# So how do you make 150 tonnes of toast?

Overnight, by a motorway?

A cleanup operation is under way after a tanker carrying more than 20 tonnes of yeast extract – believed to be Marmite – overturned on a busy motorway.

Average serving of Marmite, 4 grammes, so 250,000 servings to the tonne. Average weight of slice of bread, around 30 grammes, so 7.5 tonnes toast per tonne Marmite or 150 tonnes of toast needed overall.

And for extra marks, how many soft boiled eggs will you need to dip the Marmite soldiers in?

Umm, is this close enough to hte new maths to make it into a GCSE paper?

## 13 thoughts on “So how do you make 150 tonnes of toast?”

1. 150 tonnes = 150,000,000 grams of toast divided by 30 g per slice gives 5,000,000 slices of toast.

Assuming your soldiers are 1/5 the width of a slice of toast that makes 25,000,000 soldiers.

Further assuming we will be able to obtain a return ratio of 8:1 soldiers to egg (ie, 8 dips per egg) that means that 25,000,000 / 8 equals 3,125,000 eggs are required.

In other words a whole lotta chickens.

Well they did use the Andrew Sachs / Brand / Ross recording, so I suppose Eggs, toast and marmite would more than qualify.

2. A lorry load of wigs just turned over too. Police are combing the area.

3. “…is this close enough to hte new maths to make it into a GCSE paper?”

Only if you can find a way to work in something about the social cost of private road transportation or its effect on the environment…

4. And for extra marks, how many soft boiled eggs will you need to dip the Marmite soldiers in?

This is a trick question as no-one in their right mind would dip Marmite soldiers in soft boiled eggs.

5. Did it happen on the yeast-bound carriageway….?

6. Lorry-load of strawberries overturned on the M25. Causing a big jam.

7. ah-ha ukliberty, caught you out as a spy, if you were really one of us then you would not hold yourself to ridicule with such as “no-one in their right mind would dip Marmite soldiers in soft boiled eggs.” – so, we know you are a foreign spy, are you dutchman or a frenchman?

8. I’m not sure whether I love this story, or hate it

9. New maths? You cannot be serious.

New maths would not involve anything as difficult as elementary arithmetic.