Bristol has one of the country’s lowest birthrates. Here’s why
Imagine, if you can manage the horror, living in Bristol. You look at the environment around you and decide you want to bring new life into this?
Quite, quite, all is explained.
Bristol has one of the country’s lowest birthrates. Here’s why
Imagine, if you can manage the horror, living in Bristol. You look at the environment around you and decide you want to bring new life into this?
Quite, quite, all is explained.
I was hoping that all the lead in the Colston statue had done something nasty to their testicles.
Tim, so what’s the scale of this Bath-Bristol rivalry? Are we in Lancashire-Yorkshire territory, or Rangers-Celtic, or does it shade towards Hutu-Tutsi? Inquiring minds want to know.
Mostly it’s an invention in my own head – but only mostly.
“Tractor Gent
Tim, so what’s the scale of this Bath-Bristol rivalry?”
As Tim says, mostly an invention of people from Bath.
Brizzle is gert lush. Having been born in the Southville areal of the city, I can vouch for that.
It’s a bit like the England v Scotland football rivalry. Scotland see England as their deadly rival, England don’t really notice Scotland.
And to proper locals, colsonall is still the colsonall. Pick ee out the stingers!
The key line in that report:
According to the city council, the percentage of births in Bristol to foreign-born mothers increased from 13 per cent in 2001 to 32 per cent in 2022.
So someone can still afford to have kids, then. I wonder who, and how? And there does seem to be a lot of Darwinian gene pool removal going on, but in a less amusing way than most of the Awards.
Nationwide, birthrates have crashed. The average number of children each woman has over her lifetime — which the Office for National Statistics calls the “total fertility rate” — fell in 2023 to 1.44 in England and Wales, the lowest on record and down 21 per cent in a decade. Last week the Royal Free Hospital in north London announced the closure of its maternity service, blaming falling demand.
Why isn’t this a bigger national emergency than Ukraine or Net Zero? Are Vladimir Putin and/or Ed Miliband more important than our country continuing to exist?
Sarah Harper, professor of gerontology at Oxford University, told the Lords economic affairs committee last week that for the UK to sustain its population without immigration, every mother would need to have at least 2.1 children — which is unlikely.
And if we sustain ‘our’ population with immigration, it simply hastens the death of our country. Because you can’t outsource having children to the Somalis if you want a future for English children.
Immigration means ordinary English people can’t afford to start a family in England:
James, who works in finance, agreed. “Bristol is really expensive. Two or three decades ago, people of our age might have been putting a deposit down on a house but now there’s no chance of that. Being able to afford a house, let alone to have a child as well — it’s just unrealistic.” The average house in Bristol costs about £360,000, which is nearly £70,000 above the English average, according to the Land Registry.
Average house costs £360K, but it’s Um Bongo Town where you can play “Spot the White Face”. Fuckzilla.
House price inflation in Bristol is pretty scary. My mum’s house is worth c£400,000 and my parents only paid £1,400 for it in 1960.
“For 150 years the streets around St Barnabas school in Montpelier, a bohemian neighbourhood in Bristol, rang with the sound of children.”
This means dysfunctional, graffiti-ridden hole. It’s next to Stokes Croft where I once did some work and used to walk past two dodgy massage parlours, across the park full of winos (I did admire their commitment to drinking at 8am).
“Tamilla Haycock, 28, and her boyfriend Leon James, 24, who are renting a home next door to the St Barnabas site, are yet to decide whether they will have children. “We lost a lot of years to Covid and we want some time back for ourselves,” said Haycock, who commutes to London a few times a week to work for a retail company. She was brought up in Bristol but added: “If we do have children I’m not sure I’d have them here.””
How do you “lose years to Covid?”. You could fuck, right?
“James, who works in finance, agreed. “Bristol is really expensive. Two or three decades ago, people of our age might have been putting a deposit down on a house but now there’s no chance of that. Being able to afford a house, let alone to have a child as well — it’s just unrealistic.” The average house in Bristol costs about £360,000, which is nearly £70,000 above the English average, according to the Land Registry.”
No, you’re just not trying. You probably still both prioritise all the stupid shit in Bristol like going to the art wank at the Arnolfini, Bristol pounds, the dullness of “weird Bristol”, black and white hippy movies about gay cowboys eating pudding at the Watershed or some sort of craft beer microbrewery. Or simply that you want to appear cool to all your friends (which also encompasses most of that other stuff). Or “doing Asia” and filling Instagram with the same shit as everyone else.
A 2 bed in a reasonable part of Swindon not far from the station is £220K. Which is a more family-friendly place than Bristol. Lower crime. Closer and cheaper commute for the girlfriend. Or £250K in Pewsey. Direct train to London. £200K in Devizes, or something quite charming for £220K. Not as easy for London, bit sleepy but quite a nice place with loads of countryside for little kids.
Steve,
“Average house costs £360K, but it’s Um Bongo Town where you can play “Spot the White Face”. Fuckzilla.”
A lot of it is still very white, Bristol. There’s a load of Jamaicans around St Paul’s. Rest of it, not so much.
I think it’s one of the most overrated places around. They all talk it up as “arty” but most of it is shit like Banksy and other graffiti. There’s a dearth of live music for such a large city. Not much theatre. No IMAX screen. The wine merchants scene has mostly gone. And it’s a bit of a shithole. Clifton’s nice, but you’re into stupid money. I’d rather live in Trowbridge or Chippenham.
Chippenham was probably nice once and it’s still pretty quiet in the mornings before the benefits bludgers roll out of their pits. I really wouldn’t want to live there though.
As an aside, I once spotted Milliband minor charging his little Noddy car at McDonalds on the bypass there. I assume he was en route to Glastonbury. Much to my regret, Mrs Wonky talked me out of buying him a bacon roll. He might have choked on it and saved us all a lot of bother.
Western Bloke said:
“Stokes Croft … park full of winos (I did admire their commitment to drinking at 8am)”
I once made a similar comment when I was in Glasgow for work, but the locals pointed out that although it was the beginning of the day for me, it was the end of their day for the winos.
Still impressive, but in a different way.
It’s interesting to see the response to myself and my partners comments about the decisions that young people make around starting a family, and its correlation with the high cost of living in Bristol.
Among the comments about how the answer to the struggles of the pandemic is to f*ck each other, and the long list of niche things that old, resentful people from around the area expect young people to get up to (most of which I have no idea about), there was some good discourse about the topic!
Also, if you think any young people would bite your hand off to live in Swindon, regardless of whether it’s cheaper than big, scary Bristol, you’re off your rocker.