This seems entirely sensible

I’ve been married 27 years to a man I love very much. We’d always been happy and our sex life was passionate until 10 years ago, when he announced he wanted to live as a woman. There was no warning, no discussion, and I was shell-shocked; I told him that were he to have surgery, the marriage would be over.

We eventually arrived at a truce, whereby he agreed not to have surgery and I am trying to live with the way he presents himself, which is stereotypically female – using makeup, dresses, tights and a bra. I find this hard to deal with; although I was very attracted to my partner as a man, I find it impossible to be attracted to him as a woman.

I also recall a journalist (HuffPo? Verge? Summat) who had been a woman living with her wife and transitioned to male. The wife then took a girlfriend.

Maybe, you know, the wife was a lesbian who didn’t find men attractive? Possible?

20 thoughts on “This seems entirely sensible”

  1. Surreptitious Evil

    Hmm, the first tranny-maniac comment “you must stop dead-naming her”. Well, if the person she married is dead, then she’s a widow and gets the house & the cash?

    More seriously, Christ I feel sorry for the kids.

  2. I find this hard to deal with; although I was very attracted to my partner as a man, I find it impossible to be attracted to him as a woman.

    Why is this vile bigot allowed space in the holy Guardian?!!

  3. From the comments:

    I’m so sorry. Any unilateral not-up-for-discussion decision in a marriage is questionable and this one is fundamental

    Unless the woman wanted an abortion.
    Or the woman wanted a divorce.

    In fact, just about any decision the woman wanted to make.

    Apart from them…

  4. – “I find it impossible to be attracted to him as a woman.”

    By which she means “I find it impossible to be attracted to him as a bloke in a frock.”

  5. Her husband is mentally ill. Given that he’s agreed not to have surgery, he should have intensive psychotherapy to identify why he has this compulsion to live as a woman. By becoming aware of why he finds pretending to be female sexually arousing and why he finds male roles burdensome, he could be cured of his delusions. Testosterone patches would help.

  6. She’s sane, he isn’t.

    Does the transgender insanity cause more human pain than the anorexia insanity? Dunno.

    Presumably it causes less than manic depression or schizophrenia. If there were any sane and trustworthy psychiatrists I suppose we could ask them.

  7. We’d always been happy and our sex life was passionate until 10 years ago, when he announced he wanted to live as a woman. There was no warning, no discussion, and I was shell-shocked

    Aren’t sudden and massive changes in behaviour indicative of serious illness, like brain cancer or something equally horrific?
    Maybe she should have insisted he have one of the brain scans NiV says we can use to determine gender and check if there’s a problem.

  8. I remember the good old days when editors refused airing the laundry is public. This needn’t be part of public discussion.

  9. @ jhg but Wally had his bits off, as did James/Jan Morris, whose wife also stayed. This loon hasn’t. Different entirely.

  10. Dennis the Peasant

    We eventually arrived at a truce, whereby he agreed not to have surgery and I am trying to live with the way he presents himself, which is stereotypically female – using makeup, dresses, tights and a bra.

    Lady, you’re a fucking fool.

  11. Bloke in North Dorset

    “Presumably it causes less than manic depression or schizophrenia. If there were any sane and trustworthy psychiatrists I suppose we could ask them.”

    Deirdre McCloskey’s sister is a qualified psychiatrist and she had him committed when he announced he was going to transition. She (Dierdre) now says they’ve made up.

  12. I’m so glad I’m normal and not a leftist, so don’t have to worry about things like this.

    They really are all fucking mad.

  13. My wife wouldn’t allow it, if I were to put on a frock. She’d be jealous, because I’ve got very nice legs.

  14. Adrian said:
    “Richee on platform 15b in Leeds. After Leeds uni open day.”

    Is he finally going to study some economics?

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