Defending Stephen Fry

Not that he needs defending by me of course.

But this thing that female sexuality is a little different from male, that if said sexuality were in fact the same then we\’d be seeing female cottagers on Hampstead Heath.

Umm, it\’s not actually that different from Robert Heinlein\’s comment, that only on Earth could we have a shortage of what every woman has an infinite supply of.

It\’s not that different from the common (in both senses) observation that women use sex to get what they want and men don\’t: for what men want is sex.

As a heterosexual male I feel entirely confident in making all three of those statements.

As a married man I just hope my wife doesn\’t read them.

8 thoughts on “Defending Stephen Fry”

  1. Saturday night I had a bad asthma attack, MrsBud, who’d been away for two weeks and was feeling frisky, was still quite keen to proceed despite my uncontrolled coughing. I think only the thought that if I croaked what would she do Sunday, Monday, etc., finally persuaded her to put the humidifier on and leave me alone.

  2. It’s been a commonplace for decades that the main driver between the number of sexual partners that straight men have vs. gay men is really rather readily explicable by what one would expect to happen if you point a male libido at another male libido. That there’s any controversy in this is why so much of the social sciences appear so silly to those with a lick of commonsense. As Tim’s tagline intimates, the set of things in the soft disciplines that are simultaneously true and not banal is small.

  3. I recall an American comedian on TV many years ago observing that women like to think they get horny; they think that they get the urge; they really feel the need to do it.
    But, he added, when they’re at their horniest gagging-for-it maximum, they’re like us blokes when we’re not even thinking about it.

    Truth to tell, if women had the same sex drive as men we’d still be living in caves, fucking.

    Media whore Germaine Greer once expressed pity for men living in this state. But why? Surely without it, it must be like being dead.

  4. In my experience, which is large and varied, the vast majority of women are absolutely besotted by sex. If you guys aren’t getting that reaction, you’re doing it wrong.

  5. I’m not really on Timmy’s or Stephen’s wavelength here, women seem to love sex.

    Gay men can’t get pregnant. I don’t want to get all neoclassical here, but the opportunity cost of sex is much much higher if there is a chance that something utterly life changing (/creating) will result from it.

    If gay men could get pregnant I predict there would be less cottaging even if their libido stayed the same.

    There is also the fact that some people see sex as a little more than the old in out in out, emotions and stuff like cuddling. That women want sex differently doesn’t mean they don’t want sex.

    “Truth to tell, if women had the same sex drive as men we’d still be living in caves, fucking.”

    That is funny though.

  6. “if said sexuality were in fact the same then we’d be seeing female cottagers on Hampstead Heath.”

    Well women don’t cottage exactly like that, they just do it in a more discreet way with one-night-stands, and sometimes 1/2 and also 1/4… 1/8th nightstands.

    Besides that, there are plenty of gay men who don’t cottage, not everyone has the frog gene when it comes to sex…


    Ps.: Stephen Fry is the freak here for whom cottaging is normal male behaviour… not anyone else. Yuck.

  7. The difference between how much women and men want sex isn’t as large as the difference between how many different sexual partners they want.

    ” Calvin Coolidge and his wife allegedly visited a poultry farm. During the tour, Mrs. Coolidge inquired of the farmer how his farm managed to produce so many fertile eggs with such a small number of roosters. The farmer proudly explained that his roosters performed their duty dozens of times each day.
    “Tell that to Mr. Coolidge,” pointedly replied the First Lady.
    The President, overhearing the remark, asked the farmer, “Does each rooster service the same hen each time?”
    “No,” replied the farmer, “there are many hens for each rooster.”
    “Tell that to Mrs. Coolidge,” replied the President.”

    If there isn’t a difference, like some people in the comments here claim, then prostitution trends should be explained.

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