Seriously, do fuck off Honey

Via email, the beginning of the next lunatic campaign:

The UK will consume 19.2 billion single non-recyclable face masks in 2021. Most of these will be sent to landfill, the weight equivalent of 5 Eiffel Towers. Some will end up in watercourses causing an environmental nightmare. A new campaign has been launched in an attempt to reduce this number.

“It’s really important to consider the wider impact of single-use face masks as they can’t easily be recycled and end up in landfill, in rivers and the sea – that’s why we are supporting a new petition on the Government to ban their sale to the general public”,

Crippled JC on a pogo stick some people are stupid.

24 thoughts on “Seriously, do fuck off Honey”

  1. Seriously, do people really only use single use facemasks just once? As for the “reusable” ones black is a very common colour for obvious reasons.

  2. You’d need a heart of stone not to laugh here. You mandate something – and they now want to ban the sole vaguely ‘safe’ method of wearing one. the multi person gallows that you have been working on for the better part of a decade cannot come soon enough. Where’s Albert Pierrepoint when you need him?

  3. I think that it is a brilliant idea. All imports of masks must stop forthwith and it should be made illegal to wear one.

  4. The face mask devotees will either die or realise wearing a bacterial culture over your nose and mouth and providing optimal warmth and moisture conditions, is not a good idea. If they don’t keep out the flu virus (American Association of Physicians and Surgeons (, they’re not going to work on the smaller corona virus unless it has magical qualities.

  5. I wholeheartedly support this campaign for all the wrong reasons. Where can I chuck 50 quid in the pot?

  6. Bloke in West London

    I’ve just been using a neck gaiter. Very breathable, can even see through it. Probably does nothing about the WuFlu, but they only said you need a face ‘covering’, not a mask…

  7. Ljh,
    My dentist tells me his colleagues are talking about a condition they’re calling “mask mouth”.

  8. I am getting narked by the number of discarded masks that find their way into my garden. How do I sign up for this?

  9. To get some perspective, 5 Eiffel towers is about 50 thousand tons. The total amount of waste going to landfill each year is about 45 million tons, so single use face masks would be about 0.11% of all landfill. Statistically speaking that’s a gnat’s fart in a high wind.

  10. Yes, I’m getting what I describe as nappy rash on my face as masks are perfect for clamping moisture against your skin.

  11. RlJ: one of many possibilities. See also bacterial pneumonia, erysipelas, candidiasis, and then longterm byssinosis from the fibres reaching the lungs to initiate their fibrosis, for starters

  12. I too am entirely in agreement with Honey. Reusable facemasks will need to be washed at 90 degrees to eliminate risk of legionnaire’s disease, etc so they should be banned too.

  13. Ok

    Lets look at the numbers

    19.2 billion is approximately 290 for 67 million inhabitants

    But children do not require face masks

    People only need face masks if they leave home

    My observation is most people are not using single-use facemasks

    The vaccination programme has already started which will presumably reduce facemask requirment

    I conclude this is more fagpacket green propaganda overstating a non existent problem

  14. Gunker: their trial of a variety of masks was done out of genuine curiosity and before mask wearing became political. You know preCovid, pre Orange Man Bad, Read the trial and decide for yourself if it’s well designed and useful.

  15. How does the mask know it is supposed to be used only once?

    I’ve been wearing a ‘single use’ mask for months. Though my use is a minute a day or so when doing something somewhere that requires a mask, like going through the gym lobby, or using the golf course restroom (the course shrubbery is getting watered a great deal more now). A few minutes weekly when in grocery store. It is an icon of political obedience, not a medical device.

    ‘Most of these will be sent to landfill, the weight equivalent of 5 Eiffel Towers.’

    Weight isn’t a consideration in landfills. Whatever the mass, it just lays there. Volume is key issue with trash. Consider a mask thrown in with the rest of your rubbish: does it make a difference? Hell no.

    ‘A new campaign has been launched in an attempt to provide employment for the campaigners.’

    Fixed it.

  16. But children do not require face masks

    Whenever I see kids emerging from school, they are all wearing facemasks. As are their mums waiting inside their huge cars

  17. Yeah Gamecock. When I went to the hospital I was given a facemask. It worked ok provided I held it away from my nose and mouth so I could breathe while walking.

    It’s still sitting in my shopping bag in case I need it.

  18. I bought a scarf, cut it up into triangles so they look like the masks the bandits wore when they held up stagecoaches in the cowboy films of my childhood. Not as restricting as the ‘proper’ face masks and, because they are loose around the lower part of the face, do not affect possible breathing problems. Easily washable, I have even experimented with soaking them in whisky and vodka before drying them, with mixed results. Well, you have to try and think outside the box.

  19. The Second Wave has struck in all its glory, despite all the panicky and asinine government mandates. It appears that the effectiveness of face masks is purely illusory. I agree; ban their sale.

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