Poncey Foreign Muck

Yesterday I cooked something that rocked my world so much, I thought I\’d share it on my blog and who knows, it may become a occasional feature. Since it\’s aimed a blokes or the kitchen-impaired (like me) the kind of food I\’ll do will be quite simple and much more aimed at taste than looks.

Because I was hungry, I used the following:

1 cabbage, sliced into strips
2 small tubs of cubed bacon (available in the \”cold meats\” section of most supermarkets – Tesco and Sainsbury\’s do two small tubs in a blister pack). Scrag ends from the slicing machine at the deli or market are better.
1 onion, finely sliced
Bit of rich cheddar, grated
A pinch of coarse ground black pepper

You don\’t need oil or butter because the bacon produces prodigious amounts of fat.

Warm a pan to a low heat (I turn the gas down as low as I can) and pour in the bacon. It should start to sizzle and release the fat. As soon as there is \”enough\” oil in the pan, add the onion.

Stir occasionally until the bacon just starts to show odd bits of browning.

It\’s very important NOT to let the bacon cook too far before you start adding other ingredients, or it will become very crunchy. But if you\’ve the bigger offcuts, cook more than small cubes.

Add in the cabbage and move everything around so that the cabbage is in contact with the pan. It\’s a bit fiddly, but worth it.

Make sure that the white surfaces of the cabbage all get a bit of golden brown on them.

When the cabbage looks mostly golden,  add the cheddar to the pan. Crank the heat right up and stir for about a minute. as soon as the cheese starts to show signs of melting, take the pan off the heat (and turn the stove off!) and throw the whole shebang into a colander to drain off the fat.

Pour it straight out of the colander onto a plate, sprinkle with a pinch of pepper and tuck in. Not very pretty, but it tasted fucking epic!

Pah, I spit on Obo\’s fancy foreign muck! Cabbage\’n\’bacon, can\’t beat it.

 

Update: Guys, in the comments, please do go read Obo\’s original. It\’ll all make much more sense that way.

18 thoughts on “Poncey Foreign Muck”

  1. Will try when I get the chance: does sound rather pleasant for when I’m looking after the kids. And I can tell the veggie wife I’m getting cabbage into them!

  2. Sound similar to a Polish dish I had back when about the only things to eat in Poland seemed to be cabbages, pig ‘n spuds. Delicious.

    If we’re doing recipes:
    *Soupe d’oignon a l’anglais*
    The basis is your standard French onion soup.
    Start with a load of onions. The bigg’ns are best but it doesn’t really matter. Top & tail but you don’t have to remove all of the skin unless you’re using lots of small ones. Rough slice. 1/4″‘ is about right.
    Tip them onto a tablespoon of melted pork fat in a big saucepan. (The French one with the two handle’s called a marmite. Ring a bell?) Saute (fry) stirring regularly over a low heat. The ideas to get the onions to go transparent without browning too much. If you couldn’t get all the onions in at first keep adding. What you’re aiming for is a sort of onion goo coloured pale brown. Time to add some sugar, brown’s favourite at about dessert spoon per pound of onions. Saute gently a little longer till the onions go browner. Salt & black pepper to taste. Time for the liquids. Your French housewife’d have beef stock about as a matter of course but Maggi stock cubes 2 to the pint’ll do. Even better’s Campbells consomme. Make up the fluid with beer. As I do this in Flanders it’s Leffe. You should aim for a liquid that about 1/2 onions. Simmer gently for as long as you fancy. Longer’s better but make up the liquid with more beer as required.
    To serve:
    Cubed bread grilled lightly.
    Grated cheese.
    The anglais ingredient: Streaky bacon gently grilled till it goes really pae & crunchy then crushed.
    Ladle the soup into the bowls. Chuck the bread cubes on the top a a good layer of cheese on top of that. Grill till the cheese is browning & bubbling & lastly sprinkle the crushed crispy bacon on top.
    Attack with caution. Incandescent cheese can give the unwary mouth third degree burns.
    Might even be doing this myself next month if I get north for the Braderie & the moules frites.

  3. Add a glass of wine and you’ve got choucroute cru!

    Enjoy and persist. Even Adam Smith noted the virtues of those of us who have our labour divided into repetitive tasks gaining some of the stimulation lost to division of labour by reinventing the wheel in our spare time.

  4. Philip Scott Thomas

    Sounds good, Tim.

    My South Australian exe used to make something sort of similar. No cheese, but a bit of vinegar and a bit of sugar. She called it Norrkraut or Knorkraut or some such. Unfortunately I never got a proper recipe, and haven’t been able to find a recipe on-line.

  5. Kale + lardons done in a somewhat similar fashion is a Dutch dish called boerenkool, with the addition of potatoes and without the cheese. Or you can use smoked sausage.

  6. Quite close to Colcannon… – fry the bacon cabbage and onion (or a leek for a change) in butter and fry in parboiled, unpeeled, quartered spuds roughly crushed for the last 10 min – salt and pepper well – feast fit for a king (and instant hardened arteries)

  7. Make toast. Butter it, BUT ONLY ON ONE SIDE. Apply sardines. Stick under grill.

    Note the voice of experience there.

  8. Tim, try the following:

    Good ciabatta roll
    Spicy salami
    Swiss cheese

    Cut ciabatta roll in half. Stick cheese in roll. Stick salami in roll. Enclose the roll tightly.

    Stick enclosed roll in panini press.

    Eat.

    P.S.: I might try it with sausage rolls at some point.

  9. Good grief man.
    Buy a copy of “Deliah” and obey her every command – you’ll have a great time and you’ll eat well.

  10. Boerenkool sounds suspiciously like Bauernkohl, which my German mother used to feed us when we were poor. Green sludge, spuds and sausage.

    I believe I will order Pizza.

  11. fred, boerenkoool is what my Dutch mates call this dish (not just the kale) when I’ve been in Amsterdam. If you google it, you’ll find any number of recipes that call it just that. The stamppot bit’s understood.

    Anyway, bacon + cabbage is a winner every time. I make a pot-roast with a smoked loin joint and savoy cabbage that is pure comfort food. Really anything with bacon is good, even Obo’s courgettes no doubt.

  12. Mmmm! You might try a adding bit of cumin to that, during the cabbage-frying process.

    And a beer to go with it all, but a cold weather dish, surely…?

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