They did work out so much after all. All that angles and triangles stuff even if the philosophers are still gnawing away at their first question, “What is -?” where “-” is whatever.
The social propriety was that a man may make an approach to a woman. She may, and almost certainly will for reasons of propriety, say no the first two times. The third approach/request is the one that gains the true answer. The Y/N answer to that third is treated as final by all.
To ask 3 times is not harrassment, oppression nor rape. It’s the sexual dance. To ask a fourth time, or to refuse to accept the third answer is somewhere along that spectrum.
There is no particular reason or three times. There is a very good reason why there is and should be some generally accepted method of conducting the sexual dance. A necessary societal agreement of the form it should take.
Which is where I think out current problems really lie. Sure, we’ve agitators screaming about stuff and all that. But underlying is that the dance steps have changed and we’ve not all got a common agreement as to what they are as yet.
What actually is sexual politesse in a world of both booty calls and also a passing comment upon looks being sexual oppression?
No, not what should such politesse be, not how would the world be better if it were. But what actually is the general agreement upon how the sexual dance is to be conducted?