‘Ello Mum!

I’m so thankful for my daughter but I wish someone had prepared me for the physical toll of childbirth
Elicia O’Reilly
I wonder how the early days with my baby might have been different if I’d had a better understanding of what to expect from my own body

It’s just possible that someone near to you might have told you if you’d asked…..

9 thoughts on “‘Ello Mum!”

  1. It’s tough to be the first to have ever done something. Those who follow her will benefit from her experience.

  2. DocBud- he he. pre mums net pregancy today would’ve been a good Mag business. No need for copy as every journo would write and submit stuff as soon as they could hear the pitter patter of little footsteps. Put in a review or two about pushchairs and piles cream. the rest ads (for pushchairs and cream). Still quite niche though. Pretty sure only first time mum’s would buy the mag.

  3. So Much For Subtlety

    Well f*ck me. I suspect my patience with stupidity is lower than normal right now. Seriously? How f*cking lazy do you have to be not to ask? She has never listened to mothers complaining? None of her friends talking about their post-sex-life?

    We are only a bi-sexual species that has been reproducing this way for hundreds of f*cking thousands of years. And no doubt the women have been complaining about the toll child birth takes on them for roughly 99.999% of that time.

    Wake the f**k up and smell the diapers honey.

  4. Giving birth is hard work and quite painful, especially the first time. But it’s not a disease and it’s not especially dangerous. Perinatal maternal death rates ranged up to 85 per thousand 200 years ago, now the rate is 0.1/1,000.
    And even before antiseptics and pain relief most mothers did OK. Even Caesar’s mother survived the caesarian.
    Anecdatum. My wife seems to have enjoyed it, as a good excuse to turn the air blue and accuse me of the most dastardly crimes.

  5. “up to 85 per thousand 200 years ago”

    To put that in context, 85 deaths in 1000 live births is a really terrifying statistic.
    This is 1 in 3 women dying in childbirth. It’s just the other 2 banged out 5 nippers and the unlucky third often popped out quite a few before one got her.

    0.1/1000 live births is more like 1 in 5000 women dying in childbirth.

  6. Dennis, Clear-Eyed As Always

    It’s amazing just how completely lacking in common sense Guardian columnists tend to be. They always seem surprised by outcomes that could have easily been foreseen had they do just a bit of research.

  7. And yet, in my experience all it takes for some people become a complete expert in child rearing is possession of a vagina. Those that wail about mansplaining have clearly never seen a widowed father bringing up a daughter on his own. The daily barrage of deeply patronising and usually contradictory womansplaining is incredible. After all, what can a bloke possibly know? Solicited advice from those I respect and those with some actual experience is welcome, of course, and I have a mother and a sister, but by far the most strident (and worst) instruction comes from girls barely out their own childhood with a fresh baby and a social media feed full of huns and babes telling them what awesome mommas they are for changing a nappy. They can’t wait to tell me what I’m doing wrong. Not far behind, though, are the childless prunes still seeking Mr Right in their 40s but somehow in possession of unlimited parenting wisdom. It used to wind me up royally. Now I just patronise them right back with my expertise on the pros and cons of sanitary towel brands and make recommendations for their own use. They don’t like it but they do shut up for a while.

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