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A phone call from a hospital bed

“Ah, yes, hello there. You rent cars do you?”

“Yes sir, we’re a car rental company”

“Jolly Good. Well suited to your occupation then.”

“How may I help you today sir?”

“Do you rent out Fiats? Fiat Unos?”

“I sorry I can’t help you with that car hiring desire today sir”

“Pity, I particularly wanted a white one. But you have other cars do you? I don’t suppose it matters that much”

“We rent out Chryslers sir, these days that’s nearly the same thing as a Fiat”

“Well, I’ll take one of those. And a map, I need a map. My man will need to be able to find the tunnels near Santa Barbara.”

“May I take a credit card to reserve the booking?”

“No, the laddie will use his own when he gets there.”

“I do need a name for the booking sir.”

“A name, ah, well, Phill……yes, Glucksburg.”

“Thank you Mr. Glucksburg, you have a nice day now”

“It’s getting better all the time.”

6 thoughts on “A phone call from a hospital bed”

  1. “ They live in LA

    Black up some SAS men, do a drive-by, blame the Crips.”

    Santa Barbara is a different place in many senses.

  2. Didn’t “The Supreme Gentlemen” and Isla Vista Killer Elliot Rodger live in Santa Barbara? Maybe just dress it up as some random psycho killer with a gun and a grudge? Perhaps an outraged critic who decided that after the travesty of Suits, dear old Princes Sparkles and he simp Hubbie needed to sleep with the fishes…

    Not that I give a shit whether she lives or dies, but at least it would get her insane mutterings about “Muh Racism” off the front pages.

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