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“There’s a friend of mine you should meet”

I’m a bisexual woman and I don’t know how to date men

See headline.

Because of this, some bi+ women have chosen to actively exclude non-queer (anyone who is straight, cis, and allosexual, also know as allocishet) men from their dating pool, and turned to bi4bi (only dating other bi people) or bi4queer (only dating other queer people) dating styles. Emily Metcalfe, who identifies as bi and demisexual, finds that non-queer people are unable to understand her queer activism, which can make dating difficult.

On second thoughts, don’t bother.

21 thoughts on ““There’s a friend of mine you should meet””

  1. ’…finds that non-queer people are unable to understand her queer activism, which can make dating difficult.’

    They understand it just fine, love. They understand it means you’re too much drama to be worth bothering with.

  2. None of the women I’ve dated understand my fascination with low-level programming and retro-computing….. so it’s just left out of dating.

    If you want to date a Trot, you hang out with Trots, but if you want to date a woman you hang out with women. This really is getting all Tooting Popular Front of Judea, isn’t it?

  3. A survey in the US recently of people who identified as Bi found that over half of them had never had sex with someone the same sex as them and had only slept with people of the opposite sex. It’s all just labels, games and virtue signalling. Saying your Bi adds you to the in group but you never really have to do anything about it and you avoid the embarrassment of saying you are straight to your activist peers

  4. “The whole world is queer except for thee and me, and thee’s a bit queer.” On second thoughts, delete “thee and,” and substitute “absolutely fucking batshit crazy” for “a bit queer.”

  5. Dennis, Cishet and Whatnot

    I’m a bisexual woman and I don’t know how to date men

    After reading the article, I’d have to call the above a very serious understatement.

  6. I think they’re saying that a woman being bisexual is a showstopper for a lot of straight men looking for a serious relationship with someone who is wife and mother material.

  7. I’ve just done some digging on the background of the author to this piece and she appears to be a bisexual, based in London (a place where there a lots of bisexuals/bisexually active people) whose social circle appears to be full of bisexuals and appears to be plugged in quite well with bisexual activists in the UK (even though these activists represent a tiny proportion of bisexual people).

    Yet despite all the geographical and communal and communication advantages that she has she believes that bi people have difficulty finding dates. I find this difficult to completely accept. What might be putting people, both men and women, from dating people like this author could well be the activism bit. The jargon filled guff that she’s put out in this piece,if it represents how she presents to the world in real life, is probably a deal breaker for a lot of people. Not everyone of any sexuality wants to shack up with a screaming ideologically driven activist.

  8. Dennis, Inconveniently Noting Reality

    I think they’re saying that a woman being bisexual is a showstopper for a lot of straight men looking for a serious relationship with someone who is wife and mother material.

    True. Let’s face it, most guys don’t want more than one pair of pantyhose hanging in the bathroom.

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