Britain set to sizzle on hottest day since September

Breaking news.

After over a century and a half of research the Met Office (formed, 1854) is able to reveal the secret of the British weather system. Far from the common conception of it as a capricious Goddess who must be propitiated with a complex series of manouvres involving kagoules, umbrellas and the ritual incantations of Church members (\”turned out nice again\”, \”brass monkeys\” and the mystifying to the unbaptised \”cats and dogs\”) there is in fact an underlying order. A cycle which, for an as yet undetermined reason, lasts roughly 12 months and involves the temperature gradually getting warmer for some months, levelling off, cooling, levelling off, warming again and so on.

Summer is warmer than winter.

The Met Office costs taxpayers £82.3 million a year.

3 thoughts on “Britain set to sizzle on hottest day since September”

  1. Do people in England really think 26 C is ‘sizzling’? Right now, 1:18 MST, in Phoenix, AZ the temperature is 35 C. And this year is abnormally cool; usually it’s 40 C or higher by now.

  2. That’s sizzling enough thanx.

    We like it temperate. We aren’t due to take our cardigans off for another two weeks.

  3. Yes, ZT, it really is astounding to think that I was born in a country where the astoundingly comfortable temperature in my bedroom of 28 °C at 1.45 in the morning is considered ‘sizzling’. Mind you, it does mean I can sleep on top of the sheets rather than under them, which is much healthier, and 24/7 nakedness is truly the innovation that the Internet – and no sightlines through the window – engendered (let your bits dangle free, people!)

    Yeah, too much information, I know.

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