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Does the Telegraph still have subs?

Prostate beam therapy spares patients daily hospital trips

I think it’s likely that this is proton beam therapy for prostate cancer. Not, you know, prostate beam therapy…..

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salamander
salamander
1 month ago

Prostate beam therapy….sounds like a cheesy porn film.

Western Bloke
Western Bloke
1 month ago

Maybe we’ve found the first man where the sun shines out of his arse?

Hans Tholstrup
Hans Tholstrup
1 month ago

fyi – Richard Murphy on YouTube today:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvhflrdTGmc

Bloke in North Dorset
Bloke in North Dorset
1 month ago
Reply to  Hans Tholstrup

There’s a long tradition of not linking to anything Spud unless it’s taking him down, it just inflates his ego.

Grikath
Grikath
1 month ago

That besides the sheer torture of having to look at that puncheable smug mug and listening to his wibble…

Some heroes here can stomach that, but…..

Last edited 1 month ago by Grikath
Hans Tholstrup
Hans Tholstrup
1 month ago

Sorry. I’d never seen the great economist before, only ever heard of him here. Just got a bit over-excited I guess… 🙂

Ottokring
Ottokring
1 month ago

That’d be one crazy super power to have.

Andy
Andy
1 month ago
Reply to  Ottokring
Ottokring
Ottokring
1 month ago
Reply to  Andy

Ha ha brilliant !

Bucko
Bucko
1 month ago

If it’d proton beam therapy for prostate cancer, prostate beam therapy sounds like a good name for it

Noel C
Noel C
1 month ago

It is standard electromagnetic radiation (not proton) but in a more tightly focussed “beam”. The NHS is notably crap at introducing proton therapy (only UCLH and the Christie in Manchester when I last checked).

Grikath
Grikath
1 month ago
Reply to  Noel C

Ummm.. nope… they’re shooting actual protons….

Which…. well… I have an Opinion about that…

Noel C
Noel C
1 month ago
Reply to  Grikath

Not protons, it is X-rays from a LINAC, same story from the BBC today

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/crm02mmgr3ro

“NHS England said it expected all 48 radiotherapy centres around the country to start offering the treatment “within weeks”.”

The NHS has 2 proton therapy centres, not 48.

Jonathan
Jonathan
1 month ago
Reply to  Noel C

‘member when they had a couple arrested because they took their son abroad for Proton Beam therapy?

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/youre-still-failing-him-parents-10462249

John B
John B
1 month ago

Beam me up Scrotum.

Jonathan
Jonathan
1 month ago

” Scotty, energise the Prostate Beam.”

” Aye Cap’n, though ah dinnae think yon Mr Spock’ll like it!”

rhoda klapp
rhoda klapp
1 month ago
Reply to  Jonathan

Just so long as it doesn’t damage the protein torpedo.

Ottokring
Ottokring
1 month ago
Reply to  Jonathan

This one just sat up and begged.

https://youtu.be/CBeBGdVJqZQ?si=FoOmoJ5QqbCxyBuP

Jonathan
Jonathan
1 month ago
Reply to  Ottokring

Lol.

asiaseen
asiaseen
1 month ago

I first read it is protein beam therapy. Better then carbohydrate beam therapy, I guess, better know as baguette up the bum therapy

Ottokring
Ottokring
1 month ago
Reply to  asiaseen

Ideal if you fancy some pork inside you.

Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago
Reply to  Ottokring

Fancy some pork inside you?

Or…the meat thermometer, the love piston, the womb raider, the meat whistle, the pork sword, the mutton dagger, the one-eyed snake, the spunk pump…

Deveril
Deveril
1 month ago
Reply to  Theophrastus

Kidney-tickler.

Rump-splitter.

God, what a bunch of smutty boys we are. And isn’t it marvellous?

But wait, there’s Mary Beard, Stephen Fry and Charlotte Proudman getting up a petition for admission to the club.

[cue: death of the club].

Deveril
Deveril
1 month ago
Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago
Reply to  Deveril

Little obese Kimmy may well watch Bond films. He has executed people by targeting them with munitions. So tanks of tiger sharks or piranhas in which to tip disobedient henchmen would be on his trend. But even siamese fighting fish wouldn’t fit with Pooh Bear/Xitler’s visit.

Last edited 1 month ago by Theophrastus
Ottokring
Ottokring
1 month ago
Reply to  Deveril

In Team America, Kim Jong Il had such a tank with Hans Blix floating in it.

“Hans, Hans. You’re bleaking my barrs here…”

Steve
Steve
1 month ago

I was thinking about this while checking my nuts for cancer yesterday (yes, I’m crude, but you should still check your nuts, lads).

We’ve all seen loved ones die of the Big C. The treatments seem… unsatisfactory? Chemo can be a lot rougher on you than the cancer. Surgery too. Anyway, I decided if I end up with raging testicular cancer, I will just die an intact man rather than lose my Fabergé eggs.

I wouldn’t even get a male dog neutered, it’s not right imo. How could I look Groofy in the face after that? On t’other, we have no reason to be afraid of death. Lots of things are worse than dying. Suffering, for one.

And we need big, beautiful balls for the excitement to come…

4032
Andrew C
Andrew C
1 month ago
Reply to  Steve

This only works verbally…..

  • A good friend of mine died recently – the Big C got him.

Cancer, eh?

  • No, he fell overboard and drowned on a fishing trip.
Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago
Reply to  Andrew C

…only works orally…?

Deveril
Deveril
1 month ago
Reply to  Steve

I, naturally, have people to check my balls for me.

And I have to employ a diary secretary to manage their demands for work.

Fortunately, the min wage does not apply.

Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago
Reply to  Steve

you should still check your nuts, lads

I delegate that enjoyable task to my wife…

[Cancer] treatments seem… unsatisfactory?

In the future, I imagine early 21stC cancer treatments will be considered barbaric. If the cancer is cureable, then endure the treatment. If it’s terminal, then seriously consider refusing treatment. (I found hormone treatment during prostate cancer radiotherapy intolerable and opted for RT only. And 4.5 years later I’m still here.)

I wouldn’t even get a male dog neutered, it’s not right imo.

Anthropomorphism. Animal aggression needs to be managed. In my youth, I put a few tight rubber rings on around the balls of male calves.

And we need big, beautiful balls for the excitement to come…

We will need a lot more “excitement” than we have seen so far. And “excitement” that is more coordinated and probably less thuggish…

Steve
Steve
1 month ago
Reply to  Theophrastus

Anthropomorphism

Yes? I like animals. Couldn’t bring myself to hurt them.

fish-called-wanda-3
Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago
Reply to  Steve

I hurt animals only when it is necessary…

Bloke in South Dorset
Bloke in South Dorset
1 month ago
Reply to  Theophrastus

“In my youth, I put a few tight rubber rings on around the balls of male calves.”

Well, whatever gets you excited; we’re fairly broad-minded here.

Although does the usual proviso of “don’t scare the horses” extend to cattle?

Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago

Like de-horning calves – ie burning out the horn buds – castrating by rubber ring (to cut off the blood supply to the scrotum) is not something in which any farmer takes pleasure. But you want to eat the beef?

Anyway, my farming days are long over. The Original Jim might have something to add.

Steve
Steve
1 month ago
Reply to  Theophrastus

Sure. We need farmers. I just couldn’t do what they do. If I had to work in a shambles, I expect I’d be vegetarian. On t’other, my grandmother thought nothing of wringing a chicken’s neck. She had bigger balls than Steve mayhaps. When I was a little boy, I saw The Plague Dogs and Watership Down, so possibly was radicalised by Richard Adams. Turn around, bright eyes.

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Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago
Reply to  Steve

If I had to work in a shambles, I expect I’d be vegetarian.

Wimp!

Steve
Steve
1 month ago
Reply to  Theophrastus

Harsh.

give-quiche-a-chance-v0-0tz8l54eu7lg1
Hallowed Be
Hallowed Be
1 month ago
Reply to  Steve

Went to see plague dogs at the cinema as a nipper. Best thing about it was the Airplane 2 trailer. (8008135)

Deveril
Deveril
1 month ago
Reply to  Theophrastus

I thought the males were invariably slaughtered within days or weeks of birth (with a few exceptions for breeding purposes).

So why bother to eunuch them?

Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago
Reply to  Deveril

Not back then (1970s): the aim was to grow beef in bullocks.

The Original Jim
The Original Jim
1 month ago
Reply to  Deveril

It used to be that bull semen wasn’t sexed, ie had an equal likelihood of male or female offspring. So in order to get enough replacement female stock a dairy farm would need to get all its milking cows in calf to a dairy bull. The male offspring of which are not suited for beef production, so male calves were routinely slaughtered.

Now however semen can be sexed, so there is a high (90%) likelihood of a female calf. So a dairy farm can get its best producing dairy cows in calf to a dairy bull, and know it will get mainly good quality female offspring to grow on into replacement dairy cows. The lesser producing dairy cows can be got in calf to a beef bull, thus producing offspring that can go into the beef production chain, whether male or female. Resulting in little to no need to slaughter calves at birth.

Any male calf destined for beef production will still need castrating though, to reduce their aggression.

Deveril
Deveril
1 month ago

Interesting. But what’s wrong with meat from the males? Oxtail’s pretty good, no?

Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago
Reply to  Theophrastus

1000022565
Hallowed Be
Hallowed Be
1 month ago
Reply to  Theophrastus

kind of with Steve, though each case is different. My springer’s intact and I’ve never seen aggression to anyone or anything. Lots of boisterous energy though which i love. Of course you have to keep an eye ahead for anyone infirm who might be bowled over if they get in his way at full pelt.

Theophrastus
Theophrastus
1 month ago
Reply to  Hallowed Be

With dogs, castration depends upon the breed and the individual dog. Castration didn’t reduce aggression in my son-in-law’s pure bred fox red labrador, which was nervous and aggressive from arrival…

asiaseen
asiaseen
1 month ago
Reply to  Theophrastus

In my yoof I held the legs of young piglets while my father wielded a cutthroat razor and a dab of Dettol.

jgh
jgh
1 month ago

I remember as a child the bus going past a site advertising “computer tune-up”. I always wondered what they did to tune up computers.

Decades later I discovered it was a garage. It should have stated “VEHICLE tune-up” not computer tune-up. They weren’t tuning-up computers, they were tuning-up vehicles. They were using computerised equipment to do it, but that’s computerISED tune-up not computer tune-up.

Steve
Steve
1 month ago
Reply to  jgh

Have you ever played Street Countdown

til-there-was-a-us-pilot-of-the-it-crowd-and-moss-was-v0-7LX00Q-7wBPdY7Jsq_Yn2IRL8QYi6Dt1gyptn7Eb9jU
Western Bloke
Western Bloke
1 month ago
Reply to  Steve

I just realised the Chinese guy in that episode is Benedict Wong from the Doctor Strange movies.

tnettenba
Ottokring
Ottokring
1 month ago
Reply to  Western Bloke

Why are they all called Benedict in those films ?

Mr Womby
Mr Womby
1 month ago
Reply to  Steve

It can be quite dangerous.

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