Typical Guardian

As Brexit looms, stockpiling food seems the only sensible response
Ian Jack
I’m not spreading fear and alarm. A government as inept as this one cannot be trusted to feed us

We’ve not got that National Food Service. Anyone told The Guardian as yet?

31 thoughts on “Typical Guardian”

  1. The forecast shortages can only come about by one of two means.
    A naval blockade, presumably carried out by the navies of the EU. Doesn’t sound likely to say the least, and given that no German submarine is operable at the moment is unlikely to be possible. It would also entail attacks on neutral shipping, which just might invite retaliation from said neutral countries.
    Or HMG bans all imports. Even Mrs May is not that stupid, and would in any case struggle to gain parliamentary support.
    There will be no shortages, maybe some price adjustments depending on what import duties the government chooses to impose but that’s all.
    What we are seeing is spoilt brats who have never had to defend their positions or their views now exposing that they are defenceless.

  2. What Pat said.

    Even this “but WTO” is nonsense. At that point, we just quit the WTO and make our own rules. What, French farmers are going to care as long as their produce sells?

    That said, this had just hardened my leave opinion. If Brussels are going to be arseholes, we take an undiplomatic stage with them.

  3. Bloke in North Dorset

    Pat,

    The argument, as far as I understand it, is that there will be massive delays at ports because we don’t have the customs infrastructure in place to process the imports. This means that the food will rot and have to be thrown away because our government are too stupid to wave it in while the problem is sorted.

    The daftest one I heard, when I had the misfortune to find myself listening to an LBC phone-in on the subject, was some clown claiming he worked in the electricity industry saying that without “a deal” the French won’t sell us electricity and the various interconnections will be shut down and the lights will go out. The presenter didn’t have the wit to ask why we needed a political union and/or customs union and/or single market to be able to trade electrons. Its not like we don’t already have the interconnect agreement in place.

  4. It is Project Fear 2.0 Y2K.

    It didn’t work before.

    And now with the Fish Faced Cow leaking–it seems to me as a “tactic” if so grand a term can be applied to anything the brainless bitch does–that she intends top release 70 government “documents”??? showing how terrible WTO will be, it behoves us all to act as a steadying influence. And the voice of reason against remainiac bullshit.

    The very fact that a now widely hated cow announces-by-leak that she is going to try and “frighten” us is a move so inept as to defy sanity in the first place.

  5. Its not a question of selling, its a question of delivering.
    20 mile tailback of lorries and ships full of containers and we either allow lots of lorries through without checking them or else we spend the time checking the lorries / containers.

    Letting through without customs checks – will that impact smuggling of goods & people?

    Came across a guy recently on a business forum, his import of items required fumigation. If the container had not been checked would he have instead released millions of whatever into a workplace?

  6. “Letting through without customs checks – will that impact smuggling of goods & people?

    Came across a guy recently on a business forum, his import of items required fumigation. If the container had not been checked would he have instead released millions of whatever into a workplace?”

    We aren’t stopping them anyway Martin. And since the Fish Faced Cow reduced our coastal patrol boats–you know to stop folk going around customs anyway—to four (two of which are farting around in the Med) I don’t believe she gives a rat’s arse in any case about what comes into the UK.

    Except now as an anti-Brexit tactic.

  7. “Champagne drinkers hardest hit…..”

    English “can’t call it champagne because EU rules” is at least as good as the French stuff.

  8. “Its not a question of selling, its a question of delivering.
    20 mile tailback of lorries and ships full of containers and we either allow lots of lorries through without checking them or else we spend the time checking the lorries / containers.”

    We let them through. So, carry on doing it until it’s resolved. What’s the problem with that?

    “Letting through without customs checks – will that impact smuggling of goods & people?”

    We let the same people through that we do right now. We retain the status quo until we sort things out. No worse than right now.

    “Came across a guy recently on a business forum, his import of items required fumigation. If the container had not been checked would he have instead released millions of whatever into a workplace?”

    A container from outside the EU, presumably. So, we retain the status quo and keep checking those until we sort things out.

  9. ‘A government as inept as this one cannot be trusted to feed us’

    That’s why there is a big, private food industry.

  10. “The imposition of tariffs and the likely collapse of sterling will mean that olive oil and wine will never again be as cheap. A middle-class way of life that began in the 1960s may be coming to an end.”

    Someone bookmark this in “The Guardian… Wrong About Everything” folder that we can chuckle at in a few years.

    How in the name of fuck is wine going to rise in price? We already have wine on our shelves from New Zealand, Chile, Australia, USA, Argentina and South Africa. All outside the EU. All highly competitive (generally better value) than European wine. The winemakers of the Loire are going to leave prices the same while everyone grabs Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc and makes them broke? Not going to happen. If we impose WTO tariffs on French wine, they’ll have to lower their prices to compete.

    And give it 5-10 years, a new player is going to be on the shelves big time: China. Already the 6th largest wine producer in the world. Most of it bloody awful, but there’s a load of investment going in from the big wine making companies who can use their expertise and brand to sell it here (like Chandon China).

  11. ” English “can’t call it champagne because EU rules” is at least as good as the French stuff.”

    Ugh, my dear Arthur, that so-called English wine is for plebs! Only a truly civilised people like the French know how to make wine.

  12. As to customs checks, it is entirely within our power to continue what we are doing at the moment. So the delays in imports post Brexiteers should be no worse than they are at present. I would note that operation stack has been activated 17 times whilst we have been members of the EU, none of which was caused by leaving.

  13. “The imposition of tariffs and the likely collapse of sterling will mean that olive oil and wine will never again be as cheap. A middle-class way of life that began in the 1960s may be coming to an end.”

    Christ, there’s some stupid cvnts around. A litre of red plonk is 75 pence in the supermarket round the corner. Stick 50% import tariffs on it and it’d still be close to 4 quid in Tescos. Because HM f**king G stick whopping great taxes on plonk. And it’ll be even less noticeable for the high priced plonk with the pretty labels, the middle classes insist on drinking. Because the taxes are on it being plonk, not the label.
    And your dinky bottles of olive oil are two & a half quid because you all insist on buying dinky bottles of olive oil at high prices to show how middle class you are. Here we buy it 3 litres at a time at a fraction of the price. Again, tariffs if any, will make b*gger all difference.

  14. “The imposition of tariffs and the likely collapse of sterling will mean that olive oil and wine will never again be as cheap”

    So. Don’t. Impose. Tariffs.

    Sheesh! When did it become compulsary to have a brainectomy to become a journalist?

  15. The whole idea is that we will have to impose customs duties on food imports and processing these will delay lorries.
    SO the simple answer is that we impose no customs duties on food imports from anywhere and *speed up* non-EU food imports.
    Like now we have two queues – EU and non-EU – we can have two queues of Food and non-Food with randon checks and jail-time (while awaiting trial) of anyone caught cheating.

  16. A note of caution, guys.

    Tariffs on food are a stupid idea. Holding food up at customs till it rots is also a stupid idea.

    Enforcement of stupid ideas is something our chums in the public sector delight in. I don’t share our host’s confidence that just because they don’t have to impose max tariffs they won’t.

  17. @ Plink and Pcar
    Please note that the planned lorry park is in Kent for lorries waiting to enter Dover i.e. from the UK. That implies that the French plan is to impose customs delays in Calais so that lorries cannot get *out* of the UK.
    The UK can wave drivers through if they want but the French are planning a roadblock

  18. “I’m not spreading fear and alarm. A government as inept as this one cannot be trusted to feed us”

    1. The EU government has never fed you either dear. You’re fed by the actions of multiple private organizations. So the change in government won’t effect that.

    2. If you’re worried enough that you think you need to stockpile food, you shouldn’t be stockpiling food. You should be cashing out and *leaving while the leaving’s good’. Use some of that amazing foresight and get the hell out while you are in a position to set yourself up properly and don’t wait until the food runs out and you’re fleeing to a camp across the channel with the other millions of refugees.

  19. “Please note that the planned lorry park is in Kent for lorries waiting to enter Dover i.e. from the UK. That implies that the French plan is to impose customs delays in Calais so that lorries cannot get *out* of the UK.”

    Not going to happen. Because we can fuck up the French imports far more. I could easily forgo French brie and French wine as reprisals. Let’s see how they feel when the farmers of Isigny are marching on Paris with pitchforks because no-one wants to be seen buying French butter. Or when the British public, who buy an enormous amount of Champagne stops buying it and those maniacs from CRAV do their worst.

  20. “Enforcement of stupid ideas is something our chums in the public sector delight in. I don’t share our host’s confidence that just because they don’t have to impose max tariffs they won’t.”

    The public sector is generally shit, but the public generally doesn’t grasp how shit because it’s very under the radar. When people start going hungry because of public sector twattishness, they’ll be a lot of hempen rope heading for Westminster.

  21. Any trouble the EU causes invites retaliation.

    -Corp tax at 5% –been suggested on here.
    -VAT abolished
    -Giant Enterprise zones of bonfired regs across the UK

    Lets see how the ESpew like them apples. Or straightened bananas.

  22. I’m not spreading fear and alarm. A government as inept as this one cannot be trusted to feed us

    Ian is lying in the first sentence. Also, we have an inept government that cannot feed us, but yet we are all obese? Tricky.

  23. Facts be damned. The whole point of the article is to scare people in the remainiac cause. Would you expect anything else from the Guardian these days? While we’re on it, why, when I occasionally see a Sunday morning pol prog, it always seems to have Polly bloody Toynbee on. Is there a secret codicil to the BBC’s charter that guarantees her air time? I also note complaints about Farage’s appearances on QT, ‘cos he’s not an elected MP. No matter that he represented the views of a large chunk of the populace before the referendum.

  24. In order to charge tariffs the regulations would need to start being changed now. Then put in the Gazette with appropriate time lag. Otherwise the computing systems won’t be ready on time.

    There’s a huge number of tariff codes that need to be individually changed. I would guess in the thousands.

    There’s only two possible options at present after Brexit. It stays exactly as it is now or everything goes to zero. Nothing else will be done in time.

    Since there’s no way they’ll have the balls to go to zero, on B-day+1 exactly nothing will change. It’s the safest way to avoid confusion.

    After that tariffs might come down.

    They won’t go up. The mechanisms to do so would need to be started already to do that.

  25. @ Chester Draws
    Major food importer sets tariffs at zero – who loses?
    OK UK farmers do *IF* we don’t change the subsidy regime when we leave CAP – er, isn’t that a no-brainer? Scrap subsidies for EU rapeseed oil processors, reinstitute hill-farm subsidies (making the farmer’s income comparable to the amount his wife earns from B&Bs in the summer holidays, so that occasionally the lad stays at home and one of the farm cottages is lived in and a dilspidated one is restored to provide a replacement B&B), scrap limits on dairy production, encourage crop rotation and one-year-in-seven-fallow instead of CAP “set-asides” …

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