Which are being idiots here

One in five vanilla ice-creams has no vanilla, cream or fresh milk


Britain’s longest heatwave since 1976 has seen ice-cream sales soar, but a survey has revealed that some brands are sold without vanilla, cream or fresh milk.

Something must be done!

There are currently no requirements for manufacturers to meet before a product can be called ice-cream. Only products labelled as “dairy ice-cream” should contain at least 5% dairy fat, some protein from a dairy source and no vegetable fats.

Oh, something has been one. Back to sleep everyone.

14 thoughts on “Which are being idiots here”

  1. Surely it’s what it tastes like, not what’s in it? Our local Iceland store sells Lyons in 4 litre tubs. (Spanish seem limited to 1 litre) Doubt if it contains vanilla, chocolate or strawberries, never mind dairy fats. But we worked through 16 litres at the weekend, to popular acclaim. Haagen Daz may tick several gourmet boxes but I don’t have a spare 70€’s hanging around to tick them.

  2. I would have thought in the UK during the 70s and 80s, 4 out of 5 at least would have had no real vanilla or cream, they were dried milk and vegetable oil. Happily, capitalism solved the problem.

    Interestingly the change in labelling regulations that the grauniad points the finger at was brought in at behest of the EU, not that they like to mention that.

  3. Haagen Daz is awful, the Hersheys of ice cream. There’s a very good one here that’s got more cream in it than the average. Tastes delicious and you don’t tend to eat as much because it feels more filling.

  4. Lots of vanilla ice cream doesn’t contain vanilla. Its expensive stuff and we’ve had the artificial vanilla flavouring for some decades.
    May find particular artisan ice cream makers using vanilla pods, if you don’t mind paying a few quid for a cone.
    Very nice mind. Just not something most people appear to want.

  5. In times gone by, ingredients in some ice-creams included ‘non-milk fat’. We were of course expected to read that as non-fat milk.

    Back then this coy ingredient which dared not speak its name was whale blubber, but then came the whale-huggers and it was replaced with vegetable fat.

    Nothing new under the heavens, just later generations with no history think there is.

  6. It’s amazing what a bit of blind testing shows. I’ve had compliments on the red wine I serve. It’s Spanish plonk comes in 5 litre bottles at under £4. I really ought to re-bottle it as Bordeaux A.C. & raise the tone of the establishment.

  7. Bloke in North Dorset

    Shouldn’t that be “Which? are being idiots here”?

    They must be close to going out of business. I see they’ve let products use their recommendations in their advertising so no longer the independent organisation of old, so it can’t be long until what’s left of their reputation is wiped out.

  8. @bloke in spain, August 27, 2018 at 10:14 am

    Surely it’s what it tastes like, not what’s in it?


    Same applies all foods inc sausages & haggis

  9. The obvious solution is to nationalize the ice cream business.

    “We tried freedom, but it failed. People put partially reconstituted dried skimmed milk in ice cream (sic).”

    ‘Cept the state won’t allow natural vanilla (not free trade), or dairy cream and fresh milk (contain fat). So ice cream must be banned.

    For your own good.

  10. Another downvote for Häagen-Dazs* here. Mind you, I’m spoilt because I can walk to the Beechdean farm shop outlet, through fields containing the Jerseys that produce the milk.

    * which is, of course, a wholly invented name, designed to fool USians into thinking they’re getting proper foreign ice cream, rather than standard American dross.

  11. Bloke in Costa Rica

    I hardly ever buy ice cream in the supermarket anymore. When I get the occasional craving there’s a number of excellent gelaterias nearby.

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