This stops Germany invading France, no?

The EU is poised to ban high-powered appliances such as kettles, toasters, hair-dryers within months of Britain’s referendum vote, despite senior officials admitting the plan has brought them “ridicule”.

The European Commission plans to unveil long-delayed ‘ecodesign’ restrictions on small household appliances in the autumn. They are expected to ban the most energy-inefficient devices from sale in order to cut carbon emissions.

The plans have been ready for many months, but were shelved for fear of undermining the referendum campaign if they were perceived on an assault on the British staples of tea and toast. A sales ban on high-powered vacuum cleaners and inefficient electric ovens in 2014 sparked a public outcry in Britain.

Course it does. If the Wermacht can’t brew up quickly they’ll never reach Paris.

42 thoughts on “This stops Germany invading France, no?”

  1. What they’re trying to achieve here, eludes me. To boil a volume of water requires a fixed amount of energy. So, the rate at which that energy is put into the water is immaterial. It’s the same amount of energy.
    However, the inefficiencies in doing so are proportional to the time taken to do so, due to heat escaping during the process (Anyone tried to boil a kettle over a small camping stove will recognise this)
    And on a practical level, if you’ve a quick boiling kettle you’re much more likely to fill it, wait while it boils, use the water. If it takes a long time, you go do something else, return, find the kettle’s boiled & switched off, switch it back on again & wait whilst it re-boils. Sometimes you go through several cycles.
    Toasters are even worse. The inefficiencies are higher. Reduce the power enough & you can thoroughly dessicate bread, heat the entire house to sauna levels & still not actually get any toast.

  2. BiS


    They obviously have nothing serious to do. I dress in a little dressing room (I’m posh you see). If it’s cold I turn on the fan heater; 1500W. It does the job in seconds and then I turn it off.

    I want real heat, not a smell-free fart from an Eu approved low wattage that goes nowhere and does nothing and needs to be switched on 10 minutes before.

    Those guys and gals get paid for doing this???

  3. Using more energy efficient appliances only saves you money. The grid still needs to maintain the base and lead load, so you turning off all your lights doesnt save energy in the grid just money on your electricity bill.

    Or am I wrong?

  4. It’s okay BiS, the ECJ have claimed that they now have jurisdiction over the laws of thermodynamics.

  5. I’ve no problem with them banning inefficient devices (as long as the efficiency levels are realistic etc) however that isn’t what they are doing, they are banning high powered devices regardless of how efficient they are and ignoring the fact that more power may get the job done quicker and therefore uses less energy in total.

  6. This sort of thing leaves me dazed and confused.

    If this sort of thing gets right on your tits – and what sane person would not find it so? – what most of the country seems to be saying is; “I really don’t want to pay these sort of people some of my earnings, but I really, really, desperately don’t want to have the choice of not doing so.”

    Yes, let’s remain in an organisation where you have to pay these people or they lock you up.

  7. So the right to use over powered vacuum cleaners is worth getting out of a Free Trade area of 500million people is it? (This is the level of TW’s “argument”)

  8. I suppose when eight million kettles are switched on during the Coronation Street ad break, having them all boil slowly means a slightly lower peak load. That’s the only technical advantage I can see.

  9. The whole point about this is that it has nothing to do with the single market, and everything to do with a political decision, on which we are disenfranchised.

  10. So Much For Subtlety

    DBC Reed – “So the right to use over powered vacuum cleaners is worth getting out of a Free Trade area of 500million people is it? (This is the level of TW’s “argument”)”

    What PF said. The proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back is just a straw. The question you have to ask yourself is if you are not free to buy the heater you want, what are you free to do? What part of our lives in Brussels willing to leave to us?

  11. “So the right to use over powered vacuum cleaners is worth getting out of a Free Trade area of 500million people is it? (This is the level of TW’s “argument””

    A “free trade area” which bans toasters, kettles and vacuum cleaners. That’s the level of your ‘argument’?

  12. So Much For Subtlety

    If the Wermacht can’t brew up quickly they’ll never reach Paris.

    Actually that would be Wehrmacht. Well, you know, someone had to do it.

    In passing someone told me once that every British tank since about the Centurion has had a hot plate-type thing. So that the crew could brew a cup of tea any time they liked. I assume that the more superstitious tankers avoid the term “brew up”. Not sure if it is high powered enough to be banned though.

  13. Reedy–“Free trade” area –run by arrogant commissars who have some sort of “kettle envy”.

    Try not to be a bigger moron than you can help .

  14. For the first ten years I visited my father in law in France he used to boil his water (ooo err missus) in a saucepan. It’s only in the last year that a small, apology for a kettle has made an appearance. I suspect much of Europe won’t notice this, and who cares what the Brits think anyhow.

    This is all about peak load as others have said, and religious sacrifice, the two aims of which are that it is pointless and painful. It’s all part of the slow motion economic and demographic suicide that lies at the heart of this death cult.

    Far better to leave now whilst we can still can in an orderly fashion, rather than do so messily when the EU implodes in a couple of decades time.

  15. I can actually see a point here. Electric resistance heating is very inefficient. What could possibly go wrong with replacing all of the current devices that use this technology with something more efficient like burning the gas directly?

    I think that this should be taken to it’s logical conclusion. Any device that traditionally needs convect, conduct, or radiate heat should be changed to direct gas. This means we can ban the new light bulbs that don’t provide the IR component, in a light source, that millions of years of human evolution have adapted to. Gaslights for everyone it is.

  16. No one sets out to buy an inefficient machine.

    So the real purpose of these regulations must lie elsewhere. In protecting incumbents and protectionism, of course. We’re in a customs union, not a free trade bloc. I wish we could smash it all together, but if not then let’s smash it piece by piece.

  17. BiF, I think it’s simpler than that. We have an EU committee in charge of environmental regulations. So they create regulations. It’s what they do.

  18. @DBC Reed {Some waffle about a free trade area}

    There is nothing “free” about an area with a joining fee of 1% of GDP a year, evenb if you get half of that back in grants to farmers and “rebates”.

    With a net contribution of £10 billion a year and exports of £230 billion a year, that works out at over 4% of the value of exports, a saving perhaps to exportsers, but a cost to the rest of society.

  19. There is a slight advantage because of the impedance of the domestic supply. Assuming an impedance of about 0,5 ohm, a 1KW kettle would be about 99.1% efficient whereas a 500W kettle would be about 99.6% efficient, although as mentioned above the longer time taken to boil water may lead to higher heat losses for the lower powered kettle.

  20. ‘Actually that would be Wehrmacht. Well, you know, someone had to do it.’

    Das Heeres, not Wehrmacht.

    Sumbuddy had to do it.

  21. SMFS – I think it’s called a Boiling Vessel (or more likely ‘Vessel, Boiling’), hence BV, hence bevvie.

  22. Rob Harries

    Or am I wrong?


    You are on the right track. Monopolistic, regulated utilities have a guaranteed rate of return. If you use a more efficient device, they will raise their rates to cover the loss.

  23. Custard Cream,
    Bevvie comes from beverage, which comes from Latin.

    The Chinese were very impressed when they heard about how much the British tanks “brew up”. (Or was it the Japanese?)

  24. MattyJ
    Yes EU committees do stuff, because EU…
    But they still need some lobbying shill from Philips or Electrolux or Bosch to tell them what shit to do.

  25. The Meissen Bison

    Gamecock: Why the quibble with Wehrmacht? If you really want to stipulate ‘army’ rather than ‘armed forces’, the word is Das Heer rather than your offering, I’m afraid.

  26. OKH was Oberkommando des Heeres.

    K, I messed up the article. Des Heeres.

    OKH is by far the most common reference to des Heeres Western Allies hear, so I’ll stick with it.

    But I would appreciate a German language lesson. When should it be Heer and when should it be Heeres? And why do so damn many people use Wehrmacht to incorrectly refer to the army? My only explanation is they love the sound of Wehrmacht. And maybe don’t know how to pronounce Heer/Heeres.

  27. The Meissen Bison

    Gamecock: des Heeres is the genitive form of das Heer and means ‘of the army’ as in ‘High command of the army’.

  28. Bloke in Costa Rica

    And of course there actually was OKW, as in Overkommando der Wehrmacht, which started nominally subordinate to OKH and ended up higher up the chain of command but still in rivalry with OKH, which did wonders for operational efficiency.

    The banning high power appliances thing will affect the UK whether it leaves the EU or not. It’s like how California’s batshit insane emissions regulations are de facto applied across the rest of the US because the manufacturers don’t want the expense of making two models. But making a kettle consume less power in an attempt to make it consume less energy is so fucking stupid it makes my nose bleed.

  29. If you use a more efficient device, they will raise their rates

    In the short run. The long-run argument is that they will defer capital spend on the plant otherwise required to meet load. I’ve never seen it – but that’s the argument the Demand-Side Management guys trot out.

    But making a kettle consume less power in an attempt to make it consume less energy is so fucking stupid it makes my nose bleed.

    Confession: I consult to some utilities, including the local electric provider. They remodeled their offices, and included too-few microwave oven in the kitchens – there was counter-space for at least four, and only one in place. The result was a pretty long line-up for the microwave at lunch, as there were a lot of staff who used that kitchen. I asked their space-planning people why they hadn’t installed more ovens when the space was clearly intended for them. They told me it was to “save energy” (conservation is a bit of a shibboleth at utilities these days). After a bit of a headpalm, I tried to calmly explain that the total amount of soup (etc) heated was what drove energy consumption, and that an employee at an [expletive] electric utility should have some notion of the difference between [expletive] capacity and [expletive] energy. I never got a reply…

  30. Thanks, Meissen Bison!

    Going for Peak Pendantry now:

    How to pronounce Heer and Heeres?

    AND . . .

    Is Harris anglicized Heeres?

  31. The Meissen Bison

    Heer sounds like Heir and Heeres sounds like Heiress only with the letter H aspirated as in Heil (not a word much in vogue nowadays).

  32. The Meissen Bison

    BiCR; hɛərəs is closer to it, I think. It’s the double ‘e’ that’s misleading perhaps.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *