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We’ve got your answer right here

Romans hostages in their own homes as rampant wild boar rule the streets
Community leaders in Italian capital warn locals not to venture out late at night for fear of being attacked by increasingly aggressive pigs

Additional advice – cook it long and slow…..

33 thoughts on “We’ve got your answer right here”

  1. Bloke in North Dorset

    That reminds me, we didn’t see wild boar on the menu on our recent trip to Germany, is it out of season or not something they serve in the former DDR Lande?

  2. Wild boar ragu is delicious and very popular in Tuscany to my certain knowledge. This does seem to be something of a pretend problem.

  3. Isn’t the difficult bit with boar getting it to transition from live stroppy pig to conveniently dead meat?

  4. They are bastards. Killed a guy up the road in the suburb from where I am. He tried to chase one out his garden, it bit him through the leg, he bled to death.
    We had the same problem at the house in SW France. Whole mob of them. Assault rifle thinned them out though. Local butcher came & took the corpses. Made fine sausages. But best hunted with a 12 bore & solid shot. Blows big holes in them. Pistol grip pump’s the thing for being amongst trees & undergrowth. And a pig spear for last line of defence & for finishing them off.
    They’re some idiots actually talking about introducing to the Sussex forests before I left. Maybe they think they’re cuddly. Good way to cut down on surplus children, I s’pose

  5. Yeah, the abos finished off all the dangerous things in Oz except the crocodiles and the sharks. But naturally we now have wild pigs too. Twenty four million of them, they say.

    As you point out BiS, the solution is a gun. Of course if I tried to fire one I’d probably kill myself instead of the pig.

  6. Been out in the Hungarian brush (ie, thin forest) hunting them in my time. The traditional weapon there is a three barreled gun. Two shotgun cartridges and then one barrel, the third, loaded with shotgun cartridge but the one solid slug. That’s if the first two just enrage it and you need to stop it as it “moves” toward you.

    As you know, but others here might not, the thing about a pig spear is the barrier half way along it. To stop the enraged and dying boar from continuing to approach even while wholly speared and still getting you with those tusks.

  7. Julia

    Yeah Berlin is very badly plagued by them. Whole platoons of the beasts go around wrecking peoples’ gardens and every grass verge in the city has been dug up.
    Urban boar don’t seem to grow as big as country boar, perhaps because the food is different. Used to see them occasionally ( alive and dead ) in rural Austria, absolutely massive, T-72s of the porcine world.

  8. How come we don’t eat more game? Scotland has too many red deer, and they’re delicious.

  9. We have them round by us (and a lot of deer, inc the aforementioned muntjac). My mate Dave the digger driving dry stone walling game warden has a .308 and occasionally pots one from a platform.

  10. Because ‘Bambi’, Steve….

    I eat it any time I can get something other than the tasteless farmed red deer stuff. Roe is especially delicious.

  11. @DoBud
    Yeah You can see from the film why the cut down pump. Long gun’s too likely to have the barrel hit something when you’re trying to aim. And you rarely get a distance shot anyway. It’s different hunting from deer. Whilst you’re hunting the pig, the pig’s hunting you. So you’re weapons are both offensive & defensive.

  12. JuliaM – yesterday the Guardian was crying about how we “need” to reduce our meat consumption by 20% and eat “microbial protein” (yum!) instead.

    Dr Florian Humpenöder, a researcher at the Potsdam Institute for Climate Impact Research (PIK) in Germany who led the study. “The good news is that people do not need to be afraid they can eat only greens in the future. They can continue eating burgers and the like, it’s just that those burger patties will be produced in a different way.”

    It is very kind of Herr Doktor Florence Humperdinck to allow me to eat fake hamburgers made out of goo, but I think I’d rather decline his generous offer and introduce him to the keto-friendly Lions! diet instead.

  13. “Whilst you’re hunting the pig, the pig’s hunting you.”

    This is why the dutch hunters with a permit tend to like to thin them out using perches.
    The buggers can do many things, but they most definitely can’t climb…

    The need to be a crack shot to get/keep a permit helps as well. Very strict on the one-hit kill, our hunting laws..

  14. “a three barrelled gun”: my father liberated a couple of those from a German soldier. Alas he had to leave them behind in Germany when he accepted the offer of accelerated return to Blighty in exchange for travelling light.

    I don’t think he’d have used them anyway. As far as I know he never shot again after the war, except when he taught us to shoot.

  15. The Meissen Bison

    Scotland has too many red deer

    Unwise to trust red statistics.

    Dr Florian Humpenöder

    I diagnose a personal hygiene issue there.

  16. @boganboy
    Yeah, the abos finished off all the dangerous things in Oz except the crocodiles and the sharks.

    You sure about that? What about all the spiders, snakes, blueys and the other myriad of things dangerous to life? Not to mention the road trains…

  17. To be fair, I had the same fears whilst on a night out on Sheffield last week. Not eating those particular wild animals though, however much they plead.

    “Incidentally, what’s muntjac meat like?”
    Tasty if a bit dry. I sausageified one just the other week, Mix in a bit of pork fat and some Cumberland spice mix. Breakfast if champions. The loin barbecued nicely after an overnight marinade too.

  18. Am currently reading Neil Stephenson’s Termination Shock, which features problematic wild boar. Something to do with climate change, apparently ;p

  19. BiS

    We’ve already got the blighters here in Sussex forests. The main problem so far is them wrecking peoples gardens, but apparently they can be aggressive.

  20. @Sam Vara
    They’ve done it? When I heard about tit, 6 years ago, it was still at the talking stage. Not surprising though. They’ll eat almost anything, have big litters & no natural predator. So you can look forward to the first kids being killed.
    Worst thing to do is get between the sow & a piglet. Then she’ll go for it. Still, they eat carrion so harm done

  21. Do wolves and boar co-exist in any regions?
    Also who wins fights between pet dogs and boar. Kind’a curious.

  22. Bongo: Yes, very much. They cover different niches, so they get along pretty well.

    Pet dogs… If you mean the yappy section.. not a lot. A team of hunting Dachses can take out a boar. Terriers can be fast and tenacious enough to annoy them into leaving for peace and quiet.
    Beyond that you’d have to go into Rottweiler territory to have the dogs stand a chance. Basically the breeds that are meant to herd large cattle can pull it off, but even then it’s 50/50-ish if the dog would be of any use after.
    Then again… Swine are quite intelligent, and they will often avoid any dog if they can help it. When they lose that caution because they’ve figured out modern city-folk aren’t dangerous, wellll….. Those are the first that should become pork-chops.
    Of course, the Cuddly-Green-Crowd will fight this tooth and nail.. Until the first couple of victims of a large, efficient, and agressive omnivore shuts them up.

  23. Do wolves and boar co-exist in any regions?
    Yep. Why boar are boar & not sheep.

    And lo & behold, I just found a tin of wild boar meat in the larder. Forgotten about that. Guy in Estonia I know cans this sort of stuff.* Brings me freebies when he comes to Spain. One business man looking after another. He leaves happy.

    *But not that fish the Swedes bury for six months, dig up & eat. Never again. Open a tin of that, you’ll know about it. As will your neighbours. For about half a dozen streets.

  24. Ah… Surströmming… 3:)

    Quite edible. Nice even, once you let it air out a bit.
    I’ve been given to understand you actually are supposed to eat it inside. Not out of politeness for the neighbourhood, but because the ammonia kills/chases all the vermin and bugs away. 😉

    But strangely nice, once you get past the smell.

  25. asiaseen, I wouldn’t think you’d worry about a few redback or funnel web spiders. And taipans and death adders are just the usual poisonous snakes.

    But as for blueys, I wouldn’t have thought lugging a swag would make you feel blue. Still, you might be thinking of bluebottles, with their nice long stinging tail. Of course even the blue box jellyfish can give you a nasty sting. So maybe you’re thinking of the old cartoon that I remember from my childhood; ‘Bluey and Curly’.

    Still, redheads like Bluey are supposed to be prone to having a blue occasionally, but I wouldn’t have thought you’d find them unusual. So I’ve genuflected to the Great God Google, and lo and behold, there’s some sort of kids cartoon on the ABC about a Blue Heeler called Bluey. Oddly enough, she’s blue, instead of reddish, like a normal bluey.

    I suspect this is the one you mean. Must admit I’d never heard of it, but then I can’t ever remember looking at the ABC!!!

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