How apt

The UK’s entry, Embers, sung by James Newman, finished last, failing to win a single point. It was the only Eurovision act to receive 0 after the juries of all 39 countries allocated their points.

That might well be all that’s left of that career.

Although many a cyclist has had a second life as the last to finish in the Tour de France, no?

21 thoughts on “How apt”

  1. Hey, let’s play a drinking game while watching Eurovision.

    Every time the UK’s entry gets ‘nil points’ take a sip.

  2. Feeling masochistic, this morning, just played the UK entry on YouTube. First minute of it, anyway. Oh dear! WTF? It was definitely overmarked, wasn’t it? Does the UK now actively refrain from competing, now?

  3. Perhaps a middle finger would be appropriate. I vote for Jayne County & the Electric Chairs as the UK’s entry next year (that it’s a yank shouldn’t be a barrier).

  4. The Germans actually take this shit seriously, they can’t believe we treat it as comedy.

    I expect they think we’ve been soundly told off!

  5. “Maybe the UK’s entry next year should be “We’ve f*cked off and we don’t care””

    Exactly, Eurovision is more of a national popularity contest than a music one. Lets not keep pretending otherwise. If we’re going to finish last, do it in style.

  6. Tim

    As Bloke in Cyprus notes, given all the shameless mutual back scratching that goes on in the scoring, a shame our oldest ally, Portugal, did not display solidarity by giving us even a single point.

    Mind you, the UK song was boggin’.

  7. Welll… Given that it seems peeps in the UK doing the entry forgot that it’s mildly mandatory that in a singing contest a singer should actually be able to, you know…., sing
    Sending in someone who would be pulled off the karaoke set in the local pub, because…. is not exactly going to get you any points, browny or otherwise.

    Weird thing for me is that there are plenty of decent UK singer/songwriters/musicians/bands that would fit right in the whole GayWokeEmpowerment circus that this particular masturbatory shitshow has become.
    Plenty of them doing the dutch club circuit before WuFlu and Brexit anyway.

    Why send a fat asthmatic fvck who can’t sing to save his life with so many other options?

  8. BraveFart,

    “Mind you, the UK song was boggin’.”

    It’s all pretty mediocre, though. Other than comedy value, why would you listen to this? You’re not going to get another Waterloo or What’s Another Year, because anyone with that much talent is working on Rihanna’s next single. They don’t need a song contest to get their talent beyond national borders any longer.

  9. @tractor Gent

    The last time the UK entry was sung by a Yank we won. (Katrina & The Waves, 1997.)

  10. I think Terry Wogan had the right idea this year…

    Terry Wogan’s been dead since 2016, but as you say, that has a lot to commend it.

    Maybe the UK’s entry next year should be “We’ve f*cked off and we don’t care”

    Best idea is to keep submitting “God Save the Queen” (traditional version, not the punk version), every year until they bar us. Bonus points for including the anti-haggis muncher version.

  11. I am happy to accept that the Eurovision voting is all part of an evil continental plot, but nul points sounds about right for the British entry.

    We should at least have fun and enter some attractive people, who put on a bit of a show. Camp it up a bit, perhaps. Even better, what is Farage’s singing voice like?

  12. @G2/bom4

    I haven’t seen or heard a single second of this year’s contest, so quite literally don’t know what I’m missing. But I tried explaining to a Russian last week (whose family were planning their whole weekend around the contest!) that Brits take the contest ironically rather than seriously, and they were genuinely offended. Felt like we were making light of something that was valuable to them, for reasons I cannot fathom. (Perhaps for Russia being at the contest signifies being accepted as a European nation or something deep like that. But even so, why does that oblige anyone to take the ‘music’ side of it seriously?)

  13. “Even better, what is Farage’s singing voice like?”

    Literally can’t be worse that the fat geezer on stage yesterday… 😛

  14. Get a performing seal called Nul Point and get them to stand there just reading a list of all the times since 1066 that we’ve either kicked their arses and/or saved them…

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