Blimey

Most primary children ‘will be unable to swim length of a pool by 2025’

4 years is a long time for a length…..

20 thoughts on “Blimey”

  1. Definitely not around here – our pool shuts at 2000. But hey, more swimmers drown than non swimmers, that’s a fact.
    Also, there’s always the chance you might meet a Len Fairclough in the shallow end.

  2. I’m a reasonable swimmer now, 2.4 miles in 90 minutes, but I didn’t learn to swim until I was about 14. We actually used to do fundraising events so that we could have a pool at our school. The pool was built during the time that I was there.

  3. Such is the dearth of my achievements and qualifications that in my desk drawer is a proficiency certificate from the local schools swimming and lifesaving association to confirm that on 12th July 1962 I swam 50 yards.

  4. I wonder what happened to my school swimming costume with the little coloured ribbons (denoting success at swimming 1 length, 5 lengths, etc) you used to have to get your mum to sew on..?

  5. that guy that who drowned off waterloo/london? bridge recently trying to save someone who fell in. There were already thousands of signatures petitioning he be given the george medal before his friend went on GMTV and revealed another stranger actually saved the woman…and, if they exist at all, the calls for that person to be honoured were somewhat muffled. The friend, sensibly didn’t go in because he couldn’t swim- thus the well known fact- if you can’t swim you’re far less likely to drown. Now i suspect the guy who drowned was a better swimmer than all his friends but not an experienced open water swimmer but no matter, you could be duncan goodhue and still be odds on to cop it in those conditions. It was too cringey/sad to watch all of that interview but i don’t think that act, dangerous and selfless though it was, should be honoured because we also know that you;re just as likely to be the victim if you jump into a large tidal river at night, and two families grieving is a worse outcome.

  6. I did lifesaving in my teens. We were always taught to approach people from behind to avoid the person grabbing onto you clinging on for dear life.

  7. I’ve long been a strong swimmer – couple of years in Italy as a child meant I did more than near all UKites – and I was tipped the wink when doing the usual lifesaving teenage courses. Wise old boy pointed out that if you were actually going to be a lifesaver rather than someone who could be on some rare occasion it’s worth learning how to throw a punch in the water. Because you might well want to “calm” someone so they don’t drown you too…….

  8. We learned to swim in the school hall – not because the roof leaked but because, ironically, the one at the Council swimming bath did so that was shut. But it was the term to learn to swim, so in true State planning style we learned to swim – lying on the (dry) floor doing all the arm and leg motions. Always been better at breast stroke – crawl hurt when your arm hit the floor (fortunately we didn’t even attempt butterfly).

    It was a nasty shock the next year when we actually had to do it in the water. All that wet stuff? We might drown!

  9. Guess the crisis time… is this about the obesity ‘crisis’ or the climate ‘crisis’?

    Well fat people are more buoyant, so less likely to drown so maybe not the obesity ‘crisis’. However by 2025 London and New York will be under water because of the climate ‘crisis’ and being able to swim long distances – to the shops school, work, etc – will be necessary, so must be climate ‘crisis’.

    We had swimming lessons at secondary school for 4 years, because most primary school children could not swim. I left school barely being able to swim a width and I was not alone in my class, with a few who couldn’t even make it across the pool.

    So more of the usual fake news making out there is a new problem caused by……………. Insert your favourite crisis.

    I didn’t manage to be able to swim a length until I was in my 50s.

  10. ‘I was tipped the wink’

    what is that a euphemism for?

    Given information with a strong suggestion of it being secret and passed surreptitiously.

  11. You have to be prepared to be brutal with the person you want to save. They are reliably uncooperative, so you have to grab them by the neck /chin and stay well clear of flailing arms. It’s hard to keep that up for more than a minute or two, so you need to get to dry land PDQ. I don’t know that stretch of the river very well but if it is embanked then it means that both are going to end up in Deptford Creek.

  12. Having learned to swim in an open air sea side pool where the water was refreshed every high tide. I bravely showed off my ability in the hotel pool on a Spanish holiday. Very quickly, I learnt that fresh water isn’t as buoyant as sea water and, after ending up with conjunctivitis, why the word ‘pool’ starts with ‘p’.

  13. I learnt to swim when young (five, maybe?) at the nearest public baths . When I was about eleven we were on our summer holidays and my father announced he’d give me a prize (ten bob? a quid?) if I swam a mile. We calculated the number of lengths required and I set off. I managed it too but only because my father bribed the pool attendant to keep it open for an extra hour.

    It’s dogged as does it.

    I never warmed much to swimming in a pool. It was usually the sea or the river for me as a lad.

    I’ve been out on a trawler where I was the only one of the crew who could swim. The fishermen believed that if the boat was wrecked the safe thing to do was to stay with it – swimming away was far too dangerous. So they didn’t teach their children to swim.

  14. Stttt… Tim.. The Calming of A Panicked Swimmer is a professional trade secret… 😉
    ( it’s also why waterpolo ( and often underwater-hockey as well) is part of any “pro” level swimming certification here… 0:) )

    And honestly.. If they want to save kid’s lives they won’t teach them how to swim, but how to float… Different technique, takes a lot less effort. And saves the panic if they realise their pool techniques do not work well in open water, but simply floating will..

    That’s the first thing they teach kids over here in Clogland.. The swimming a distance is a nice bonus that comes with it.

  15. Open water and rivers is very different to pools, agree good floating technique and staying alive long enough for help to get to you is better for most people than wasting a lot of energy trying to swim ineffectivly

  16. I only learned to swim when in my twenties. I worked with someone good enough to be a competitive swimmer and he encouraged me to learn. I was never a strong swimmer but when in my forties I capsized a canoe at the tail of a weir on the river Aire and quickly realised that there was no way I could swim out of it.So I just turned on my back and floated downstream until I found a shallow bit and could then wade to the side.I took great pleasure in that I had not choked on or swallowed the Polo mint that I was sucking at the time.

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