Headline of the day

Cupertino idiot-tax operation junks duff throbbless jazzbangles

23 thoughts on “Headline of the day”

  1. So Much for Subtlety

    Yeah but it is next to an article on the world’s most disturbing Captcha.

    I am fond of the phrase jazzbangle.

  2. Aye, its a cracking headline – no doubt about it. The writers got form — here’s some of his other work.

    “Apple, IBM foist fondleslabs on Japan’s elderly”

    BATWINGED DINO-PIGEON causes FLAP in bone-boffinry circles”

    “Top Spanish minister shows citizens are thick as tortillas de ballenas”

    “Bongfire of Inanity: Jakarta rozzers enforce mass chill-out”

    And thats just from the last month! I hope Alexander J Martin is getting properly rewarded for his skills.

  3. The content of the piece was just racist stereotyping. The Japanese deliver stuff that works but the Chinese let you down. I’m just surprised that he didn’t work in a crack about once you’ve had one Chinese jazzbangle you’ll want another in next to no time.

  4. El Reg is a proper media organisation. With subeditors and all. Meaning that journos don’t write the headlines. They get someone in special to do that.

  5. Sebastian Weetabix

    It may be a stereotype, but having worked and lived in both China and Japan I can assure you there’s a lot of truth in it.

  6. S2,

    Except the “cheap” bit.

    I was trying to work out what the utility value of a watch that needs charging every day, will last a couple of years and saves me pulling a phone out of my pocket is, and I think it’s about £10. I don’t even wear a watch now because time is ubiquitous. My car, phone, PC, cooker, DVD player and TV all have clocks on them. There’s never a moment where I’m struggling to find the time.

    I get the Rolex thing. Chuffing expensive, show off your wealth, but also show off your taste. Rolexes do at least look good.

  7. The Stigler: “I don’t even wear a watch now because time is ubiquitous. “

    Snap! Stopped wearing one (except at functions) three years ago for just that very reason.

  8. The Stigler: “I don’t even wear a watch now because time is ubiquitous.

    Except in my company, where people have been told not to use their phones in meetings, but a lot of meeting rooms don’t have clocks. FFS.

    I still wear a watch because I think a surreptitious glance at it is more polite than pulling a phone out of my pocket.

  9. I haven’t worn a watch in years either. It’s an age since I experienced the once common experience of not being sure what the time is.

  10. bloke (not) in spain

    I do wear a watch. But I’ve lost the little book tells me how it works. So currently, I’m organised around the time in Romania. Does wonders for your mental arithmetic

  11. I find my watch invaluable when I’m teaching dances that involve circles, and I have to tell people which way to go round 🙂

  12. Bloke in Germany

    I guess the time telling crapps are banned because crapple would rather you had to buy an annual subscription for that.

  13. “I can assure you there’s a lot of truth in it.” That was rather the point of my sarcasm.

  14. > I find my watch invaluable when I’m teaching dances that involve circles, and I have to tell people which way to go round

    Two of my favourite words in the English language are “widdershins” and “deosil”. Great words made cruelly redundant by clocks.

  15. I don’t wear a watch but I live in Dorset. Since pubs started opening all day there’s no need to know the precise time.

  16. “I get the Rolex thing. Chuffing expensive, show off your wealth, but also show off your taste. Rolexes do at least look good.”

    Rolexes are for used car salesmen with moustaches that did OK in the 90’s.

    There’s much better, much classier mechanical men’s jewelry that can be had for the same money (or less) as a Rolex.

  17. @abacab:

    Yes, I’ve got a TAG as it’s robust enough to wear when playing sport and still looks smart.

  18. Bloke in Costa Rica

    I have a watch because it’s more convenient to have a little clock strapped to my wrist than look at my phone when I want to know the time. It cost me $30 and I got lucky with the crystal as it’s good to about 1ppm (i.e. 30s per year). The Apple Watch is not primarily a timekeeping device (although of course being slaved to an iPhone which in turn is tied to the cellular network it will be very, very accurate as a timepiece) but an augmented interface to stuff you can do now but perhaps more clumsily, plus the applications platform for biometric monitoring services which for some reason seem to be popular these days. Will I buy one? Highly unlikely. Will it be a success? Who knows, although betting against Apple in recent years has not been where the smart money is.

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