It’s a conspiracy! A conspiracy I tell ‘ee!

So, the head of the employers’ organisation for lorry drivers is pissed that the government won’t allow cheaper EU – ie, Visegrad – lorry drivers to come work in the UK post-Brexit. This means that those employers of lorry drivers will have to raise wages, suck back into the trade all those qualified but doing something more interesting. Plus spend more on training etc.

Oh dear, what a pity etc.

At which point wave the bloody shirt of the retail network entirely breaking down unless there are immediate and speshul visas for Visegrad lorry drivers.

So far so normal in political brinkmanship. At which point the P³ tells us that:

I have checked the story in Motor Transport, which appears reputable

First, it would seem as if a D notice has been issued to prevent this story being discussed. That the supply chain might get worse is not being mentioned in the media.

If the subject is subject to a D Notice – for non-Brits this means government censorship on national security grounds – then Motor Transport would not have been able to publish on it and also there’s going to be a knock on the door in Ely sometime real soon.

D Notices are comprehensive.

It’s also possible to wonder whether there ever would be a D Notice on a bit of scaremongering and strong arm tactics by an employers’ federation.

But, you know, conspirazoids and all that.

I just hope that it is understodd that the issue is Brexit though, because it is. This is not Covid issue. Time will tell.

Well, actually, given that the media has in fact been covering this:

Gaps on supermarket shelves are likely to continue for several months unless the government does more to tackle the labour crisis hitting haulage firms, suppliers have warned.

Logistics and hauliers’ organisations said August would be a pinch point in the shortage as workers take summer breaks, while firms offering bonuses and sign-on fees to recruit drivers were not helping matters.

And:

It also found that supermarket group Asda had joined Tesco in offering a £1,000 signing-on fee for HGV drivers amid a shortage in qualified workers that prompted dairy group Arla to offer a £2,000 bonus.

That’s just the first two results for “HGV driver shortage” on The Guardian site. At which point we can put the D Notice thing to bed.

We might also note the following:

Shane Brennan, chief executive of the Cold Chain Federation, said the issue was getting worse: “We’re firefighting right now. We have got a lot of vacancies but also a lot of workers on holiday. We’ve got a short-term summer problem. We’re going to have interruptions on the shelves – we’re resigned to that.”

Rona Hunnisett, of Logistics UK, said there was “a pinch point with holidays. These guys have been working flat out since the start of the pandemic.”

She urged consumers to be patient and not overbuy: “There is plenty of stock in the supply chain, in all the warehouses. And plenty of fresh homegrown produce.”

At which point we might think that it’s not all that large a problem. And there’s also this:

Andrew Opie, director of food and sustainability at the British Retail Consortium, said: “Government must rapidly increase the number of HGV driving tests taking place, fill gaps by providing visas for EU HGV drivers, and also look for a longer-term solution to this issue.”

Driving tests. For how long have the training schemes and test centres been closed? A year and more you say? So we’re going to be short by a year and more’s new entrants into the trade, aren’t we?

Which is another one of those little details which seems to have slipped through that non-existent D Notice.

Still, at least we’ve this fun to consider. The Motor Transport piece was July 27th. The two Guardian pieces are Aug 2 and Aug 3. But there’s a D Notice preventing the media from discussing this.

Perhaps the biggest shortage is tin foil – hats for the making of – in Ely?

33 thoughts on “It’s a conspiracy! A conspiracy I tell ‘ee!”

  1. Strictly speaking, I’m sure in the Street of Shame “putting a story to bed” usually meant it had finished the editing process & was ready for print. The D-notice story would be “spiked” as unusable

  2. Of course when newspapers were run by proper newspaper men & not wet behind-the-ears graduates any & all P3 output would have been spiked. Although the Beano might have requested a sight of it.

  3. The lack of lorry drivers has been entirely created by the government with its management of the covid crisis. Closed driver test centres means no-one who might want to train as a driver to avail themselves of the obviously rapidly rising wages for driving lorries can do so, and the idiot track and trace thing has either forced people to self isolate, or (as I suspect) allowed many of the lazy and malingering to have a free summer holiday. I bet in the right sort of pubs there’s a going rate for someone who has tested positive to allow your phone to be next to theirs for a while, thus creating a free holiday. IMO its no surprise this pingdemic arose just as the summer holiday period (and some nice weather) arrived.

  4. “Rona Hunnisett, of Logistics UK, said there was “a pinch point with holidays. These guys have been working flat out since the start of the pandemic.”

    “She urged consumers to be patient and not overbuy…”

    Sounds like it’s time to panic buy. 😉

  5. Doesn’t matter what industry you’re talking about, the message is always the same.

    Uk employers: we’ve tried NOTHING and we’re all out of ideas! Infinity immigration NAOW!!!1!1

    They’ve been running this scam (privatise the profits, socialise the costs of cheap migrant labour) on the public for so long it probably does seem like the natural order of things to them. The Bourbon monarchs also probably thought they were entitled to unlimited free biscuits.

  6. The only shortage I’ve noticed in supermarkets in the last week or so has been bottled water. Luckily, the stuff that comes out of the tap is a suitable alternative.

  7. First, it would seem as if a D notice has been issued

    Ritchie does love to pretend he’s part of some ‘Resistance’ doesn’t he? Although defying non-existent ‘D’ notices and regurgitating the Establishment view doesn’t seem particularly brave to me.

    I just hope that it is understood that the issue is Brexit though, because it is.

    He also hates British workers.

    …while firms offering bonuses and sign-on fees to recruit drivers were not helping matters.

    The Barstards, paying drivers more when there’s a shortage of drivers!

  8. With all of this, it’s numbers, numbers, numbers.

    “Gaps(1) on supermarket shelves are likely(2) to continue for several(3) months unless the government does more to tackle the labour crisis hitting haulage firms, suppliers have warned.

    Logistics and hauliers’ organisations said August would be a pinch point in the shortage(4) as workers take summer breaks, while firms offering bonuses and sign-on fees to recruit drivers were not helping matters.”

    1. How big are these gaps? Lack of organic balsmamic vinegar or not even baby formula?
    2. how likely?
    3. How many is several?
    4. How big a shortage.

    And two other things:-

    a) how many people are taking a summer break this year? I’m not this year. I don’t care for beaches and UK weather is no better than being at home. Even if I wanted to visit some churches or whatever, it’s no joy having to stick on masks etc etc to do so.
    b) how do bonuses not help? I’ll bet there’s some retired guys with HGV licenses who will stock up on Yorkies and get behind the wheel if you pay enough. I know a retired guy who helped with some old COBOL during the pandemic. Tiny project and for a month they were offering eye-watering rates.

  9. Steve,

    “They’ve been running this scam (privatise the profits, socialise the costs of cheap migrant labour) on the public for so long it probably does seem like the natural order of things to them. The Bourbon monarchs also probably thought they were entitled to unlimited free biscuits.”

    This was always my objection. I don’t mind Ashok coming over from India to work on SQL Server. But baristas are a cost. British people working in those jobs don’t pay their way in terms of tax contributions to cover health, education, housing etc. Importing more of them is crazy.

  10. No shortage of basics –bread, milk, meat, potatoes etc. Shelves empty/declining-crisps/soft drinks etc. No shortage of booze etc. So no end-of-world yet. Johnson created shortages . But he plans more LD shite for winter. So more shortages may be on the way to bolster his vax pass power grab

  11. “the stuff that comes out of the tap is a suitable alternative”: not where we live. It’s perfectly safe but it’s hard water from Artesian wells. That is to say, it doesn’t taste good.

  12. Boganboy – farmers are the worst for lachrymose special pleading. Always crying about their perks, protections and subsidies, but I’ve yet to meet a poor farmer.

    BoM4 – I know, right?

    I actually do object to Ashok on the grounds that I work with Indian “techies” and the great majority of them are crap. Yet to meet a customer who’s outsourced IT to Tata or whoever and hasn’t found it to be a horrible, shitty disaster with incompetent fucknuggets who barely speak English and can’t even image a laptop without Googling it first. The Indians have already destroyed Silicon Valley, because their main priority once you hire them is getting all their cousins hired, then their cousins, ad infinitum. If Indians were great at tech there’d be great Indian tech companies, but there aren’t any. Something about a low trust society that runs on baksheesh and fraud.

    But at least they’re “cheap”.

    It was amusing when the Tories rolled out their extremely liberal new immigration policy and British employers were screaming that they could no longer get “skilled” labour to mop floors or pull pints (while claiming housing benefit, child benefit, working family tax credits, etc. etc.)

  13. I know it’s a minor point in the scheme of things of which this fuckwit has only passing understanding (Murphy, not Worstall, though here Tim does seem to be labouring under the same misapprehension), but there is no such thing as D Notices, and hasn’t been for years (they’re called DSMA [Defence and Security Media Advisory] Notices, and before that they were called DA Notices), and they are not enforceable anyway.
    They’re just advice, as the name implies.
    Journalists can and very regularly do ignore them.

  14. “Journalists can and very regularly do ignore them.”

    Assange, to take an example.
    Still in prison having yet to be charged with an offence, much less a guilty verdict.
    As with Tommy Robinson, the State’s preferred outcome is he conveniently dies in jail.

    But no harm ignoring a D notice, by any other name, it stinks just as foul.

  15. Assange was jailed for a year (half to be served) for jumping bail. The judge at his trial commented that Assange was “a narcissist who cannot get beyond his own selfish interest” and he had “not come close to establishing reasonable excuse”. He’s now banged up because he’s fighting extradition and the justice system has reasonable doubts about his hanging around if he were released.

    Zero fucks given.

  16. The bail jumping sentence is long since served.
    He remained in prison.
    The extradition attempt was rejected.
    He remains in prison.

    Not a very pleasant character, agreed, but when they came for him, etc.

    I don’t agree with Craig Murray on many matters either, but they’ve come for him now.

    Oh, and the ‘voluntary guidance’ offered (as mentioned by ‘Interested’), it’s about as voluntary as carrying a passport and driving licence, but with added impacts for making trouble. Impacts of the Constable Savage kind.

    It seems ‘journalism’ means parroting the official line. Or else.

  17. Presumably this latest Greatest Crisis To Hit Retailing (since the last one) means that retailers are now prioritising deliveries?

    Perhaps they should get Amazon to do it? Never seems to be an issue getting stuff from them. Maybe they are just better organised?Maybe their drivers have HGV tickets but prefer driving a van?

    Maybe their supply chain model needs amending rather than getting the taxpayer to subsidise it?

  18. It would appear according to a spokesman for the industry yesterday on Talk Radio, that the problem is pay, the Eastern Europeans worked for less and have gone home, leaving a shortage.

    But there are 600,000 registered HGV drivers and only 300,000 working , the rest refuse to work for the low wages offered to eastern Europeans and have found better paid employment elsewhere, that allied with the holiday period is what most of the shortage is about.
    So no real shortage of drivers.

  19. What wiggiatlarge sez..

    And meanwhile on the mainland the Poles are complaining about the Bulgarians who are complaining about the Romanians complaining about the drivers from Balkanistan undercutting wages while being “licensed” to drive a heavy vehicle on western-european roads..

    Fun innit?

  20. Steve,

    “I actually do object to Ashok on the grounds that I work with Indian “techies” and the great majority of them are crap. Yet to meet a customer who’s outsourced IT to Tata or whoever and hasn’t found it to be a horrible, shitty disaster with incompetent fucknuggets who barely speak English and can’t even image a laptop without Googling it first. ”

    I’ve mostly had a good experience, but with independent guys. I’m going to guess that Tata are like every other large, wanky agency.

  21. Surreptitious Evil

    Nothing such as a “D Notice” for many, many years. And, yes, I’ve been a govt censor of UK media (admittedly from an active war zone but …)

    And it’s always lovely to see the rape apologists club together for the Aussie narcissist.

  22. Could someone tell me what P³ relates to. I suspect it is some sort of shorthand to describe the sage of Ely but I cannot work out what it is.

  23. Spud was once asked on some eco Zoom meet how he was qualified. He said he had read very important people on green issues back in the day, developed the Green New Deal to where it is today and as an aside had picked up 3 Professorships along the way.
    A day or two later (this was April 2020 during the LD1 shortages) how marvellous it was that the pizza shop had reduced the size of its menu to basic options and all the customers were still all right with that. The Meissen Bison brilliantly suggested that the Ely pizza shop should offer a Tre Professori to complement other simple offerings such as quattro stagioni.
    And it got shortened to P³ from there.
    Or something.

  24. The Assange Swedish rape caper is cockrot–so bollocks to “rape apology”.

    Not a nice man but showed like Snowdon and Murray what shite goes on behind the scenes. He has done nothing to be jailed for and should be out and on his way.

  25. ‘Tim the Coder’ – they’re ignored regularly you daft cunt. Things have changed due to COVID advertising bribes I dare say, but that’s a different matter.

  26. Chris Miller

    “ He’s now banged up because he’s fighting extradition and the justice system has reasonable doubts about his hanging around if he were released.”

    How the fuck is he planning to leave? Asking for 70 million people.

  27. @Interest
    Would you like to stand bail for him? As long as he’s a flight risk (maybe he’ll try the Russian embassy next time) he should be kept on remand.

  28. Bloke in North Dorset

    “ Would you like to stand bail for him? As long as he’s a flight risk (maybe he’ll try the Russian embassy next time) he should be kept on remand.”

    Where have all the luvvies gone?

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