Q: "Do my bosons give you a hadron?"

A: I wouldn\’t mind computing the rotation coefficients of that symmetric bilinear pairing.

Badaboom tish. Some of the others are actually quite good.

Q: "Do my bosons give you a hadron?"

A: I wouldn\’t mind computing the rotation coefficients of that symmetric bilinear pairing.

Badaboom tish. Some of the others are actually quite good.

“Some of the others are actually quite good.”

True only for small values of “good”.

I like the similar one (about a different specialty) where the two psychiatrists are riding in an elevator.

The elevator stops, a man gets on, greeting the two occupants, “Good morning.” After he gets off a couple of floors up, one turns to the other and asks, “I wonder what he meant by that?”

There are some absolute belters on this thread.

There once was a young man named Fisk

Whose fencing was exceedingly brisk.

So swift was his action,

The Fitzgerald contraction

Reduced his rapier to a disk.

Said Einstein, “I have an equation

Which science might term Rabelaisian.

If “P” be virginity approaching infinity,

Let “U” be a constant persuasion.

Now, if “P” over “U” be inverted

And the root of “U” be inserted

“X” times into “P,” the result, QED,

Is a relative,” Einstein asserted.

A fair young thing from Nagasaki

Had a torrid affair with a blackie.

The results of her sins

Were quadruplets (not twins):

One black, one white, and two khaki.

Above from “One, Two, Three…Infinity” (by

Gamov, c. 1957).

And, of course, there’s the old one about the three constipated mathematicians.

The first attacked the problem with a pencil and some paper.

The second worked it out with his slide rule.

And the last one used logs.

And, while we’re at it, why leave out the pseudo side of scientific?

Two lovely young lasses—twa(t) Scotchess

Lay by yon bonny bank o’ Loch Ness.

The monster’s head appeared but was ignored

Because both, grown quite bored,

Had sunk their heads in each other’s crotches.

BIG BANG THEORY

If the Large Hard-On Collider

is supposed to recreate the big bang

involving every one of us,

how come I didn’t feel the earth move ?

Alan McAlpine Douglas