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Unclean! Unclean!

Toxic ‘forever’ chemicals found in hair and blood of MPs and peers
Both Conservative and Labour parliamentarians had samples tested for different substances

As with Foot and Mouth we’ll simply have to cull the herd. Raze the population and sew the land with salt. A pity and all that but the contamination possibilities are just too high.

I do think we should be fair though and insist upon humane dispatching for the Lords.

13 thoughts on “Unclean! Unclean!”

  1. I’m not sure I’m that keen on the smoke from a burning pyre in Westminster. I’ll just have to avoid going to London that week.

  2. If we’re going to cull them, then we should at least give the socialists their traditional send-off:

    A Tokarev to the back of the head.

  3. The Lords used to be the house of the establishment, when the establishment consisted of those thieves who’d stolen all the land and enslaved the cultivators. This seemed to work reasonably well.

    So perhaps it should be converted into the house of the billionaires. That way the plutocrats’d have some way of exercising some sort of restraint on the plebs.

    I’ll be happy to sit here on the other side of the world and see how it all turns out!!

  4. I’d alway assumed it was ‘sow’ with salt, as spreading seeds, rather than joining cloth, no?

  5. “Forever Chemicals”. Sounds scary doesn’t it? At what concentration? Enough to impair intellect? Enough to render incapable of discharging the duties of a legislator? If not, why does it matter?

  6. Similar structure to PTFE, and no-one seems to be complaining about uses of that. If they become more concentrated in the environment then it’s likely that some mutant bacterium will start munching on it. Fluorine isn’t that uncommon in the environment, though never as the element because it’s so reactive, and most things seem to get along with it in its usual concentrations.

  7. “As with Foot and Mouth we’ll simply have to cull the herd.”

    Michael Foot, presumably, and Jess Phillips?

  8. “those thieves who’d stolen all the land and enslaved the cultivators.”

    That was the Anglo-Saxons. And presumably the Danes.

    The Normans were those thieves who stole all the land and freed the slaves.

    For which they get remarkably little credit. I imagine that that’s because people are still befuddled by seventeenth century political propaganda.

  9. Forever chemicals? Not just for Christmas then.

    But since matter cannot be created or destroyed, all chemicals are forever.

  10. @jgh – “Water appears to last forever.”

    Not in the slightest. Photosynthesis converts water (plus carbon dioxide from the air) into carbohydrates. When we eat these cabohydrates, we reverse this, which is why we exhale carbon dioxide.

    @John B – “But since matter cannot be created or destroyed, all chemicals are forever.”

    Firstly, chemical reactions transform one chemical into another, so a chemical can only be “forever” if there are no reactions available to transform it. But secondly, matter can be created and destroyed because matter and energy are two forms of the same thing (E = mc2).

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