The ten things we should paint a St George’s Cross on to save Broken Britain
1. Potholes
The original hack. Nothing says “fix me now” like a Union of tarmac and patriotism.
2. Crumbling School Walls
If the ceiling looks ready to collapse, a splash of red and white might turn “RAAC concrete risk” into “national treasure, must preserve.”
3. Boarded-Up High Street Shops
From Poundland to Poundless, slap a flag on the plywood and maybe regeneration funds appear overnight.
4. Burst Water Mains
If St George can slay dragons, surely he can slay Thames Water leaks.
5. Train Carriages with Broken Heating
When it’s minus two and the windows don’t shut, a patriotic paint job might finally make “leaves on the line” less of a national emergency.
6. NHS Waiting Room Chairs
A cracked vinyl seat with yellow foam spilling out? Paint the Cross of St George on it and suddenly it’s “symbolic seating of national importance.”
7. Public Toilets That Closed in 2018 “For Refurbishment”
Paint the door, unlock the cubicle, declare it reopened with a ribbon-cutting ceremony.
8. Street Lamps That Don’t Work
Half the country’s already in the dark, but with a St George’s glowstick makeover, the council will rush to relight them.
9. Uneven Pavements
Trip hazard? Disability hazard? Council shrugs. Trip hazard with a St George’s Cross? Fixed by Tuesday.
10. Wi-Fi Dead Zones & Snail-Speed Broadband Boxes
Paint the flag on the green roadside cabinet, and suddenly fibre arrives faster than you can say “buffering.”
Conclusion: If we can’t fix “Broken Britain” with competence, maybe we can at least fix it with red and white paint.
I’ve seen a picture of an old fridge left outside with a red cross painted on it – presumably the council will be round in minutes to take it away.
Currently in Stevenage, and St George flags have appeared on lampposts here, also I saw one painted in a mini-roundabout. The lampposters got a Molotov thrown at them though.
As I’ve just remarked elsewhere, a visitor has told us that bridges on the M25 are draped in our flags, plus a MAGA flag.
I see a couple of Ukraine flags flying in front gardens near me but so far I’ve yet to see our flags make an appearance. Were I to raise an English or UK flag in my garden I suspect plod would be around a lot more quickly than if they were responding to a break in.
Whilst on a short drive this afternoon, spotted 7 Union flags & 4 saltires.
( Rural aberdeenshire)
At least we can congratulate Sturgeon on one achievement – she’s made the saltire almost toxic for many Scots and the previous numpty brain dead cybernat harassment of proud Brits displaying the Union flag seems to have gone into abeyance.
Whats the point of this sarky little post then?
They’re just showing their support for the Red Roses.
We need to keep some of the lampposts free.
They’re just showing their support for the Red Roses.
For a blue lady?
Michael Deacon beat you to it Richard…
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2025/08/24/st-georges-cross-fix-list/
Nessimmersion: Good to hear. Aberdeenshire always seems to be more in tune with the rest of the country (or have its head screwed on more tightly) than the central belt. Here in the West End of Glasgow, it’s still all Pally flags.