Because bacon

Pigs are as smart as dogs. Why do we eat one and love the other?

47 thoughts on “Because bacon”

  1. This topic bubbled up from the memory.
    I don’t eat dog either-
    yeah but bacon tastes good, pork chops taste good.
    sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie but i’ll never know because i’ll never eat the dirty mf.

  2. Mrs Gump taught us that stupid is as stupid does. If you’re what’s for dinner, how smart are you, really?

    Dorks tend to vastly overestimate the value of what they narrowly understand as “intelligence” anyway (because they spend the first 25% of their lives in fake and gay institutions that reward mostly pointless activities such as memorising things and then writing them down in exams). In the real world, social and technical skills are a lot more valuable than being a virgin swot. How many PhD candidates are as wealthy and well-adjusted as the average plumber?

    Doggos might not be rocket surgeons, but they’ve managed to persuade humans to let them live in our houses and feed them. Of course, the furry master race is still F. Catus.

  3. This is one of the most extreme minority opinions out there, but I’m a vegetarian with no particular objection to dog meat. Those Westerners who enjoy their bacon yet think East Asians should quit eating dogs aren’t doing so from the strongest of positions.

    Brits are squeamish about dog meat for reasons that are different in the specifics to why other cultures abhor meat from cows or meat from pigs, but the same general principle applies: this kind of moral taste is deeply cultural and based on what we’re used to. Only need to cross the Channel to get radically different views on horse meat. Or cross a couple of generations for tastes to change – few of today’s youngsters would enjoy hearing how my parents regularly ate rabbit, even farmed them for meat. Cute’n’fluffy.

    Personally I’d probably draw the line at eating Great Apes. Bit too close to humanity for comfort. But if back when the ancestors lived by the fringes of a forest they hunted monkeys, then I don’t think you can even call monkey-eating “inhuman”. Something we’ve done for a long time and based on how other apes seem to genuinely enjoy hunting and eating monkey meat, something programmed very deep down within us. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkGvblv_ts4

  4. I’ve eaten horse and a lot of bambis, I wouldn’t be averse to eating dog meat, especially from the yappy little bastard that’s just moved in next door.

    I’ll stop eating pig when one of them gets just one GCSE.

  5. You ever tried making bacon* out of dog?

    *Vital vitamin essential to health. Not to be confused with a product of the same name produced by Walls

  6. Because a long, long time ago some humans made a deal with some special wolves: “If you treat us like family we promise to do the same.” The deal is still in effect.

  7. In a bad year for stupid*, this question has got to be near the top of the stupidest things I’ve heard since 1.1.20.

    Even my Mohammedan girlfriend admits to salivating whenever I eat anything porkish – even though it’s one thing, the avoidance of pig, that she really does stick to.

    * Or do I mean, ‘a good year’?

  8. A Modest Proposal

    Many sub-saharans have IQs below those of an intelligent dog (c.56) or pig. So let us eat sub-saharans, who are largely surplus to requirements and possibly a different species…

  9. If the economic situation becomes really dire like Venezuela then dogs and cats soon start vanishing. Most people have a problem eating their own pets, but neighbourhood strays and so on would be fair game.

    As for the Chinese and Koreans (historically known as “Dog Eaters” by the Japanese), remember the words of H.R.H. Prince Philip.

    “If it has got four legs and it is not a chair, if it has got two wings and it flies but is not an aeroplane, and if it swims and it is not a submarine, the Cantonese will eat it.”

  10. Who says that humans don’t love pigs? A century or two ago (and more recently in WWII) many poor families kept a piglet in their garden until it had grown big enough to eat and treated it as a pet; many stories of kids crying when pig was killed and sometimes refusing to eat it.

  11. M’Lud

    Fascinating, isn’t it?

    I have plenty of Mohammaden friends who all happily drink, fornicate, gamble, never darken a mosque’s doors, do drugs and gamble, but not a one of them will eat anything piggy.

    My Jewish friends? Pretty much the first thing they did on leaving home was to scarf a bacon sandwich.

  12. Recusant, I hadn’t realised it was quite such a thing but, yes, you’re right. Pig is their line in the sand.

    Dumb bunnies. Pig is God telling us we’re all right, after all.

    On the other hand, I quite like the a la carte approach to religion. The absolutist one, by contrast, is where the bombers of schoolgirls go.

  13. “ Why do we eat one and love the other?”

    They clearly think this is a very clever killer argument. But almost everyone instinctively understands why and realizes that anyone who asks why is a prat.

  14. The old joke, an RC priest and a rabbi talking about sin.
    Priest: Tell me, rabbi, did you never eat a bacon sandwich?
    Rabbi: Well, yes, to be honest I did. But, did you ever go to bed with a woman?
    Priest. Actually, yes, I must admit, I did.
    Rabbi: Better than a bacon sandwich, isn’t it?

  15. You want to eat meat? Then how about an animal that is omnivorous, has litters of 6 or 8 several times a year, grows like wildfire because of its diet? Beats animals that have one (or very occasionally 2) offspring once per year, and grow rather slowly because of all nutritious things, they eat fucking grass! The pig is the choice eat, rather than a dog, because a pig is big and bloody delicious, and a dog is a lot smaller and likely to be fairly rank.

  16. Bloke in North Dorset

    MBE,

    “Those Westerners who enjoy their bacon yet think East Asians should quit eating dogs aren’t doing so from the strongest of positions.”

    My problem with Asians eating dogs is the way they are/were killed, more like tortured, by beating them to death with sticks to get adrenaline running to tenderise the meat. I don’t eat battery chicken (I’m not much of a chicken fan anyway) for similar reasons, I think its barbaric.

    I know I’ve eaten some rather strange things when working in Asia and one of my HK colleagues would never tell me what I ate on one occasion in seaside city of Qinhuangdao, where I was guest of honour as the only westerner on the team. His advice was just eat it.

    Mostly I assume that what is eaten is cultural and safe and I don’t have any hangups, other than the husbandry ones, which I appreciate is cognitive dissonance.

  17. @BIND

    Interesting take. While I’d never try to force my vegetarianism on anyone else, I also couldn’t take a position of “anyone can eat what they like, reared and butchered however they like, provided it sits well with their own conscience”. I think there are certain ethical or environmental standards – hunting endangered animals for food, for example, and some husbandry practices. Probably quite a lot of types of meat that can’t be produced in an economically viable way if those standards were imposed. Except in exceptional times, I think dog meat would generally be off the menu.

    @RichardT

    “They clearly think this is a very clever killer argument. But almost everyone instinctively understands why and realizes that anyone who asks why is a prat.”

    On one level this is absolutely true, it’s a very deep gut feeling that – like you say – overrides all the intellectual argument. But it’s also interesting how “instinctive understanding” can be so different between cultures – times and places where dogs do get eaten, times and places where eating pig is anathema.

    @Theo

    I know your proposal is channelling Swift, but still… the idea that sub-Saharan Africans have the same IQ as dogs and represent a different sub-species of Homo sapiens is the kind of crap that Timmy is perfectly entitled to tolerate out of his love of free speech, but also the kind of comment that makes his posts virtually unshareable with the “persuadable normies” out there. You often bemoan the decline in Britain of your preferred brand of political philosophy, but if a fundamental part of that whole package is believing black people are a separate sub-species with the IQ of dogs, then it’s doomed, because that’s something that can barely muster any traction in the Britain of 2020 and has no hope of being acceptable in the mainstream come 2030 or 2050. If you need people to believe the same as you on that front before you can feel you’ve got your country back, you are never going to get your country back.

    There is research on that controversial nexus of genetics, heritability, intelligence, ethnicity and race, but I don’t think it says what you hope/think it says. Even if you could never bring yourself to reassess those beliefs, what’s the point darkening the internet with it? I know you don’t care one hoot that someone reading it might find it deeply personally hurtful, though if you justify that with “truth matters more than hurt” then you probably owe it to your supposed cause of truth that you should sit down and read the research (in the round, not just cherrypicking the bits you find agreeable) and spend some time assessing your views. But just pragmatically aren’t you concerned it makes your personal brand of conservatism less tenable, less popular, less likely to survive, if you promulgate it in concert with views about black people that would be regarded as utterly abhorrent by most members of society?

  18. Bloke in North Dorset

    MBE,

    I realise I was ambiguous. I don’t have a problem with what people eat as food, I do have a problem with how the animals are treated.

    I don’t class thinks like shark’s fin*, rhino horn etc as acceptable.

    * different if the whole shark is eaten.

  19. I suspect like many we are about to find “Silence racist” Trumped by “Silence paedophile”.

    Then shit will get miserably ugly but Theo will just look like an early adopter….

    We shall see.

  20. Oh, MBE I can think of a lot of people would agree with Theo on the Sub Saharan African question. Probably extend it to the W. Indies. Not based on rumour. More on personal experience. Unfortunately, for some inexplicable reason, they’re unlikely to vote Tory. Although that begs the question; why anyone would vote Tory?

  21. @MBE
    Addressing what you’ve written, I have a friend who puts a pretty strong case for why N. Europeans & other races have an affection for dogs. When N. Europe etc were settled after the ice age the human/dog partnership was essential to it being possible. The conditions were too hostile to go it alone. People didn’t bond with dogs didn’t survive. There does seem to be something to it. Very young N. European children are more likely to go “Nice doggy” & want to pat it. Southern children more often react with fear. It doesn’t seem to be just cultural. And a lot of dog friendly people actually like the smell of clean dog. Why puppies get cuddled. Apart from on the barby, does anyone actually like the smell of pigs?
    Unfortunately it’s not the sort of subject for which you’re likely to get a university research grant.

  22. And, of course, there’s the unpopular view that if you accept the theory that humans evolved in sub-Saharan Africa, everyone else has had to go through the genetic bottleneck of moving to & surviving in places not Africa. Natural selection can select for all sorts of things. It certainly selected for paler skins.

  23. I suppose the fact that we never had a pet dog when I was a child and I’ve never owned one as an adult explains to some extent why I don’t have any particular affection for dogs, to me they are dirty, smelly animals that are likely to cause annoyance, e.g. aforementioned yappy dog. But then, we did have rabbits as pets when I was a child and I’m certainly not averse to a nice rabbit stew.

  24. Sub-Saharan Africans (ie what to the outward eye are, um, black chaps) don’t get on with West Indians (is black chaps).

    Speaking as a honkey in an overrun metropolis, one of the few rays of, if not quite hope then of…, is just how readily the vibrants turn on each other.

    I see this a lot.

  25. MyBurningEars September 23, 2020 at 7:35 pm – “Except in exceptional times, I think dog meat would generally be off the menu.”

    That was unexpected. You had this big lead up to the opposite conclusion. Dogs are not endangered. They are not reared in cruel or inhumane conditions. So why should Asians eat them?

    “On one level this is absolutely true, it’s a very deep gut feeling that – like you say – overrides all the intellectual argument.”

    Which is presumably why ex-Muslims often do not eat pork. It is hard to teach a child religion. It is easy to teach them disgust and the disgust we learn young is likely to remain for life.

    Now apply this argument to homosexuality. Hmmm.

    “the kind of comment that makes his posts virtually unshareable with the “persuadable normies” out there.”

    Is it? Isn’t that concern trolling? What do you care?

    “if a fundamental part of that whole package is believing black people are a separate sub-species with the IQ of dogs, then it’s doomed, because that’s something that can barely muster any traction in the Britain of 2020 and has no hope of being acceptable in the mainstream come 2030 or 2050.”

    Time s change. Who knows what 2050 will be like. But we can be pretty sure of one thing. Black men will still not do well at School and they will commit a disproportionate am o9unt of crime. We see no change in these trends.

    So maybe people will be more honest than you think? Eventually the Romanians were.

    “There is research on that controversial nexus of genetics, heritability, intelligence, ethnicity and race, but I don’t think it says what you hope/think it says.”

    Africans are genetically so different from other races that they might be called a sub-species if they were bears or bison.

    “if you promulgate it in concert with views about black people that would be regarded as utterly abhorrent by most members of society?”

    Concern trolling again? The Left often uses the “it will make people suffer” excuse to ban things they do not like. I do not agree with Theo but it isa reason to defend his right to say it.

  26. @Doc Bud
    ” aforementioned yappy dog”
    I have a theory that inside every dog is a wolf. With the smaller breeds that wolf is getting mightily pissed off because there’s so little room in there. Chihuahuas are the worst.

  27. “Why do we eat one and love the other?”

    Dogs are (well used to be..) useful living tools/weapons that can easily be tamed and even bonded with , and that are generally not good eatin’.

    Pigs aren’t useful tools/weapons, are in their wild form far more dangerous than wolves, and taste very, very good….

    Not surprising since pigs are, from a genetic and physiological point of view, the closest you can be to humans while not being in the family tree. More so than many family members even…
    So they’re a one-stop-shop package for most everything we need nutritionally.

  28. ‘from a genetic and physiological point of view, the closest you can be to humans while not being in the family tree. More so than many family members even.’

    You’ve just reminded me of long pig. Must admit I’ve never tried it, though one does wonder whether it’d taste better than a bacon sandwich.

  29. “You’ve just reminded me of long pig.”

    My grandfather – born 1872 – was, a youngish naval officer, sent to the New Hebrides in the late 1890’s to formally accept the pledge of fealty of some chief to the Queen Empress. This was followed by feasting where, as he discovered afterwards, the thigh meat of some chap(chappess?) was served.

    Whilst being disheartened to discover that he had partaken of a cannibal feast, he did say it tasted exactly like pork…Exactly.

  30. @MBE “Probably quite a lot of types of meat that can’t be produced in an economically viable way if those standards were imposed.”

    Veblen Goods?

  31. Grikath September 24, 2020 at 3:04 am – “Dogs are (well used to be..) useful living tools/weapons that can easily be tamed and even bonded with , and that are generally not good eatin’.”

    Dogs seem to have evolved to manipulate our emotions. Pressing our instinctive reactions and protective emotions. So it is not a surprise that eating them seems so wrong.

    I think they are proof the materialist approach to the world is wrong. From a material point of view, dogs are in charge. We provide them with a home, food, clothing – and they offer us nothing much in return. Marxists should argue they are the exploiters.

    But we can cut their balls off. Q.E.D.

  32. Best bacon sarnie recipe?

    1) Well-toasted sourdough

    2) Let it cool a little

    3) Lashings of salted butter (steps 2) and 3) can be interchanged)

    4) Allow the butter to melt (a little)

    5) Brown sauce (yes, pipe down at the back*)

    6) Fried (not grilled) streaky bacon, crispening but not yet fully-browned on the fatty parts, and from a good butcher**; you want about two layers thereof

    Et, voila?

    * tomato ketchup, or tomatoes, are perfectly acceptable … but not quite the thing.

    ** This is important. One butcher I tried sold me bacon which tasted of fish pellets.

  33. I love the Empress of Blandings.
    Eating bats and pangolins is disgusting, even worse than eating dogs.
    There is (was, before refrigeration) some justification for the prohibition of pig and shellfish. In hot countries when they rot they do produce nastier bugs than other meats.

  34. MBE

    You recognise that I was channelling Swift, and yet you come over pompous and priggish. I was not seriously suggesting cannibalism; and I was mocking the notion that the intelligence of an animal or species determines whether it is morally edible.

    Numerous studies have shown that sub-saharan IQs are low, for whatever reason. Some sub-saharan countries have average IQs of 60-70, so it is very likely that many of those people have IQs equal to or even below that of dogs and pigs. Some sub-saharans still practise cannibalism.

    For everything else, see what SMFS wrote.

  35. Hog roast or dog roast?
    Gutted and skinned, put on a spit above an open fire, I doubt you could tell the difference between suckling pig and andrex puppy. Well, one of us might be able to…

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