Meanwhile gap-toothed television viewers across America\’s Deep South have expressed relief that Woods has finally started acting like a proper black man.

Alabama grits farmer Roy Hobbs said: \”I was gittin\’ real confused and fearful for a times back there. What with his impeccable manners and white man\’s speakin\’ voice, I was thinkin\’ maybes ma TV was on the fritz.

\”But then he done wrecks his pimped-up Cadillac, cheats on his little white babymomma and runs away from the po-lice.

\”That sumbitch is black and all is right with my world again. Praise Jesus.\”

Daily Mash.

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