Amanda Marcotte and humour don’t quite go together

Presents for the Republican candidates in your life lead to this:

Donald Trump’s been having a hell of a year, so you’d think he wants for nothing. But that isn’t true! He does seem to be deeply unsatisfied with all of woman-kind’s ability to please him. They are all too ugly and keep having body functions like urination and menstruation, even though this is the 21st century and we should have licked that problem by now. So why not get him a Real Doll, a life-sized, realistic sex toy that looks like a woman but has all those unpleasant parts — body functions, normal human faces, opinions — removed.

Sigh.

No love, you’re supposed to be vicious. Just point out that he’s already had two such since Ivana.

What’s worse is that there is a good joke in there, that licked it one, but I’m absolutely certain that was unintentional, a product of the writing style, not thought or intent.

5 thoughts on “Amanda Marcotte and humour don’t quite go together”

  1. S’pose Trump dearrangement syndrome is pretty well established & epidemic,now. After a cure for the Bush strain was finally found, too.. Tragic. Just tragic.

  2. Ah, Amanda. How I had fun with her writing back when she was at Pandagon (and without layers of editors). It’s good to see that she still can’t write for crap.

    What’s also interesting is her assertion that Trump somehow has problems with women’s bodily functions. Not sure where that came from. In actuality, if anyone is troubled by those functions, it would seem to be Amanda herself. She seems obsessed by them.

    Finally, if anyone looks the part of a Real Doll, it’s Amanda herself. Take a look at just about any photo of her and you can’t avoid the idea that she’s recently been in a head-on collision with an Avon truck. For a bimbo who is fighting the patriarchy with each and every breath, she sure does pack on the pancake…

  3. I have a fantasy that the next US President, on entering office, immediately revokes all of Obama’s imperial proclamations, arrests the heads of of all the federal agencies, especially the EPA, IRS, Justice Dept. etc., etc., and after a swift treason trial, has them hanged, drawn and quartered and their heads displayed on pikes at the entrances to the various agencies they despoiled pour encourager les autres.

    My Trump Derangement Syndrome is that, on election, the Donald will do all of the above then immediately begin issuing proclamations of his own while appointing a gang of cronies to head up the various agencies and commence his own version of the looting and destruction that’s happening now.

  4. My fantasy would be that the next President abolishes all functions of the Federal government except the army, and devolves everything to the States.

    No wait, that’s Europe I’m thinking of. Either way it isn’t going to happen.

  5. So Much For Subtlety

    I wonder what is going through Amanda Marcotte’s mind? I find Trump’s constant chase of nubile young female bimbos worthy of mockery, but at least I recognise that millions of men admire him for it and would love to be in his shoes.

    No one wants to be Mr Marcotte.

    So is this her attempt to rationalise away the obvious – Trump is more attractive male to her than any feminist creep likely to come within her purview?

    Ms Marcotte probably applies the slap because she realises she has passed her Last F*ckable Day. And she is conflicted about that. See Jessica Valenti’s shallow, trite but still wounded views on no longer being f*ckable:

    http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/jul/20/catcall-culture-feminism-jessica-valenti

    Marcotte was never in Valenti’s league. Which isn’t saying much. I suggest she deals with her emotional problems and not project them on to Trump.

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