So who has been bonking in New York then?

A married British rock star is facing demands from a the mother of a US love child that he has tried to keep secret.

The mother demanded £2million and child support but friends say that he refused the request.

The singer cannot be named for legal reasons and is thought to be desperate to keep the news a secret.

It\’s not Robbie Williams, any of the One Direction crew, or Seal, as none of them are (currently) married. Out at the Lemmy end of the spectrum no one would actually care.

It\’s got to be someone sufficiently whitebread to be married to someone who actually expects fidelity. Got to be someone dumb enough to have a one nighter without condoms. Someone successful enough to be worth trying to take for millions in child support. And popular enough that they get repeated air play.

So, major band and someone whose been around for some time.

I know who I think it is but I ain\’t sayin\’ on legal grounds.

32 thoughts on “So who has been bonking in New York then?”

  1. My guess is someone who doesn’t help ladies out in the supermarket by reaching things down from the top shelf.

  2. @DocBud – might it be the one Viz comic refers to as “the little twat with a big heart”?

  3. I thought Robbie Williams was still married to Ayda Field. Not that I’m guessing it’s him, just correcting the error.

  4. Philip Scott Thomas

    Is it significant that the Mail chose two stock photos of guys with acoustic guitars, while the Sun article, which the Mail references, also posed a model with an acoustic guitar?

  5. @DocBud.

    “Let’s not get too close to the edge”

    Why? Because it’s fragile? Just a tale from a topographic ocean? Perhaps you don’t want to be a relayer of bad news or have someone throw tormatos at you?

  6. “the little twat with a big heart” doesn’t fit the definition because as well as being named after a leading brand of dog food he’s Irish (born in Dublin).

    Personally I think it’s Paul Gadd aka Gary Glitter. If this gets out his reputation will be ruined.

  7. @John Galt,

    Elton John. That really would ruin his reputation.

    And before the pendants turn up, it’s already colloquial to refer to a civil partnership as a marriage.

  8. By the way, if you were a lady looking for a once-off shag with a rock star at the right time of the month, it would surely be economically rational to claim to be taking care of the contraception side of things.

  9. Why are we all joking about extortion under the Jemima Crow Laws?

    “She’s now set for life”, gloats the article, thus admitting (though apparently nobody cares) that “child support” in such cases is really a means for a woman to enrich herself at the literal expense of a productive male. Some useful reforms might be-

    a) Cap “child support” at a level sufficient to just keep a child above the poverty line.

    b) Make women legally responsible for their own contraception. If a woman has willingly engaged in sexual intercourse without either using her own contraceptive method, or knowingly when the man is unbagged, and without the man’s consent for pregnancy, she should have no child support entitlements, and instead gain only a minimal stipend (see (a) above) from the State, preferably payable in vouchers, food stamps, etc.

  10. A Mail online photo depicts someone playing a bass guitar (four string screws showing on one side and I don’t think they make 8 string guitars so there would be no screws on the other side). Perhaps this is relevant and perhaps not (you know how sneaky newspapers are). Lemmy, mentioned above, is a bassist and so is McCartney, both of whom spend a lot of time in New York. At least we know it’s not David Beckham – the only thing he can play is a toy train set!

  11. Lemmy isn’t married. And if he were, I doubt any such wife would expect fidelity, let alone be surprised at the absence of it.

    Bear in mind also that this is the Daily Fail, so “rock star” probably means some limp popster. Probably with a “bikini body” wife. It’ll be somebody that Mumsnet Woman has heard of, which leaves me baffled by the prog rock noodler references above.

  12. “…because as well as being named after a leading brand of dog food…”

    Well, I must not be well up on the latest music scene, as I can’t think of any pop star called Winalot…

  13. That Yes concert was the biggest pile of self indulgent wankery imaginable. God knows why so many people paid good money to listen to that. I can only assume the drugs were particularly good in the 70s.

  14. I reckon it has to be someone with an equally high profile wife, presumably someone who has been in some films or something.

  15. If it is who has been suggested, he would no longer be the Apple of his daughter’s eye.

    Tim adds: Rather depends upon which daughter you want to talk about.

  16. @ Fatty

    as Ian points out above, the Daily Mail’s definition of ‘rock’ probably differs from yours, or mine, or anyone who likes music. They probably still refer to the Stones as an R’n’B band.*

    *Or, if you remember your Rumpole: “Jazz musicians, as I understand m’Lud, of some notoriety.”

  17. Well I had a muse, followed by a rush of blood to the head and narrowed it down to two people.

    1. British – so not bono
    2. Wife might leave him – so someone with a missus who has an alternate career

    Now I might add at this point that all the stars of yesteryear had this happen to them, Macca included. I think that says a lot about how the middle classes have colonised rock music

  18. says a lot about how the middle classes have colonised rock music

    Colonised? Imported, invented, and run from the beginning, I reckon, at least in this country. Mostly because you need a certain amount of resources to buy the kit, leisure time to learn to play the instruments, and until the internet, enough disposable income to listen to other people playing some.

    There are some musical genres that came from the working classes, but rock has been a middle class, art school, often privately educated pastime from the beginning.

  19. rock has been a middle class, art school, often privately educated pastime from the beginning.

    Actually I don’t disagree at all. My thought was not clearly expressed. Let me try again

    The Rolling Stones are middle class par excellence. However they represented a kind of ersatz rebellion which was often claimed to be an exemplifier of working class culture. It would have been said that they were “authentic”, “true to their roots” and other baloney. A thousand other bands followed the template which included groupies and inevitably getting girls pregnant. The rebel image required that they carried on satisfying their appetites without care for the consequences to others.

    My point was that once upon a time the ersatz rebel pose was de rigueur, whereas now it seems to be rarer.

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