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Define “extreme”

Extreme pornography could be banned as part of the biggest overhaul of the legislation in 40 years, says the Tory peer appointed by Rishi Sunak to review the industry.

In an exclusive interview with The Telegraph, Baroness Bertin, the independent reviewer of porn, said she was concerned that adults and children were legally able to view “very harmful” pornographic material online.

Yo the Southern Baptist minister Stricly Come Dancing is extreme porn…..

28 thoughts on “Define “extreme””

  1. Have these people never understood the concept of VPNs?

    You’ve never been allowed to pirate non-porn movies either, but that never made any difference.

  2. So Fishi’s secret love affair with Cameron carries on. Gabrielle gets to look at all the good stuff and we pay her for it!
    All because she was an “aide” to Dave…
    And Chester, these guys don’t know what a computer is let alone a VPN…

  3. Baroness Bertin, the independent reviewer of porn

    Does anyone know where that job was advertised? Asking for a friend…

  4. “these guys don’t know what a computer is let alone a VPN…”

    Yeah, but ask them what’s on page 15,694 of Youporn !

  5. Extreme is whatever they want to define it as that day that they need an excuse to throw you in prison.

  6. ‘Define “Extreme”’

    In the 1970s I was with a group of callow fellow-students hanging around in the college coffee-bar chatting idly to one of our young lecturers. We got to discussing what our favourite sexual fantasies were. There was, naturally, some odd stuff – I remember some bloke wanted a really tall oiled black woman wearing a motorcycle crash-helmet., etc., etc.

    The lecturer said he liked animal+women porn. Someone asked for more details, and he waxed lyrical about about great danes giving Sonia a good seeing to, and a ream of nymphets working on a cart-horse. This being the relative age of innocence, some of us youngters were a bit taken aback.

    One youngster said, “Yeah, you can get all that sort of stuff. My dad’s seen a stripper do an act with a snake…”

    “What do you mean?”, said the lecturer, “What does she actually do with the snake?”

    “Well, she lets it twirl round her and she strokes her tits with it, and then it goes up her fanny…”

    “That’s enough of that talk, lad! That’s completely disgusting!”

  7. Don’t they realise that their power to ban just about anything is totally illusory? Alcohol. Cigs. Fun. ICE cars. Meat. If the rest of us don’t want it to happen, it won’t.

  8. Banning “extreme pornography”, while at the same time encouraging and celebrating “transgender”, which is a mental illness usually contracted through pornography.

    Baroness Bertin, the independent reviewer of porn

    Titles and honours in contemporary British society are just different iterations of the clown nose. Honk, honk.

  9. Don’t they realise that their power to ban just about anything is totally illusory? Alcohol. Cigs. Fun. ICE cars. Meat. If the rest of us don’t want it to happen, it won’t.

    and if bacon ain’t available, I can slow roast a shank of former Councillor at a pinch. I have absolutely no problem with long pork.

  10. “It was so extreme that if they physically had a video with the same images, it would be illegal under laws that would punish possession with up to two years in jail.”

    “These are policed by the official censor, the British Board for Film Classification (BBFC) but only cover DVDs, videos and Blu Ray.”

    Oh dear, the Baroness who is the “independent reviewer of porn” doesn’t actually understand what the law is. The BBFC covers only sales/distribution of media, not possession. Like back in the early 90s, it was 100% illegal for WH Smith to sell a copy of Reservoir Dogs as the BBFC refused to give it a certificate, but you could get your mate in the USA to post you a copy. Customs and Excise didn’t care because they weren’t blocking things not approved by the BBFC but based on things like the obscene publications act.

  11. Bloke in the Fourth Reich

    Extreme porn is like the doctor’s definition of alcoholic, “more than I drink”.

    Extreme is stuff I don’t/can’t get off to.

  12. @ottokring – I’m confused bu the $25000 a night winery – you can drink quite a lot of wine for $25000 (which seems to be about £12500 sterling) I suspect the groom had to be plastered before the ceremony .

  13. moqifen

    As the poor fellow has already done his duty by the fragrant ex Miss Arden, I guess his physical state is no longer so important.

    Can an “expert” please enlighten me. At what point did the Obsecen Publications Act cease to be enforced ? Grot mags of the past were not permitted explicit stuff and films were produced undercover . One had to buy them abroad and hide them at the bottom of one’s case. So I am told.

  14. That’s the venue cost, not the wine cost.

    100 people drinking expensive wine might get to $25,000 anyway, but many of Jacinda’s lot will have been Mormons, so it won’t be that.

    I know a guy who went BTW.

  15. Bloke in the Fourth Reich

    I think we have a winner for our definition of exteme porn:

    Jacinda Ardern’s wedding night video.

  16. As the old joke goes, an internet search for “dogs having sex with midgets” results in a response “too many hits to display, specify breed of dog”.

  17. Dear Mr Worstall

    Does the definition of “extreme pornography” include extremely boring? If not, why not?

    Of the little of pornography that I have sampled (for educational purposes, obviously and on VHS), I found the production values and plots extremely poor. Perhaps there now is a Pornadviser or PIMBD, but I doubt that any commercial production could compete with my imagination.

    Maybe I should start a new career.

    Some background on Bertin:

    After university she almost joined the police. “If Cressida Dick had been head of the Met then, I would probably have taken a completely different career path,” she says. “Role models for young women and young men are so important.”

    It’s a lesson Peppa Pig needs to learn. Bertin was annoyed when her daughter, aged six, declared after watching the cartoon that her brother, four, “can be a doctor” while she would be a nurse.

    Keen on stalking, too.

    If Dick was a role model, heaven help her, though it might have been better for the rest of us, while being worse for Brazilian electricians.

    Married with children, or just “with children”?

    Nice to see that our shiny new forin secretary (ennobler of our porn supremo) has embroiled us in a nice new war only moments after assuming office.

    Oh what a loverly future 2024 beckons, and it’s nice to see that our Beloved Leader Rishi Rich is on top of all the most important crises facing our country, like extreme pornography and extending childhood forever for would-be smokers, while even New Zealand’s new prime minister has decided that former NZ prime minister Adhern’s anti-smoker fantasy is one too far. Meanwhile our own PoW thinks that said Adhern is just the man for the job of awarding prizes to the people who are making sure that the world doesn’t boil Flipper.

    Nice to know our future is in such safe hands.


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