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Assume this is true

There are rumours about that the Tories are switching into election mode, with an early autumn election on the cards.

The thinking is not that they will win, but that they will lose least badly then. To fuel that, they think that there is very little more that they can achieve by staying in office. And, they think Labour will make a mess of government so going to the country now brings forward the time when they can get back into office, after just one term on the Opposition benches.

So, the task for the government is therefore to do all those things which will be bombshells that Labour then has to undo.

You know, like G Brown’s 50% tax rate. That sort of thing.

So, a double one on public sector pensions. First, convert all to DC from DB. Secondly, convert the valuation of the DB pension to an actuarially correct one. So that if L do move back to a pension cap and a DB system then they still get hit with the tax bills.

We can go on with lovely lists. Kill import tariffs and watch L struggle to explain the price rises coming from reimposing them.

Cut Scotland loose. And Wales. Manchester is iffy.

Fire everyone with “diversity” in their job title.

Cruise the carriers up and down the Channel at 30 knots through the small boat paths.

No, go on, let’s really swing for it…….

17 thoughts on “Assume this is true”

  1. All those things, and more, could’ve been done in the last 13 years when they had the chance, so why would they do them now?

  2. The Meissen Bison

    I doubt there is a mess sufficiently gargantuan for Labour to make which might obliterate memories of the Cameron-May-Johnson-Truss-Sunak years.

  3. I of course would blow up all the bloody windmills.

    Unfortunately there’s no time to frack the whole of the UK.

  4. Abolish the Equalities Act

    Abolish all “hate speech” laws

    Enact a 3-line Freedom of Speech Act that removes the British government and all its subsidiary tentacles from the business of policing or punishing opinions.

    All of this is free and can be done in an afternoon.

  5. The Tories wouldn’t do that because all their MPs are part of the liberal establishment and fear social exclusion from it. In private they might actually agree with some or all those policies, in public they dare not enact them because they know the consequences thereof for them personally.

    And I think its fair to ask yourself would you do that? Destroy your entire social existence for an ideological end? I know that if I was in that position and voted for all those things I’d lose most if not all of my friends, who are not as right wing as I am. As a political nobody I can separate my political views and my social life, an MP cannot, as his political ideas are public, mine are not. Its like ‘the hand that rocks the cradle’ idea – our decisions are driven more by the social environment around us than rational evaluation.

  6. would you do that? Destroy your entire social existence for an ideological end?

    Course not.

    I’d do it for my children.

  7. Reform the NHS? Abolish the TV licence. Nah, they wouldn’t dare.
    But it might be fun to make private health insurance and school fees tax deductible expenses. Just to see what happens when Labour withdraw the concession.

  8. “I doubt there is a mess sufficiently gargantuan for Labour to make which might obliterate memories of the Cameron-May-Johnson-Truss-Sunak years.”

    Labour says “Hold my beer.”

  9. “And I think its fair to ask yourself would you do that? Destroy your entire social existence for an ideological end? I know that if I was in that position and voted for all those things I’d lose most if not all of my friends, who are not as right wing as I am. As a political nobody I can separate my political views and my social life, an MP cannot, as his political ideas are public, mine are not. Its like ‘the hand that rocks the cradle’ idea – our decisions are driven more by the social environment around us than rational evaluation.”

    I don’t have an issue with losing my social existence, but that’s because my social circle tends to be of particular types, which is smart, curious, hard working. And my ideology of dismantling wasteful parts of government is compatible with that.

    Like you just have to watch politicians at the state opening of parliament, being all chummy. None of these people are serious about their jobs. The Conservative Party aren’t even serious about winning, or they’d have done a whole lot of things that were easy and cheap vote winners (like not doing HS2).

    But you really need to pay MPs more so it attracts people who want to do the job so they can have a big house, a trophy wife and a Porsche. Instead of the losers we get now.

  10. By implementing the 2010 boundaries commission report they would remove Labour’s inbuilt 30 seat advantage – something they could have, should have but didn’t do for the past 12 or 13 years.

    We already know they aren’t going to pass any conservative policies but I still thought they liked being in power even if they barely exercise it.

  11. a) they aren’t going to call an election before the new boundaries are in place, or they’ll be lynched by the commissioners and everybody else who’s done three reviews in a row
    b) they aren’t going to throw away power earlier than they need to
    c) they won’t call a winter election, people hate winter elections, so they won’t go right to the wire to the 4th Jan 2025.
    d) also, they won’t call an election in August, too many people on holiday.

    It will be either May 2024 coincident with the local elections, mid/late June 2024 so they can use the fall-out from the locals to inform their campaign, or September 2024, early Autumn, and assemble in time for Opening of Parliament.

    If they are truely committed to self-harm, they’ll dissolve Parliament *in* *the* *middle* of the local elections, as May did, and piss off all the grassroots who are in the middle of trying to do local campaigning.

  12. Ban the use of “impact” as a verb.

    Can we add “action” to the list of not-verbs to be banned from being used as verbs?

    Can you action this for me? *Shudder*

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