‘The poll of 2,000 adults for the not-for-profit body UKactive…’
Another waste of money lobby group?
Thomas Fuller
How many calories do grunting and grimacing burn? I can’t find the figures anywhere on the net.
MC
@Thomas Fuller – it depends on your diet. Studies show the weight loss benefits of a high protein diet are partially due to the calories burned in trying to shit out the detritus of a 56 ounce ribeye every day.
Maritime Barbarian
Well, I just started my week with 55 minutes in the gym. I will sit on the bog once a day for about two minutes a time.
I reckon that puts me at the bottom end of the distribution. (Sorry – pun not intended).
AndrewC
Easy, just call your toilet the ‘Jim’, instead of the ‘John’.
Then tell people at the office;
“I had a few beers last night so went to the Jim really early this morning.”
OR
“After my curry on Saturday I spent a couple of hours in the Jim on Sunday”.
Impresses the co-workers no end.
So Much For Subtlety
Well obviously. You can’t read while jogging.
(Or reply to blog posts with your new mobile phone)
Nautical Nick
A biological download is instant weight-loss…
john77
@ SMFS
I’ve seen people on their ‘phone while jogging (they were jogging – I was walking). I steered well clear.
Matt Wardman
‘Tis Humbug.
Strain …. relax
Strain …. relax
Exercise is the upside of constipation.
Kevin B
As I get older I tend, more and more, to sit down to pee in order to allow time for the last dribbles from my bladder to force their way past my swollen prostate. This means that although I go for one or two half-hour walks each day, I could well be approaching the ‘more time spent on the bog than exercising” threshold.
Mind you, if I count the time I spend manually draining my prostate two or three times a week as exercise, I’m probably on the ‘good’ side of the equation.
Gamecock
A First World problem.
jgh
I spend more time asleep than exercising.
Bloke in Costa Rica
Many years ago I had a job as a test engineer in an electronics factory. There was a pneumatic but particularly bubble-headed secretary who one day squeaked to her friends in the canteen that she’d lost two pounds that weekend. On hearing this my mate Yad Lowcey the Dyslexic Technician (possibly the funniest bloke I ever met) roared loud enough for everyone to stop mid-chew: “Two pounds?! I lost more than that having a shit this morning!” Bubble Head turned vermilion while everyone else fell about.
I suspect you’d die much quicker if you didn’t shit than if you didn’t exercise.
‘The poll of 2,000 adults for the not-for-profit body UKactive…’
Another waste of money lobby group?
How many calories do grunting and grimacing burn? I can’t find the figures anywhere on the net.
@Thomas Fuller – it depends on your diet. Studies show the weight loss benefits of a high protein diet are partially due to the calories burned in trying to shit out the detritus of a 56 ounce ribeye every day.
Well, I just started my week with 55 minutes in the gym. I will sit on the bog once a day for about two minutes a time.
I reckon that puts me at the bottom end of the distribution. (Sorry – pun not intended).
Easy, just call your toilet the ‘Jim’, instead of the ‘John’.
Then tell people at the office;
“I had a few beers last night so went to the Jim really early this morning.”
OR
“After my curry on Saturday I spent a couple of hours in the Jim on Sunday”.
Impresses the co-workers no end.
Well obviously. You can’t read while jogging.
(Or reply to blog posts with your new mobile phone)
A biological download is instant weight-loss…
@ SMFS
I’ve seen people on their ‘phone while jogging (they were jogging – I was walking). I steered well clear.
‘Tis Humbug.
Strain …. relax
Strain …. relax
Exercise is the upside of constipation.
As I get older I tend, more and more, to sit down to pee in order to allow time for the last dribbles from my bladder to force their way past my swollen prostate. This means that although I go for one or two half-hour walks each day, I could well be approaching the ‘more time spent on the bog than exercising” threshold.
Mind you, if I count the time I spend manually draining my prostate two or three times a week as exercise, I’m probably on the ‘good’ side of the equation.
A First World problem.
I spend more time asleep than exercising.
Many years ago I had a job as a test engineer in an electronics factory. There was a pneumatic but particularly bubble-headed secretary who one day squeaked to her friends in the canteen that she’d lost two pounds that weekend. On hearing this my mate Yad Lowcey the Dyslexic Technician (possibly the funniest bloke I ever met) roared loud enough for everyone to stop mid-chew: “Two pounds?! I lost more than that having a shit this morning!” Bubble Head turned vermilion while everyone else fell about.
…only if you’re constipated