Middle-class families should stop buying large fridges in order to save energy and tackle climate change, a government-commissioned report has suggested.

Families could save up to £36 a year on their electricity bills by replacing large fridge-freezers or televisions with smaller appliances, according to a study published by the Department for Energy and Climate Change.

The point isn’t to make us all live in smaller houses, with smaller appliances, with fewer gizmos, in order to avoid this climate change thing.

The point is to allow us to have all those gizmos in every increasing sizes with more living space and still avoid climate change.

That is, to allow us to live rich, to carry on getting richer, without boiling the planet.

23 thoughts on “Sigh”

  1. No, the whole Green agenda is that we all live in smaller houses, with smaller appliances, with fewer gizmos, eventually getting back to an Arcadian existence as pre-industrial peasants.

  2. For the green movement, Pol Pot was right on the money, it’s only his timing that was wrong….

  3. What the Sage sagely said.

    And what utter bollocks this government report is. My leccy bill hasn’t gone up 3 million percent in the last decade because I’m using so much more of it. It’s because they’ve deliberately and with malice aforethought created rising energy prices as the central plank of their climate change war on plebs.

    BTW they can have my American-style stainless steel fridge-freezer with integrated ice machine when they take it from my cold, dead, UV-lit for freshness hands.

    “It warned that the trend undermined attempts to cut carbon emissions.”

    Fuck your carbon emissions, you effete socialist wankers. I’m off to burn some old tyres in my back garden now, just for spite.

    Nicola Terry, a co-author of the study, said: “Why do we need a bigger TV, and why do we need a bigger fridge? I don’t understand the case, but when people go to the shop they think, that’s bigger it must be better.”

    Fuck you too, you dozy hippy cow. I worked hard to be able to afford a big telly and I’d sooner burn you alive in a gigantic Wicker Television than go back to a 14 inch colour portable.

    BTW here are Nicola’s qualifications for telling us how to live our lives:

    BSc (Hons) Open University 1st class (2010) in Environmental Studies
    MA (Hons) Cambridge 1st class (1984) in Computer Science and Engineering


    One laughably outdated computer science degree from Nineteen Canteen and a comedy environmentalist degree from BBC 2.

    These days I use a Mac Mini with Mac OS X.

    What do you need a Mac Mini for, you old trout? A BBC Micro uses less energy. Get with the programme.

    BTW if you’d like to learn more unsurprising facts about the calibre of people advising HM government these days, Nicola’s blog is a trove:


    She thinks carbon taxes make us richer and has invested her nasty hippy gold in windfarms. And she hates fracking. Good to know, eh?

  4. I want a bigger telly. I’ve got a 32″ and want a 40″. I’ll even be green by buying a bigger telly. Why? Because I’ll be going from an energy guzzling CRT to a energy sipping LCD. #GreeniesAreStupid

    Oh, and the sage is right. Greenpeace love the medieval age. They think its a perfect way of life.

  5. ““Why do we need a bigger TV, and why do we need a bigger fridge? I don’t understand the case.”

    With human visual acuity at some 60 lines per degree, and HD content (i.e. 1920×1080 resolution), and modest viewing distances, you can go pretty big before a bigger display is counter-productive, e.g. a 60″ TV at a viewing distance of 3.33m still only gives 85.77 lines per degree.

  6. Ah yes, but you see, in a smaller house you won’t be able to get 3.33m from the screen, so it all makes sense in the end.

  7. getting a bit like the second world war. There is a danger Germany will take us all over, and we are getting into rationing, with the lights likely to go off.

  8. David Moore – I think I’ve discovered where these climate models come from, too. Remember in the early 80’s when micros first came out, and they all had programs to track your “biorhythms”, based on the hippy science of bullshit?

    Climate models are just retooled biorhythm charts.

    Alex B – factually accurate, but the wrong answer. The correct answer to some impertinent Golgafrincham B-Ark hag demanding to know why you – a grown man – want to spend the money you earned on a larger television is: because fuck you, that’s why.

    I don’t think it’s unfair to say that someone who makes a parasitic living out of “consulting for DECC on the energy saving potential of […] putting the lid on saucepans or opening the fridge door less often” deserves to be fed to polar bears.

  9. Climate change is and has been a linear process since the Earth formed.

    Avoiding climate change is really a silly thing to say.

    Reminder: the supposed anthropogenic signature in the near surface temperature record which mysteriously appeared in the 1970s… which ‘scientists’ insisted could only be anthropogenic… disappeared in 1995 and so far has not returned, despite record CO2 emissions from fossil fuels and a doubling of atmospheric CO2 concentration since pre-20th Century… the ‘scientists’ cannot explain this, because the famous ‘science’ does not exist for them to use to do so.

    If ‘scientists’ cannot explain the recent and current behaviour of the climate system and its sensitivity to atmospheric CO2, how can they explain its behaviour in 50, 100, 200 years time?

    More to the point, what are we to think of those who believe they can?

  10. “These days I use a Mac Mini with Mac OS X.”

    Rare to see Apple snobbery from the Proggies these days. I thought the plebs all getting iPhones had soured that once great hipster brand.

    She doesn’t understand the need for a bigger TV, so that’s good enough. My parents would see the need for her to have a “Mac mini with OS X”, so out it goes.

  11. Alastair, I foresee jobs for the ecoloons coming round our houses at 10pm every night telling us to “put that bloody light off”

  12. “Climate change is and has been a linear process since the Earth formed.” Eh? What are you on about?

  13. Steve-

    Remember in the early 80′s when micros first came out, and they all had programs to track your “biorhythms”, based on the hippy science of bullshit?

    I really think you might be onto something there.

  14. The Mrs has her heart set on an American-style four door job. On reading this I have gone from rolling-eyed-resignation to green-goading enthusiasm. In fact, I’m now risking disappointment on my own part because she wants the one that’s just slightly less humungous (because it won’t fit into the gap she’s earmarked for it).

    Anyway, bigger fridge-freezer equals fewer trips to Waitrose – better for the environment, see?

  15. Bloke in Costa Rica

    A Mac mini is a pretty low power device – mine uses 85W full blast and 11W asleep. A BBC micro used about 20W but the CRT monitor drew a lot more than LCDs so it’s probably a wash.

    The sheer presumptuousness of this harridan is astounding. And £36 a year? Can I pay tenpence a day to get these people to leave me the fuck alone? Or even better, to pay into a subscription scheme to every so often have one of them snatched from their polytechnic office, fried in lard and fed to crocodiles?

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