What do we think then?

From the comments. An idea:

Let’s offer the timber from HMS Victory to the French to rebuild Notre Dame. And start a petition on petitions.gov to ask for this.

We need the petition properly written – Steve, you want to handle that?

Centuries of aggression against the French, what better sign of peace with our EU partners than to break up the militaristic remnant to the glory of their culture etc cont. pg 94?

You, Steve, would do that better than anyone else around here.

We also then need the email addy’s of 5 people to make the petition go live.

We’ll need an 80 character heading for it. Then a wider explanation in 300 characters. And a 500 character background.

Eh? Not quite G Elfwick but could be fun.

20 thoughts on “What do we think then?”

  1. Are you aware that much of the Victory’s original timber has been replaced bit by bit over the last 200 years?

  2. And we could strip the lead from the HoP to help the repairs. After all, now that democracy is dead we won’t need the place anyway.

  3. Wasn’t it around during the 1st American civil war? What if the white house burns down again? Perhaps keep some of it for that eventuality.

  4. I’ve read that some institutions actually have their own woods to grow trees for repairs. The US Navy for the USS Constitution; a couple of Oxford colleges for roof timbers for their halls; that sort of thing.

  5. I love Notre Dame, my eyes were most moist when I saw the breaking news of the fire, but I think anyone who genuinely thinks we should use Victory’s timbers in the refurbishment should be strung up alongside remainiac MPs.

  6. I ask from ignorance: if you felled a big oak now, for how long would you have to season it before its trunk was any good to a repairer of old buildings?

    Or, suppose you cut the oak into planks, seasoned them, and then glued them together to make a substitute for oak beams: how long would the seasoning take for that?

    Then again, if you are prepared to go that semi-synthetic route, is there any reason to use oak at all? I can see that for replacing one oak beam amongst many, oak might be preferred. But if you’ve got a whole roof to replace, as for Notre Dame, is there any reason even to use timber?

  7. Dearie me

    I reckon roof trusses out of stainless steel – or perhaps aluminium alloy – would be an excellent choice. Very long lasting, doesn’t rust or rot, doesn’t burn.

    (Well, Alu alloy can, vide Falklands, but stainless steel seems pretty safe)

    But if it’s gping to be oak, then let’s make some sort of splash!

  8. Funny enough, dearieme, one of the reasons would be that using materials other than oak would be problem due to fire risk. Oak is actually rather good at resisting combustion. The charring serves to protect the core of the wood. Pretty well any composite material would burn more easily. Steel would need encasing in a fire resistant cladding & the increased weight would impose weight on the fabric of the building it was never designed for. Steel is far more vulnerable than oak because quite low levels of heating can cause expansion & distortion.

  9. Maybe Notre Dame should be given a “green” roof, with pasture for bunny rabbits, beehives, and a meadow packed with wildflowers. Once or twice a year a bloke with a scythe can take the hay crop. (Could you get two crops a year in the Parisian climate? Dunno.)

  10. I’m humbled, Tim.

    I dunno if this is what you’re after? Too obvious or nah?

    Break up HMS Victory and send the timbers to France to help rebuild Notre Dame

    Britain has a shameful history in Europe – Brexit, Agincourt, Bucks Fizz – it’s time we made amends to our EU partners. After the tragic fire, France needs high quality oak timbers to repair Notre Dame. We have a source of timber currently sitting doing nothing in Portsmouth – HMS Victory.

    France has given us so much. Les Miserables was the first novel to destigmatise mental illness. Jean-Paul Gaultier invented the stripey jumper. And who can forget Dogtanian and the Three Muskehounds?

    Unfortunately, Britain failed to reciprocate. We wrecked the first attempts at European integration, in 1803 and 1939. HMS Victory is part of that barbaric past, whose legacy persists – Portsmouth voted Leave in 2016. President Macron admires old relics – let’s send him Victory with our apologies.

  11. BiS

    Yeah, steel expands. But engineering. No need for a rigid roof. It can flex slightly with temp changes/differentials.

    Terminal 5? The Pompidou Centre?

  12. “Are you aware that much of the Victory’s original timber has been replaced bit by bit over the last 200 years?”

    Theseus paradoxically asks, “Then is it really HMS Victory?”

  13. @bloke in spain April 20, 2019 at 1:30 pm

    Oak beams are difficult to ignite.

    Accelerant now revealed to be honey stored In roof

    Another fire caused by eco-loons

    Although reported a “The Bees Survived”

  14. Bloke in North Dorset


    People don’t go to Cathedrals and Minsters to pray, they go to take a selfie to show their friends they’ve been there and then move on.

    Given the price of entry to these places they’d be better off handing it over to Disney and let them rebuild it as a theme park, complete with animatronic gargoyles.

  15. Can the French grieve a few more days before you inject yourself into their business? It’s not about Brits and your oaks.

  16. Do you Brits really want your fine oak in a minaret?

    You should not assume fidelity from the French or Catholic Church.

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