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Start calling them chubsters again then

Increasing number of teenagers ‘don’t realise they’re overweight’
More young people underestimate their size, study warns – sparking fears of unhealthy lifestyle choices

25 thoughts on “Start calling them chubsters again then”

  1. Zero surprise there. The previously unimaginable power of gaslighting means an increasing number of teens genuinely believe that Lizzo is beautiful (just as they see, or more accurately claim to see, no problem with boys being girls and girls being boys).

    The delusion comes with the considerable advantages of being able to stuff your face with KFC guilt-free while spending several hours a day on TikTok.

    The modern-day tendency to wear loose fitting “leisure clothing” isn’t just a coincidence.

  2. I’ll start but I don’t know any teenagers so it will have be Diane Abbott – you’re a lard arsed thick as pig shit fat cow

  3. Being overweight is jolly good for avoiding mortality, at least if you are old enough to be of much risk of death. It’s serious obesity that’s a bad idea and, even worse, being “underweight”.. This lesson is based on mere observational data, of course, and the death data base is presumably short of teenagers, save for the victims or car crashes and drunken fights.

    Anyway, “your puppy fat will all fall off” as my mother used to say. And it all did in the summer when I turned twenty.

    Come to think of it, is the endless killjoy propaganda about weight one of the things turning neurotic teenage girls into anorexics? If so the propagandists are murderers, are they not? String ’em up.

  4. “Anyway, “your puppy fat will all fall off” as my mother used to say. And it all did in the summer when I turned twenty.”

    I too was a chubby teenager, and I too lost all the weight aged about 20. But only because I had the self awareness to realise I was fat (having joined a cricket club and noticed that the ability to run in and bowl fast rather depended on you not carrying loads of extra weight) and had the self control to go on a diet and carry it through. It didn’t just ‘happen’ while stuffing my face with pizza.

  5. What if we followed them around, and said “BOOM!”, “BOOM!”, “BOOM!”, every time they put a foot on the ground?

  6. I lost weight when I had to go to the bother of cooking for myself.

    Though I’d argue that, if people are happy with a bit more blubber, that’s their business. Is it better to spend a lifetime in misery just to have it extend for a few more years?

  7. What if we followed them around, and said “BOOM!”, “BOOM!”, “BOOM!”, every time they put a foot on the ground?

    A cunning plan indeed, Baldrick!

  8. At puberty there is flood of hormones into the system causing a growth spurt which upsets the metabolism, induces increased food intake- obvious why to anyone with two neurones that synapse – and this inevitably will lead to ‘puppy fat’ until the body uses the extra input to go upward not outward.

    This wasn’t noticeable years ago because youngsters didn’t get enough to eat, but didn’t grow much either and got conditions like rickets and scurvy or just died.

    It’s as if all medical knowledge and understanding has been erased after the year 2000 – perhaps by the millenium bug?

  9. Or BEEP BEEP BEEP if they’re an overweight opposition fielder walking backwards towards the boundary rope at Taunton.

  10. A cunning plan indeed, Baldrick!

    I come from a long line of cunning peasants, sire.

    You should see what my ancestors could do with a turnip.

  11. John B,

    “Zero surprise there. The previously unimaginable power of gaslighting means an increasing number of teens genuinely believe that Lizzo is beautiful (just as they see, or more accurately claim to see, no problem with boys being girls and girls being boys).”

    No-one believes this except for fatties and ubermongs that write for the Guardian and various women’s magazines. Thinner women get more dates. But everyone has learned that arguing with the ubermongs leads to pile-ons, bans, etc. And there’s no real advantage, so no-one argues.

  12. dearieme,

    “Come to think of it, is the endless killjoy propaganda about weight one of the things turning neurotic teenage girls into anorexics? If so the propagandists are murderers, are they not? String ’em up.”

    I believe that two things are causing problems with teenage girls
    1) Most of them are miserable at school. Education is generally useful until about the age of 13 or 14 (basic science, maths, English). After that, you will not use whatever the fuck you did with potassium permangenate unless you go and work in something chemistry-related. Lots of kids are bored at school. Boys react by playing up as a way to counter the boredom. Girls get depressed. We’ve made it even worse by forcing them to stay at school until they are 18.
    2) Teenage smoking. No-one ever did the Chesterton’s Gate on the fags. It was always a “stupid habit”. Except, nicotine is a mild anti-depressant. You’re miserable at school, have a puff on a Silk Cut and you’ll feel a bit better. I bet none of these self-harming girls are lighting up.

    A really noticeable thing is how many girls perk up when they start going to work. They feel they’re doing something useful, they have money to go and do things.

  13. The previously unimaginable power of gaslighting means an increasing number of teens genuinely believe that Lizzo is beautiful

    Okay, a bit of social testing then. Ask if teens think Lizzo is beautiful and then say “Because you look a lot like her” and see their faces drop.

    I’m of the opinion that a lot of this claiming that fat is beautiful is done by girls simply to reduce the competition. They know damn well that men will only phuq fatties as a last resort.

    Most of today’s problems of self-esteem and female validation are caused by three’s thinking they’re ten’s.

  14. “They know damn well that men will only phuq fatties as a last resort.”

    On the contrary, I’m reliably informed that black guys love a fat ass……

  15. Education is generally useful until about the age of 13 or 14 (basic science, maths, English). After that, you will not use whatever the fuck you did with potassium permangenate unless you go and work in something chemistry-related. Lots of kids are bored at school. Boys react by playing up as a way to counter the boredom.
    Exactly how I felt. I used to skive off school & go to work. I was running a unit trust offer at 16. Just went back for the exams. And never picked up the O-level certificates. And it’s never made the slightest bit of difference. When other people were being asked for qualifications I was offering experience.

  16. @ dearieme
    Being overweight is bad for you. Being “overweight” as defined by the food/BMI fascists, but not really fat, reduces mortality risk. I have been “underweight” as defined by food/BMI fascists since before they started, but am not going to change my shape to suit self-important idiots who clearly have no understanding of what they are talking about.

  17. “You will not use whatever the fuck you did with potassium permanganate”

    Damn! – you’ve got me wondering what I did with it. I’ve a feeling it might have been soaking blotting paper in a saturated solution, drying it, and then experimenting with its combustible properties. But that was more than 50 years ago, and my memory isn’t what it used to be…

  18. More interesting things than Potassium Permanganate in the school chemy lab when I were a lad. Not so much these days with the usual H&S crap. I do wonder how proto-chemists educate themselves now.

  19. Are they overweight or is it simply that the definition has been changed by fake charities in order to generate more cash so that they can continue to call for more restrictions on food?

  20. @ Clarissa
    The definition has been changed by the glorious NHS which assumes all adults should be the same shape so men and women of equal heights should weigh the same and muscles are light as air so any extra weight following a Charles Atlas course is blubber.
    Any fake charities involved just jumped on the bandwagon.
    BMI is dimensionally invalid – they divide weight by the square of the height instead of the cube (not the fault of the original guy who thought it up – he said Wt/H^2.5 because tall people are, on average, a bit less than proprtionally broad – but some lazy individual decided that it was too much like hard work to calculate the square root of height so changed it to Wt/H^2; originally it was only intended to look at population averages, not at individuals because anyone who isn’t completely blind knows that we are different shapes but NHS thinks “one size fits all”0

  21. @Dave Ward
    AFAIR, David Niven described its use as a venereal disease preventative in the first part of his memoirs, “The Moon’s a Balloon”. That might have livened up lessons a bit much though.

  22. “Wouldn’t that turn your dick purple though?“

    Nope, brown and it wouldn’t come off skin for weeks. To be clear, when I’m speaking of stains it was on fingers from concentrated solutions of the stuff as a titrating agent in labs back in the day, not from the David Niven anecdotes. 🙂

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