’s beard now constitute ogling? A second such male characteristic is male alopecia: is staring at baldies now a crime?

Just what is the definition of "private parts" then?

No, Not a Surprise

About 19% of men admitted they were potential gold-diggers and would tie the knot with someone in order to benefit from their wealth and luxury lifestyle, compared with only 11% of women.

Pretty much a staple of a certain sort of historical novel (that is, those written back in history, not those set in history) isn\’t it, the pursuit of an heiress?

Men Going Off Sex

Seems that the British male is less interested in bonking his partner than in the past. As to possible explanations:

Cooper, who is professor of organisational psychology and health at Lancaster University, also blamed Britain\’s culture of long working hours. \’Britain\’s work culture has gone from 9 to 5 to extremely long hours, which makes for a very stressful life,\’ he said. \’Stress can be cumulative, which means eventually people can find it impossible to switch off and relax.\’

I think we can put that to one side. Average working hours have been declining for men for more than a century. You know, this evidence thing….

Royal Gay Sex Scandal

So the perpetrators of this blackmail plot about the royal gay sex scandal have been found guilty and sentenced to five years each. No, I still can\’t say who it was all about but that is easy enough to find out.

What everyone is really interested in of course is whether the allegations were true, not whether they were being used for blackmail purposes: both thing that are true and those that are untrue can be used to extort.

Recall that the evidence as such was film of a servant alledging:

The tapes claimed that the married member of the royal family, witness A, performed a sex act on the male aide at a party and took cocaine with him.

So, film of someone boasting that such and such had happened. Was it actually true?

Strachan, 31, and McGuigan, 41, used the tapes to demand money from A, but in court they have admitted that the gay sex allegations were untrue in their mind.

The convicts don\’t think so. But, then, should we take the word of convicted criminals?

The truth is, we don\’t know the veracity of the allegations at all. What fun, eh?


Deborah Jean Palfrey

Oh Aye?

Police in Tarpon Springs, Florida, said the body of Deborah Jeane Palfrey, 52, was discovered in a storage shed near the mobile home of her mother, Blanche, where she had been staying while awaiting a jail sentence. Officers confirmed that a handwritten note was found with the body and that foul play was not suspected.

Palfrey, who became known as the "DC Madam", was convicted last month of money laundering, using the mail for illegal purposes and racketeering.

She faced a maximum of 55 years in prison but was freed by the court pending sentencing in July.

The problem for conspiracy theorists here is that she had already released the notes of who hadd been using her prostitution service. So there\’s no motive for the foul play…..maybe.


Gordon was friendly – at least until I explained my mission.

"Make up with Peter?" he hissed in an angry whisper.

Then, as his voice gradually rose from dispatch-box volume to a near shout, he exclaimed: "Peter? He\’s been going around telling everyone that I\’m gay! And I am NOT GAY!"

It\’s not actually something to worry about any more, you know?

Umm, Folks?

Look, he\’s gone from the political scene (Hurrah!):

In her conversations with investigators, the new informant told how the former governor was fond of using sex toys to enhance his own pleasure.

She also gave further details as to his specific sexual fetishes in graphic detail, "divulging that he a penchant for props," the Post reports.

The woman also added that he liked to keep his socks on during sex – something alleged previously by Republican operative Roger Stone.

Can we just count coup and leave the salacious details out of it? No, I really don\’t want to know which sex toys nor how they were employed.

Why Men Make More Money

It\’s not actually as if this is a surprise, of course:

Money doesn\’t make the world go round: it\’s testosterone. The more that traders have, the richer they\’ll become – up to a point.

John Coates, who used to manage a trading floor at Deutsche Bank on Wall Street but is now at the Judge Business School at Cambridge University, and Professor Joe Herbert, a neuroscientist, set out to study the brains of City traders to discover what makes them tick.

They measured levels of testosterone and cortisol (a stress hormone) in 17 traders at a City of London bank for eight consecutive business days. They found that those traders with higher testosterone levels in the morning were most likely to make money on the day\’s trading. One trader hit a six-day "winning streak" during which he made more than double his daily profit. During that time his testosterone levels went up 74%.

This free market/capitalism thing, it does indeed reward judicious risk taking. And yes indeed, testosterone is what makes men more likely to take risks (judicious or not). Thus we have an economic system which rewards part of the male set up.

It is also, of course, possible to create an economic system which does not reward such risk taking, and thus does not privilege males simply for their hormonal make up. But is the absence of advance (which is the corollary of the absence of risk taking) worth the greater gender equality?



while hedgehogs are into girl-on-girl cunnulingulus.

Wow! Umm, and just what is the cunnulingulus of which the Good Professor speaks? A google search provides four entries, two the rather strange online handle of a game player, this article itself (and this blog post will presumably follow at some point) and the Great Peter Briffa commenting upon the same piece.

Dogs do it,
Frogs do it,
Even horny hedgehogs do it,


Froggie Sex Machines

A startling revelation: the Frogs are trying to spice up their sex lives and in doing so they\’re buying up British designed sex toys.

One possible explanation is that the Brits (as George Mikes pointed out, the Continentals have sex lives, the British have hot water bottles) needed technological assistance and thus developed the technology to aid them. Necessity being the Mother of Invention and all that.

Another is that the Frogs have rather changed the nature of their relationships in recent years. Anecdotally at least, the normal method of dealing with a boring sex life there was to take another partner, wasn\’t it?

Or possibly both are true, the latter change meaning they are now taking advantage of the British Industrial Revolution and lead in technology.


Gayers in the Westminster Village

From Ian Dale\’s survey of sexuality in politics:

All this does seem to prove that political parties do attract more gay people, proportionately, than other areas of society. This is especially true among activists, I think. One or two people in previous threads have had a go at explaining this phenomenon, but I don\’ think any of them have done so very successfully.

Easy peasy.

Politics is showbusiness for ugly people. Showbusiness has a similarly high rate of gayers.

All that\’s left is to work out whether Iain actually tried on the stage or had enough self-knowledge to know that politics it was going to have to be.



Lindsay Lohan

I came across the same phenomenon when researching an article on Sienna Miller: the 18th-century idea that young actresses are little different to common prostitutes is alive and thriving through 21st-century technology.

Umm, no, not quite. There is indeed a certain level of young actresses who are so thought of but they are referred to more often as a MAW (Model, Actress, Whatever). The W part being the clue. Ashley Dupree being an example, although the lower levels of B movies and so on are full of this sort of personnel.

Not What I Expected

Seeing this story:

The founder of a website which sold sperm to lesbians who wanted children has been jailed for 16 months for fraud and forgery.

I thought, Aha! He\’s been doing what that American doctor used to do. When asked for a sample to impregnate a woman he would run through the catalogue, agree, yes, yes, this blonde 6\’4\’\’ Aryan type would be just right for you, right, I\’ll just go and get it for you. He would then return a few minutes later from the store room slightly flushed and red faced with a more personal sample which was then used.

Lot\’s of to be 5\’5\’\’ frogfaced (for the Good Doctor was not blessed in the looks department) children were thus produced.

But, sadly, no, the story turns on simple accountancy.

American scandals can be so much more fun…



On being asked to comment on the idea that the 28 year old mistress of the 66 year old Czech President is pregnant the spokesman said:

I am a civil servant and not a valet.


Not Everything Gets Worse You Know

Despite my gloom and regular jeremiads, it is true that life and society, in oh so many ways, do get better over time.

(I was one of those surveyed, by the way. YouGov, here’s a hint for free – we have civil partnerships now, we can’t get sacked for being gay, heck, we can even serve in the army, so you really don’t need to preface the question with “Some people might think the following questions to be of a personal nature”. We’re grown-ups, and we can cope with you just asking which team we bat for).

Only just over 50 years ago….

Nazi-Style Sex Orgy

Sounds, erm, different:

Max Mosley, one of the most powerful men in world sport, was under pressure to resign as boss of Formula One’s governing body last night after he was exposed enjoying a Nazi-style orgy with five prostitutes.

Jewish groups condemned the behaviour of Mosley, 67, whose father, Sir Oswald, was the leader of the British Union of Fascists and a friend of Adolf Hitler.

Mr Mosley was caught on video by the News of the World with five women in an underground “torture chamber” in Chelsea, where he spent several hours allegedly indulging in sado-masochistic sex.

Then again, as PJ O\’Rouke has pointed out, absolutely no one has ever fantasised about being tied up and ravished by a liberal.

Eliot Spitzer


“It is also my client’s understanding from the same source that Gov Spitzer did not remove his mid-calf-length black socks during the sex act."

Not exactly high style, is it?

So, Umm…

The Singapore government is offering students lessons in seduction in an attempt to boost the city state\’s flagging birth rates.

Are they looking for examiners for the practicals, do you think?